3 Ways to Improve Your Reality

The following is adapted from Chasing the High.

Changing your reality—how you feel about the world around you and interpret what happens to you—is not easy. I speak from experience. For years, I struggled with a viewpoint that skewed negative. In every opportunity, I only saw the challenges.

It’s not fun living in a reality that always looks grey. I desperately wanted to more fully enjoy my life and my business, so I set about changing my reality. This was all about changing myself, not those things around me. We have very little control over that.

What we can control is how we see things and how we react to them. If you would like to change your reality, here are three things I did that worked wonders for me.

#1: Saying Yes to the Unknown

Many people are afflicted with “decision fatigue.” When an exciting opportunity presents itself, they want to do it… but then they start contemplating the reasons they shouldn’t:

I can’t be out of work during that time. My family needs me to be home. I have a birthday party I need to go to. It’s too expensive for me to go…and on and on.

Overthinking takes control, and the excitement they initially felt fades away. They kick the can down the road, the decision is never made, and the opportunity is missed.

Instead of dealing with a cycle of decision fatigue, try this: if it feels right, consider following those initial feelings and taking action. In this way, you control your reality.

Here’s an example. Recently, a friend from Leukemia Lymphoma Society reached out and asked if I’d like to join a fundraising trip to Africa to climb Mount Kilimanjaro.

Once I heard, it just felt right, and I didn’t even hesitate. It was a “Hell yes” decision for me. I followed my intuition and, along the way, learned the company who would be guiding us on the climb also offered African safaris, a dream of mine since I was a small child. One of the trips happened to be departing right after the Kilimanjaro climb, so I said yes and signed up for a five-day safari immediately following the eight-day climb.

Saying yes to the unknown can be scary, but it allows you to face your fears, live in flow, and experience life in a more free-flowing manner. It personally allowed me let go of my control freak behaviors and have more fulfillment in all areas of my life.

#2: Committing to Authenticity

Another practice that helps me control my reality is my commitment to genuine authenticity. In the past, a lot of people thought I was authentic when, in reality, I hid a ton of stress, fear, anger, embarrassment, and frustration underneath the surface.

Being truly authentic means opening yourself up and discussing or doing things that might make you uncomfortable without worrying about people’s perceptions of you. What I learned is that people’s perception of you is actually a reflection on them.

Committing to real authenticity is not an easy task. It can feel unnatural, as you need to let your guard down and be vulnerable. For example, one of my business coaches had challenged me to do a Facebook Live to discuss my relationship with money.

My initial reaction was resistance and hesitation. I made some excuses as to why I couldn’t do it, but because I wanted to be as authentic as possible, I agreed. Once I fully considered the opportunity, though, I quickly realized the benefits.

My Facebook talks became highly important to me because they allowed me to speak from the heart and open up. I needed that release even if I didn’t know it, and I received very positive responses from my listeners that ended in engaged conversations.

Prior to doing any Facebook Lives, I rarely spoke to anyone about my money, business, or personal challenges. That was not a healthy approach, especially because those issues were such significant pieces of my life. Instead of leaning on other people in similar positions who could provide guidance, insight, and support, I held it all in.

The overwhelmingly positive responses to my talks reinforced my belief that authentic people will gravitate toward other authentic people. Social media can build bonds, like it did for me, but only when used to help you be true to yourself and to others.

That’s how real relationships are built. Since I’ve incorporated genuine authenticity in my life, I’ve carried it offline and am able to do a much better job running my company, managing challenges in business and life, controlling negative emotions, and most importantly, realizing I have the ability to pave my future any way I choose.

#3: Prioritizing a Simple Approach

If you’re in an unhappy marriage or relationship or a job you no longer enjoy, you might recognize you’re miserable but then feel as though you are stuck and have no other option. Why? Because starting everything over from square one is terrifying. You might be afraid of what the other side might look like or if you will be judged.

So instead of doing something to change your reality, you choose to stay stagnant. I say “choose” here intentionally: not taking action is a choice that every one of us has.

I’ve found the most efficient way to disengage from negative situations is to keep things simple. Here’s what I do: determine my goal, set a progression of tasks to help me reach it, and get an accountability partner for whom I can return the favor. Enlisting the help of others along the way has been critical to my success, and it can help you too.

To make my outstanding internal goals tangible, I’ve also found that journaling helps. Writing down everything I want to accomplish—and noting the tasks required to get me to that place—is an efficient method to help keep me organized and on track.

I am a list type of person, so I form my journal in list fashion. The journal approach helps create a schedule with a plan, which lends itself well to bolstering personal accountability. If I write it down and it’s on my calendar, it will get done.

What You Can Do Right Now

If you’re feeling stuck in any way, I’d encourage you to grab a notepad right now and write down five goals you want to meet and how you plan to meet them. It sounds simple, but simplicity can be freeing. If you’re living in a world of negativity, it helps to create circumstances and events that inject positivity into your life.

Living in a world of optimism and positivity feels so much lighter than carrying around animosity and negativity. I would know because I did it most of my life. The more you step out of your comfort zone and say yes to new things, the easier it will be to create change and live the reality you want to live. One small act can have a huge impact.

For more advice on changing your reality, you can find Chasing the High on Amazon.

MICHAEL G. DASH is an entrepreneur, author, recovering addict, speaker, philanthropist, and thrill seeker. He founded the F.A.T.E. series (From Addict to Entrepreneur) published on Thrive Global & Medium, and rolled out a F.A.T.E. program to help entrepreneurs dealing with addiction, which he looks forward to growing. Information can be found at https://michaelgdash.com/fatemasterclass. He is the co-founder of imactivated.com, a social movement focused on inspiring a culture of positivity, authenticity, passion, empathy, and resilience. Michael is an avid volunteer, fundraiser, and mentor, and is dedicated to bringing positive change to leaders of all kind. You can reach Michael via email at [email protected] regarding partnering or other opportunities or check out his site at michaelgdash.com.