3 Things You Can Do to Help Your Teenager Avoid Imposter Syndrome

3 Things You Can Do to Help Your Teenager Avoid Imposter Syndrome

Think back. Remember yourself as a child. Did you ever have a time when you felt sad and alone? Like you didn't fit in anywhere? Like you couldn't do anything right?

This sounds like a pretty normal childhood. Everyone goes through these feelings at some point or another. Believe it or not, this is a form of Imposter Syndrome, and it’s no fun no matter what age you experience it.

Now imagine your child going through this same series of emotions.?

As a parent, our first instinct is always to protect our children, or at the very least help them through the difficult bits somehow. The nice thing about Imposter Syndrome is there are things you can do to prevent it. It's all a matter of having some intentionality in your parenting to help set up your child for success.

Ask Questions…and Listen

Every parent needs to have a solid understanding of their child. You start by observing. What kinds of things are they naturally good at? Now, What would they say if you?asked?them what they're good at? What things do they find difficult? These are such important questions as it helps to get your child thinking. We're not talking about convincing your child they can do anything. Realistically this isn't the case, as everyone has areas where they struggle. This conversation is more about helping your child to see they have some really interesting skills. It's also about knowing where they need the most encouragement.

Create New Standards

There is nothing more awful to a child than a parent who demands the impossible. Unfortunately, every time we ask a child to do something 'right,' this is exactly what we're doing. Even when things need to be done in certain ways, having a culture in your household that builds an expectation of perfection is incredibly damaging. In such a world, there is never room for mistakes. Nor are efforts ever rewarded. This is where it's time for you as a parent to ease off. Create a policy where something really can be "good enough," and mistakes are allowed to happen. And as always, praise their best efforts at every opportunity.

Teach Kids to Fail

Speaking of mistakes, what's your attitude when your child messes up? This is a trick question. It's not your attitude toward their mistakes that is important here, as most parents are already pretty understanding when kids goof up. It's yours. Children watch to see how you react to disaster. If you beat yourself up for mistakes, pout, get angry, or blame others, guess how they're going to deal with it? So, where mistakes are concerned, it's especially important to cut yourself some slack as well. Let them know it's okay when things go wrong, even in your world, and that there are always lessons to be learned.