The 30s Crisis: A Journey of Growth, Challenges, and New Beginnings Closing Chapter

It took me a while to write this because the last few months have been critical in redefining my career path. I took a six-month sabbatical—but not the one I was expecting.

Last year, I moved to Amsterdam to pursue a personal goal I had built up for over a year. I envisioned my life in a different country, culture, and even language. To my family, it seemed like I was running from something, a rushed decision they didn’t fully understand. But for me, it was a lifelong dream.

I had always wanted to move abroad. In my last job, I was fortunate to live overseas for a month, but it wasn’t enough. I believed this move would be my fresh start—a chance to grow, explore, and prove something to myself. But instead, it led me to the darkest moment of my life so far.

It wasn’t the city's fault, the country's, or even the people’s. The truth is, I had built up an excuse to leave and “start over,” as if what I had accomplished so far wasn’t enough. As if I wasn’t grateful for all that I had built over the years. I’ve always struggled with insecurity, and suddenly, all those insecurities surfaced at once. My self-esteem hit rock bottom, both personally and professionally.

Even though I discovered a passion for DJing electronic music—a creative outlet I truly love—it still wasn’t enough. I felt the pressure to meet a certain standard, to get another degree, to make my CV look more impressive, to push my career forward. But in reality, I was in a difficult place emotionally and didn’t even realize it.

The result? Panic attacks, overwhelming anxiety, and, for the first time in my life, a deep depression. I never imagined myself opening up about this, but I do so now because I know many people go through similar struggles—or even more difficult ones.

After months of support from professionals, family, and friends, I can finally say I’m emerging from my “30s crisis.” I know this won’t be the last challenge I face, but it has given me the tools and self-awareness to prioritize my mental health moving forward.

I want to take a moment to thank everyone who supported me—those who truly understood what I was going through and stood by my side. We often talk about mental health in the workplace, but we rarely acknowledge that sometimes, prioritizing mental health means stepping away from everything to take care of yourself. Through this experience, I’ve realized two important things:

1. You never truly understand what it means to struggle with mental health until you experience it firsthand.
2. Many workplaces are not equipped to support employees facing these challenges without judgment.

As I close this chapter—because I want to start writing about different topics—I want to leave with a message of hope: after hard times, brighter ones do come.

Last year, I co-founded a brand that brings coffee and electronic music together in my home country—a country I once criticized but have come to appreciate deeply. I now lead the business and human areas of this project, a role I shaped after realizing that businesses cannot thrive without putting people at the heart of their strategy.

Today, I am also stepping into a new professional role that aligns with my 10 years of experience—one I had been striving for. I feel excited and ready to regain my confidence in what I do best.

And last but not least, I continue to grow my DJ career. It has been three years, and while progress is slow, I’m in no rush. I’m doing it for the love of the music.

If 2025 hasn’t started the way you hoped, stay patient—you’ll figure it out.

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