3 words on my 40th birthday to my 4-year-old self.

Dear Zack,

We won another race! We defied the odds of our diagnosis. We faced treatments, the red devil, surgeries, bone marrow biopsies, car-T therapy, countless IVs and bloodwork.

I would like to think my relentless pursuit of winning fueled this milestone. But, I know your promise and spirit continue to push me and never allow me to give up.

Your promise to us has lived in me for the last 36 years, and it has served us well...

We won a lot of tennis matches, tournaments and championships... A LOT!

We won a lot of swim races... a record we set at 6 years old still stands unbroken today (34 years later)!

We played college tennis.

We achieved so much much in business... youngest senior director at a retailer, leadership awards, recognition at the federal government level for our strategy, and grown record-breaking revenues.

We have won in different arenas - retail and software.

We have watched many team members go on and achieve on their own.

We've made money, we've climbed to the top, and we have made an impact.

We've defied the last 8 years after our medical diagnosis.

We're surviving cancer.

We're living on our terms.

The winning hasn't come without our fair share of losing... A LOT!

We've hustled.

We've burnout.

We've hit rock bottom.

We've had many ideas fail.

We've had initiatives not take off.

We've learned a lot of lessons.

We've gotten back up.

We've gone again.

When I look back, I hope you can be proud of staying true to our promise. The one you made when he was sitting on your waist, spitting in your face with your wrist held down to the floor...

"You will never amount to anything in life. You will be just like me."

What I have learned is we have always been worthy of love. We chased winning to feel worthy. Something we have desired for our entire life.

We hustled for it.

My wish on today's birthday... for you to finally rest.

You no longer need to chase worthiness.

You are worthy.

You always have been,

Zachary