3 Things my 27-year-old Daughter Taught Me about Life while Sheltering in Place Together
J. Ilyse Craft(SuperCoach)
A professional certified Coach who creates sustainable lasting change| Inspiring personal freedom , inner peace, power & love
Us. Her.
This time together has been tremendous, incredible, healing & transformative.
As a single mom, I traveled often, came home late, still worked at night, was often distracted & stressed.
I was all the other things too. I showed up, was classroom & later, when Jess was in high school on the cheerleading squad, I was the Cheer Mom too. I "provided" a great life and went the extra mile as often as I could.
But I know... I know that I had a lot on my heart & mind.
I’m just being real.
I’m 57 now and my Daughter Jess is 27.
She lives 40 miles from me, but when the sh*t hit the fan, she first stayed with a friend because she had a cough and the thought of getting me sick was more than she could handle.
She moved into my 1-bedroom condo, which if you knew our whole history, you’d ask, "Are you sure about this?"
Listen, I don’t know what it’s like to home-school & I don’t know what it’s like to home-school & work at the same time and be worried sick about an invisible enemy. But I do know about the wasted time that you don’t get back. And I do know about healing.
I do know about repair. I do know about the second & third chances. I do know about that. I do know that if you haven’t gotten it right & there is love present you have a shot.
"I do know that if you can stay in the discomfort with the feelings that arise, they will flee and peace will come.
And healing enters."
I have learned more from being with my daughter in these 4 months than I could have ever imagined. I’ve distilled it down to my favorite top 3 because the list is long.
Here goes!
1. She prayed while I slayed
Observing her various practices, as her Mother, is one of the most beautiful things to witness. She has cultivated a relationship with her higher power, prays, does yoga, meditates, uses crystals, pulls cards, burns candles, and incense.
She asked if she could convert one nightstand into an alter as we made my space our space. As she prayed, I worked and together we found a rhythm that brought harmony to the home we now share.
I’ve come to know that she has always belonged to “He” and not me. I had that confused. We think our kids are "ours", at least I did. #perspective
I've learned what was, was. For her. And for me, and what will be is whatever we decide.
2. There is Infinite Abundance: aka Top Rated Cheese
Jess does the grocery shopping so there is less of a chance of me being exposed to the virus. Returning from the market, she proudly announced she bought us the top-rated cheese in the world!
I’m intrigued by how she decided to purchase that over other less expensive cheese and asked if she looked at the price.
She said, "Yes, it was only $10!”
You see, she was laid off but that happened outside of her and has nothing to do with her. She hasn’t internalized it as part of her identity. She isn’t “less than” because she was laid off.
Having had my own life experience with employment ending, and knowing the emotional toll this can take on others who have gone through this, I marveled at her inner wisdom.
Jess is fully trusting she will always be provided for and there is abundance everywhere.
3. Everything is Possible
I’ve been “politically correct” for so long, I had to re-learn what it means to be fully expressed.
In the front door of my condo walks my daughter, who is teaching me how to “tell it like it is” in the most loving way, with as few words as possible, truth intact, which defines our healing journey.
As kids, we learn to play well with others in the sand-box, then move onto the grown-up sand-box called "the job" where oftentimes you zip it & follow the rules of whose ever in charge.
Being the CEO of my On-Line Life & Business Coaching company, I co-create the culture of my company, get to surround myself with amazing people & have incredible support.
Being in a small space together, she has watched me step powerfully into large investments, scale my business, and sees how I show up with ease, joy & grace. We also laugh, dance, and "play", much like we did, in our own made-up language, when she was little.
When I share with her that a Client just joined me in a contract, her answer is always, “Of course they did.” She expects the Universe to deliver.
I’m aware this time is full of despair and difficulty. I’ve known many people who have lost loved ones, and I have cried many tears, while others have thought “it’s not such a big deal.”
It’s a big deal.
This is shaping up to be one of the most transformative periods of my lifetime.
What about you? Have you done any repair work? Sometimes you just don’t know where to start.
It may be too personal to share - or maybe not?
I know I’ve asked myself some of the deepest and hardest questions about the life I’ve been living, the choices I've made and the life I will choose to live moving forward.
It has been top of mind for almost every Client (and the person I speak to) so if you've been asking yourself these questions, you're not alone!
If you want help crafting a life & business from desire, we can do that from anywhere in the whole wide world.
Finding me is easy!
With love,
Ilyse
Fastest way to connect with me is in Messenger or here on LinkedIn or On Facebook in Messenger. I took my website down as well as my calendar as an experiment to see what was actually "needed" to have a thriving On-Line business.
Reach out to find out how that went. To reach me via email: [email protected]
Find me on Facebook here:https://www.facebook.com/itsilysecraft/
Realtor?| SRF Consulting and Real Estate #02033807 l Buy Sell Invest l The ONE Luxury Properties |CEO Stacey Rhoads Sales, Inc.
4 年Your experience with your daughter is inspiring and incredible. Her belief to be positive and strong when needed most, to put the faith in knowing she will be guided and provided for is dynamic. Believing is everything in manifesting your destiny.?? love this!
Realtor?| SRF Consulting and Real Estate #02033807 l Buy Sell Invest l The ONE Luxury Properties |CEO Stacey Rhoads Sales, Inc.
4 年I absolutely love this! Strong Mothers tend to produce strong daughters in my opinion. Emotionally, spiritually or mentally strong...You may produce secure and confident extroverted personalities or the introverts that possess inner strength to power up when the sh*t hits the fan! Either way, we somehow, directly or indirectly, created those incredible people to be our voice of reason and strength when we fall off our path or lose sight of our dreams and goals. When we as mothers have lost our path or been too heavily tainted by the world and it’s expectations.... it sometimes takes one of your own to remind you of what we instilled in them personally. Whether or not we knew we were molding these beautiful women, we hopefully did. I am grateful for moments like this. The realization that if you are fortunate enough to put out into the world our very own sources of spiritual guidance... you have been truly blessed. I am grateful for my daughter who reminds me of myself, when it matters the most. Witnessing firsthand and with daily affirmations, my daughter simply states that “Everything happens for a reason” and “Never say Never! Anything is possible if you believe and work hard enough!” Stay focused, passionate and determined!
Scaling operations and culture sustainably with intentional business owners | Operational fluency | Mindset and Solutions Strategist, Speaker
4 年What an amazing article - you've mastered the gift of truthtelling through stories of reality...and your story reflects a truth in each of our own. Thank you for writing this!