3 ways to Have the Discipline To Be Disciplined

Only an undisciplined guy like me could come up with this

Alas, if we could only have the discipline to be disciplined (we can).

Life would be so much better (it will).

We would accomplish more, struggle less and feel so much better about ourselves (true).

You cannot achieve the important things in your life if you’re not disciplined (yep).

You suffer and hate yourself when you’re not disciplined (ugh).

What if there was a way to have the discipline to be disciplined (are you serious)?

And what if it’s actually not all that hard (oh please do tell me more)?

I found it!!!

I was sick and tired of being sick and tired.

Sick of not having the discipline I needed to make my life what I needed and wanted it to be.

(Full disclosure, since childhood I was never ever viewed as a highly disciplined person unlike my @#$%&! older brother).

So, I mustered up the discipline to figure out how to have the discipline I needed.

And how I could have it in a reasonable and doable way.

Two Types of Discipline: Reactive & Proactive

There’s the lack of discipline to write a term paper or finish up a client or work project without waiting until the last minute.

This is called reactive discipline.

These types of situations actually make discipline easier because we absolutely must get it done.

Fail to do so and you fail the class or lose your job or client.

Several years ago, when I had fourteen client projects going at the same time I wondered:

“Maybe I should have gone into the military or been an elite athlete. I’d only need reactive discipline following orders or a strict training regime.”

Ah, the joys of reactive discipline vs. the challenge of proactive discipline.

Reactive discipline to get the client work done (which I didn’t really want to do), was so much easier to apply than the proactive discipline I need to make New Way Forward a success (which I really, really, really wanted to do).

It was too easy-peasy for me to skip or put off New Way Forward tasks because no one was breathing down my neck for it.

Our brains (certainly mine) are great at coming up with rationales, reasons, and excuses to put it off or blow it off.

This B.S. especially rears its ugly head when we’re proactively trying to pivot, transition, or transform ourselves and our lives.

Like going to the gym or finding a better way to earn an income or getting healthy.

I knew I was going to fail and/or take way too long to make NWF a success if I didn’t come up with a way to be disciplined and do it.

I had to find a viable, workable, doable, easy-peasy way.

I needed proactive discipline.

This required a mind shift and the mind shift enabled me to see the light.

I discovered, applied and now succeed because of these three methods.

#1 - Go Simon Sinek on it!

Focus on my why, not just my what and how.

Why am I doing this?

Then…

What do I get, earn or achieve from this?

Then…

How am I going to do this (and be disciplined).

The answer to “Why?” becomes my big-time motivation to be disciplined.

When I think about why I am doing this (income, success, getting it over with because I have to do it, etc.) the motivation is just there and drives me.

I go from just having to do it, to an emotional, purposeful and result-driven reason for doing it.

My why.

The Golden Circle

Simon Sinek’s?famous?Golden Circle TED Talk?introduced us to “The WHY?”.

He noted that we all too often focus on the “What” and the “How” but not the “Why”.

Sinek explains that it all starts with the why. Then the what and the how come from your core desire and motivation (your why).

Our brains and our emotions need to understand the why to fully succeed and be disciplined.

#2 - Go James Clear on it!

Throw in some?James Clear?Atomic Habits?and you really start trending in the right direction.

“Focus on the first 1% of the task”. Then the next 1% and the next and the next…

“Every positive step is a vote for the person you want to be”.

“Small habits don’t add up, they compound”.

“Habits are the compound interest of self-improvement.”

When you succeed at being disciplined and get it done, give yourself some credit.

I literally pat myself on the back and say, “Way to go, Long”.

It may sound silly, but it really works.

#3 Block Your Time

Alas, I discovered that focusing on the why and my Atomic Habits still wasn’t quite enough.

The next step is to make the time and create a structure to do what you need to do.

For me, that meant I had to “Time-Block Schedule”.

I embraced?Cal Newport’s?Deep Work?approach and bought his?Time-Block planner.

Each day I block out time for NWF, client work, the gym, specific tasks and everything else.

Yes, I had to have the discipline to strictly adhere to it. That wasn’t easy AT ALL.

But it’s working and a Jedi mind trick helps as well:

Each time I find myself resistant to asserting my proactive discipline, I realize that once I get going it won’t be as painful as avoiding it.

I’ll just do it and the just doing it isn’t all that bad.

Then once I get it done, I know I will feel great about myself and getting the damn thing done.

This is the cherry on top.

Bonus

I kept hearing about creating the situation and environment to be focused and avoid temptation.

Finally, I tried it, and it works.

For instance, when working at my computer in my home office: Close the door. Turn off the phone and put it in another room. Turn off computer notifications.

This establishes a mindset that I’m here to get it done. Therefore, I just do it with no distractions.

If it works for me, it’s gotta work for you

I estimate my discipline rate has increased by, conservatively, 70%.

That 7-0 frigging percent!!!

Who would have thunk it?

Certainly not my @#$%&! older Eagle Scout, Sigma Cum Laude, Phi Beta Kappa brother.

This morning I focused on my ultimate why and I got this story written and published.

I have a long list of tasks to do for today.

I will get them done.

But if I hadn’t applied these techniques, who knows when or if I would have written this.

Having the discipline to be disciplined isn’t really all that hard.

It’s certainly better than the struggle.

Ahhh. I feel so much better, and life is better now that I have the easy and doable way to be disciplined about being disciplined.

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