3 Steps To Eradicate Fear

The very first time I faced death, it wasn't my own. I was only 6 or 7; my parents had taken my sister and me to Toronto to visit our family for the summer. While the neighbor and I played in the garden, he fell into the swimming pool and began to drown. I didn't think twice; I just jumped in and got him out. I wasn't brave; I merely did what I had to do. But this soon changed after I understood he could have died. It's not difficult to see how at that age confronting death could leave an impression.

In my case, it wasn't a negative impression. I had questions I didn't even know how to ask.

Upon our return to Mexico City, I began to study martial arts. I soon was exposed to oriental disciplines based on philosophies which I could not understand at that age. But I recall my sensei told me that to be a warrior I had to accept death. Little did I know this phrase would guide me to a path of confrontation with fear, which is necessary to eradicate it. In reading Miyamoto Musashi, I came to the understanding of the inevitability of mortality and the needed acceptance of it to be able to act and think strategically.

Throughout my life, I have come close to death a few times. In these instances, I have learned from and reflected on fear. Here are the three steps to eradicate fear I have found to work time and again.

1. Breathe

When we breathe slowly and intentionally, we become more self-aware, and our mental focus centers in the present. The key to this is in the exhale, which needs to be slower than the inhale. When we exhale we expel acidity and fat from our body as it is carried out by carbon dioxide. It is in the exhale where we rest and digest or enter our parasympathetic system. By being present and by being in the parasympathetic system we are not producing stress hormones nor focusing in the future, which is where fear resides.

2. Do things with intentionality

Being intentional in the things we do brings us to a closer understanding of who we are. When done correctly, we become aware of our movement, of the space we occupy and of the causes and effects of our actions and choices. We live present in our own lives, and when we do this, fear does not even enter our mind.

3. Learn how to become more objective

No matter how bad a situation may be. No matter how much you scream, cry, complain, or get angry at it, it will not care. The situation doesn't feel, hear, think, and it absolutely doesn't care about you. Look at the situation, do your best to extract yourself from the equation and you will find yourself in a more objective position from where you can now observe.

Once you can do these three things, you will find fear suddenly becomes smaller as you get closer to it. You will not eliminate all fear from your life, nor would you want to. But you will become more secure in yourself, and you will know how to encounter situations which you usually encounter fear, in a much calmer way.