3 Things I Didn't Need To Hear When Parenting OCD
Julie Derrick
Childhood OCD : I help parents and schools figure out ways to support a child with OCD and anxiety??The Mind Monsters Books ???? The Parenting OCD in Teens and Tweens Handbook
3 Things I Didn't Need To Hear When Parenting OCD
As if parenting a teen with OCD wasn't challenging (and isolating) enough, the 'helpful' comments come from people who probably mean well but have the opposite effect.
Here are three examples of comments that secretly really annoyed me.
1."Look at her. She's such a diva. I would never do that."
This remark was made by a fellow school mum on watching my daughter sitting in the back of the car, being 'chauffered' around by yours truly.
Apparently, I was a mug, and my daughter was a 'lady muck.'
This person didn't know that hidden behind the smile painted on my daughter's face was a massive fear of becoming 'contaminated' as OCD had convinced her that sitting in that seat posed a 'risk'.
Or that this was part of her exposure therapy and was causing extreme anxiety for my daughter and a lot of pressure and strain on me.
2. "Why have you left your art folder in school...again?"
My daughter's teacher made this one due to my daughter continuously 'forgetting' to take her art folder home.
She was leaving it there deliberately.
School was considered highly 'contaminated and some classrooms more than others...the art one included.
Bringing the art folder home was a big no-no as it would 'contaminate' the whole house.
It sounds crazy to others, but OCD can be very skilled in convincing highly intelligent children that the threat is real.
Remarks like these have a knock-on effect at home as children come home even more anxious, leading to even more compulsions.
3. "It's just an age thing...she'll probably grow out of it."
This remark got to me the most.
领英推荐
A close family member made it and, again, probably made it with the best intentions, but it was not helpful.
Despite my attempt to educate this person, he continued to repeat this statement.
OCD sadly does not get better with age.
The opposite applies.
CAMHS informed us that if OCD reaches adulthood, it becomes almost impossible to treat as, by that time, it has been a part of that person's life for so long.
We were reassured that despite our daughter being very ill with OCD, it was good that we had caught it in her teenage years, as it was still treatable.
The only way for OCD to get better with age is by challenging it and doing the opposite of what it wants. This is achieved through ERP (exposure and response prevention) therapy.
It's what we used, and it worked.
But by creating a plan...and sticking to it through thick and thin, we eventually got there.
I am now on a mission to help other parents struggling to get through parenting a child or teen through OCD.
I do this through my:
Further details can be found on my website by clicking the link below.
Parenting & Family Communication Coach | DISC Personality Insights for Parents & Educators | Speaker & Author | Family Advocate
1 年So much of what you share applies to many different situations parents encounter. Thank you for sharing and educating others on the particulars of parenting OCD.
The Parent GPS ?? Navigate Your Kid's Future Success ??Discover Their Constellation of Gifts
1 年We are all learning so much from your insightful posts! Julie Derrick
Computer Software Professional
1 年Happy Good Friday!