3 Things You Should NEVER Say to An Audience
Suzannah Baum
Presentation Skills & Leadership Communication Expert ? Author ? Executive Speech Coach ? Keynote & Conference Speaker ? Chocolate Hoarder
Giving a presentation is a huge responsibility. When you’re in that power position in front of an audience, you’ve got to make sure that you’re leaving them informed, intrigued, and hopefully, inspired.
But all too often, speakers can say certain things that totally mess up their message, leaving their audience irritated, alienated and frustrated.
The good news is, these turn-offs are actually easy to avoid. Here are three things that you DON'T want to say to your audience – that is, unless your intention is to annoy, frustrate or irritate them:
1. “If I can do it, so can you.”
We all have struggles in our lives, we all have our unique life story, our motivations, and our challenges. For you to say that because YOU did something meaningful automatically means that I could do the same implies that your struggle has been harder than mine. How can you say that if you don’t know me? How can you say that even if you DO know me?
I understand that this sentence is loaded with good intentions, and it’s meant to be inspirational.
But it isn’t.
By all means, share your story, share how you overcame your struggles, make it really relevant to your audience, but don’t tell me that I can — or should — do something simply because you did.
2. “But that’s a WHOLE other story that I’m not going to get into right now.”
Then why are you bringing it up? And what if it’s the best story EVER? Now I need to know!
The problem with this statement is that as soon as you tell me that you’re specifically NOT going to tell me a particular story, I want to hear it. I really, really want to hear it.
And once that decision has been made in my head, instead of listening to you, I’ll be thinking, “I wonder why won’t she tell us.” After that inner-dialogue starts, you’ve lost my attention, and it will likely take a few extra minutes — or longer — to re-engage in your presentation. If I re-engage at all.
A speaking coach I worked with once said, “Don’t give your audience an off-ramp.” Basically, don’t give them an opportunity to disengage from your topic and distract them from your main point. If YOU stay focused on your main point, so will your audience.
3. “Looks like we’re running out of time. Can you guys stay a little longer?”
No, I cannot stay longer. And I’m really annoyed that you even asked.
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A few years ago I attended a marketing workshop that promised to leave me with a number of extremely useful and relevant ways to grow my business. The workshop was meant to be 4 hours long, and it wasn’t cheap, but I decided to make the investment because of the outcomes that were promised.
The speaker presented some content, and then proceeded to spend almost 3 hours answering audience questions. Focused and targeted questions, but still....not part of the promised content.
Around 15 minutes from the end time, when we were only halfway through the material, the speaker then asked “Does anyone have to leave exactly at 5:00 p.m.? Sorry we went over, but there was a lot of discussion among us, and I think that discussion and answering your questions is so much more important than going through the content.”
Um, no it’s not.
What’s important is delivering what you said you would deliver.
So some of us who had to leave at the pre-arranged time were going to miss out on some of the important information that we paid all this money to learn, and we would get penalized because of your poor time management?
It was the speaker who decided the length of this workshop, so why didn’t she just plan for it to be longer so then at least we could have planned accordingly?
Grr.
A later start-time, allowing for audience discussion, or telling “one more story” does not mean that you can single-handedly decide to change the end time of your presentation. Ending on time is critical to keeping the respect and goodwill of your audience.
Indeed, giving a presentation is a huge responsibility. Part of that responsibility is sharing valuable content that is meaningful and relevant to your audience.
The other responsibility is choosing your words carefully, so that there are no distractions or irritations that keep your audience from leaving your presentation anything but informed, intrigued, and inspired.
My mission is to shatter the illusions surrounding money, in order to break its hold on people.
1 年3. The statement “Looks like we’re running out of time. Can you guys stay a little longer?” is actually direct, honest, straightforwardly acknowledges the time constraint and asks for an extension, showing transparency. It also shows importance: Asking attendees to stay longer implies the discussion or event is significant and requires further attention. It further respects the participant - giving them the option to continue if they feel the discussion is worth extending. Notwithstanding the above rationale, it also puts pressure on participants: It might make attendees feel obliged to stay, even if they have other commitments or are uncomfortable. It is a potential disruption: Not all participants might be able to stay longer, leading to disruptions or incomplete discussions. Most importantly, it clearly demonstrates the speaker's lack of preparedness, experience, and considerations of the participants and their sponsors. Bad form!
My mission is to shatter the illusions surrounding money, in order to break its hold on people.
1 年2. The statement "But that’s a WHOLE other story that I’m not going to get into right now" is commonly used in conversations to acknowledge that there's more to a topic than what has been presented, but the speaker is choosing not to delve into it at that moment. While there are some "pros" as a tactic, the "cons" easily overshadow their use. Pros Certainly! Here's a condensed version: - Brevity & Focus: The statement communicates more depth to a topic without digression, keeping the conversation on track. - Builds Intrigue: It piques the listener's curiosity, potentially leading to further discussions later. - Conserves Time & Allows for Preparation: The speaker can avoid lengthy or sensitive details, conserving energy and allowing for better timing. Cons - Frustration & Perceived Evasion: Listeners might feel unsatisfied or believe the speaker is avoiding the topic. - Interrupts Flow: Acknowledging another story can disrupt the current discussion. - Potential Misunderstandings: Without full context, listeners might make assumptions, leading to misconceptions.
My mission is to shatter the illusions surrounding money, in order to break its hold on people.
1 年Hmmm...you got me thinking. 1. The goal should be to honour individual experiences while still offering encouragement. Here are some alternatives that are more inclusive and acknowledge individual differences: "Our stories might differ, but the spirit of perseverance is universal." "We all have our own paths and strengths. Find yours and embrace it." "My experience might be different from yours, but I trust in your potential."
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1 年Suzannah Baum Bad opening lines include, “Sorry for starting three hours late. I slept in by mistake.”
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1 年I've been focusing a lot on the third one and I think I'm pretty good at that, now. The first one irks me to no end. But that's always been the hallmark of "motivational speaking." Interesting to hear from a seasoned professional that it's not as inspirational as the speaker might think. As for the second one... guilty as charged! WHen I say it, it's often more as a humorous aside more than anything else. But I can see how it can become a distraction for the audience. I'll watch myself. ?? Thanks for the tips Suzannah.