3 Tips To Managing Your Post-Election Emotions And Relationships

The results of this past election are stirring up a lot of different emotions in the nation. Many are feeling disappointed, scared, and anxious. They feel uncertain about what the future holds and are questioning how to navigate differences in political views with people in their lives. For some, a Trump supporter represents agreement with “hateful things” (based on what some of my clients are saying) that Trump promotes and if it goes against your personal values, it makes it hard to continue the relationship.

How can we manage our emotional reactions as well as sustain our relationships with others?

Step one is to consider your perspective. As is often stated when it comes to mindset, it is not what happens in life that leads to our emotions, but rather how we think about it. Even if you are a Hillary supporter, think about how much influence any president really has on your day-to-day. A president cannot single-handedly make decisions. Local and State governments also provide protection from some Federal laws.

Step two is to look for the positive. Many citizens are disheartened by the results, primarily because they are afraid of the unknown. We don’t know how things will unfold. To conquer your anxiety, consider being curious about the changes that may come rather than worried. Being worried doesn’t give us greater control. And, you never know – Trump may surprise us all with some new innovative ways of directing the government.

Step three is to consider your values. What’s important to you? Are those values reflected in your friends? If not, look at the advantages and disadvantages of keeping those people in your life. Think about how to agree to disagree. Establish boundaries of comfort when talking about politics with people who disagree with your views. This allows for free expression without being rude or "spewing hatred." Use effective communication skills by asserting your needs and negotiating with the other person about their needs.

So how does this all come together?

We need to be in control of our mindset, which can help us feel better. Take a step back to think about what’s important to you. Lastly, consider additional factors that lead people to vote for a candidate. Politicians typically stand for a number of different issues. Sometimes, voters cling on to one issue they feel strongly about and will vote for that person even if they don’t agree with some of their other stances. In this past election, many voters were dissatisfied with both candidates and some had to find the lesser of two evils. Even if your friend absolutely agrees with everything Trump stands for, you might find other common ground and not let politics color your entire relationship. All this can help you have compassion and save your relationships as well as your sanity.

If you've found this helpful and know other people who are struggling with the election results, please share this with them.

Written by Dr. Sharon Grossman, psychologist and TIME Life Mastery Expert