3 TIPS FOR MORE EFFECTIVE NETWORKING

Networking can be painful! I know. I am a professional speaker and communication expert who confidently speaks in front of thousands. BUT…(my dirty little secret) I’m not always comfortable networking. See, I’m inherently an introvert. On my way to many events, I encourage myself by thinking of how happy I’ll be when I’m back home on my sofa! But there are ways that I’ve learned to navigate the choppy seas of a room full of strangers.

The other night I went to an event hosted by a networking group hadn’t been to in a while and whose members I do not know very well. As I entered, I immediately saw that the few people I knew, were not there. Soooo I had to employ techniques I’ve learned and shared with clients and audiences over my years of coaching and training.

# 1 - OBSERVE PEOPLE’S FEET.

Several years ago, I created a video series on Body Language. One of them is about legs and feet . In it I talk about how reading people’s feet can let you know which group to join at a networking event.

Most of people in the room I’d walked into were in pairs or triads and they were standing with both feet directly pointing toward the people they were talking to. (Watch the video if you can’t visualize what I’m talking about) This indicated that they were really engaged in their conversation and weren’t that interested in having anyone else join them.

However, I noticed one pair of women standing in front of the bar. One of them had one foot slightly turning out toward the middle of the room. By the positioning of their feet, I knew they’d be the likeliest people to network with. Now I don’t want you to think of this as creepy but here’s the next tip for networking.

#2 MIRROR PEOPLE’S BODY LANGUAGE

If you look around at any gathering you will notice that people tend to mirror the body language of the people, they are chatting with. As humans, we do this instinctively. We are tribal beings after all. When you mirror someone’s body language, they feel like you are one of the tribe and are more likely to include you in their conversation. So, that night, before I even realized what I was doing, I had leaned against the bar in the same way as one of the women, Jacqui. The second I noticed what I’d done, the other woman turned to me, smiled and said “hi”. Success!

After going through the prerequisite preliminaries, Jacqui asked a question which brings us to the third great tip about networking.

#3 ASK INTERESTING TARGETED QUESTIONS

Most people after asking “What do you do?” (Ugh!) will find other generic questions to ask but, after I told her what I did, Jacqui asked me if I had any neat tricks to use at networking events! It was a targeted question that showed she'd been listening and was interested in my work. It gave me an opportunity to confess to the two “tricks” I’d just used which they found super interesting and it sparked some great conversation. So great that when we looked down, we saw that our feet were very much facing into each other’s, forming a “closed” group. To “test” my technique, I immediately turned myself and one foot towards the center of the room. Within seconds… - I kid you not - a guy walked up and greeted us. The three of us could not contain our laughter causing the poor guy to think we were laughing at HIM. But once we explained, we all had a fabulous conversation and I just met with him this afternoon to discuss possible business synergies.

EMAIL or MESSAGE me, I will confess to ANOTHER “trick” I used to help win the trust of the guy who joined us.

Next time you’re at a networking event give these a try. Let me know how they work for you!