3 Ways to Find Your Inner Compass

Welcome to my weekly blog about life, work, and adventure at 40 & 50+, and the lessons learned along the way. (Scroll down to read the blog.)?

If this is your first time reading this blog, welcome. As the former co-founder of a pro-age women’s community, recognized Influencer in Aging by Next Avenue magazine, and Facebook Community Accelerator alum, I launched this blog to share personal insights gathered from my journey through middlescence to encourage us to be a little more empathetic and curious about people of all ages. You never know what someone else is going through unless you care enough to ask. Start asking.

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Dear Middlescent,

I was 37 when “the feelings” began to stir inside. I battled indecisiveness. I lacked motivation, felt mentally lost and was unsure of what to do with my life. Yet, I felt an insatiable desire to do more, to think bigger, and stretch beyond my comfort zone.

But where to start. I had the spark, but didn’t know how to turn it into a bonfire.

While some may say these were classic signs of a midlife crisis, I believe they were signs of a midlife awakening. An awakening is defined as an act of waking from sleep, but it also refers to an act or moment of becoming suddenly aware of something.

That’s it. I was suddenly aware that I, just like you, are created for greatness. Each of us stamped with our own innate talents, voice, beauty, and uniqueness.

Perhaps I never fully realized the magnitude of this truth because for a big part of my life, I was in survival mode.

I was working the long hours to build my career and prove my value. Investing nearly every waking hour in raising my children, hoping they turn out okay. Stretching every dollar to buy a house, get a car, pay bills and more. Booking and often double booking myself to get all that needs to get done, done. And if you’re shaking your head in agreement to this list, you know, this is just the tip of the iceberg.

For decades I was living life to survive, and sometimes, it felt like I was barely making it. Ever felt like that?

Fast forward to middlescence and survival mode takes on a new form. Perhaps life begins to take on new meaning in our 40s, 50s and 60s because we’re on the tail end of the duties life demands from us earlier on.

I found myself thinking new thoughts, being curious about new things and realizing it was my turn to live the life of greatness God had created me to experience.

For some, that may start with a renewed commitment to our health and wellbeing, for others it might be leaving a stressful career to pursue a heart-centered job or start up your own business, and yet for others, it might simply be slowing down and reprioritizing our values in our everyday.

Regardless of what you feel compelled to do, the question is, do you do it? Do you listen to that magic stirring up inside, or do you ignore it?

No argument here, ignoring it would be the easy choice. You don’t have to worry about changing anything in your life. You don’t have to learn anything new. You can simply hit auto-pilot and cruise through middlescence.

But what are you missing out on?

You’ll never know if you don’t act. With that said, here are three simple things you can do to honor that curiosity and see where it takes you.

1. Make a list and check it twice. Take a few days to compile a list of your innate talents (not your skills) to refamiliarize yourself with the essence of you. You might even want to ask others to chime in and add to your list. This list can help guide you to your next career, hobbies or where you decide to volunteer. Check out this blog for the difference between talents and skills.
2. Think beyond the tangible. Answer this question: “What act(s) makes me smile from the inside out?” If you had the choice to fill your day with things that bring you joy, what activities would you be doing? Take this list and cross-reference it with the list from #1 to see how your talents could help you complete these activities.
3. Craft a personal vision statement. When is the last time you got in your car and just drove, with no sense of direction or destination? Odds are good, probably never. Life is no different. While I’m not proposing a hyper-detailed roadmap, I am advocating for a compass to help guide you in the general direction you want to go. Not sure how to write your statement, check out this blog. ?????

Keep in mind that this exercise is not a one and done. These “feelings” will change with every year we live and choose to listen to our heart, so be sure to check-in with yourself periodically to see if what you wrote today continues to serve you tomorrow. And if it doesn’t, change it. There’s more than one way to get to your destination.