3 Reflections on Accepting Recognition

These are a few reflections after receiving a humbling recognition on the eve of my departure from the role of CEO of Classroom Champions. If you're not on my newsletter mailing list then you can read about it here: Big News: Gratefulness, Awareness, and a Life Transition.

Yesterday, I was in the capital city of Ottawa where this kid from the City of Buffalo, New York, proud member of #TeamUSA, and citizen of the City of Calgary received the Meritorious Service Medal decoration from Canada's Governor General, Mary May Simon O.C., O.Q., LL D. (Hon.). This is the Government of Canada's second-highest civilian award. It was awarded to my sister Dr. Leigh Mesler Parise and I for the work Classroom Champions and the incredible people who work there have done to support children, teachers, Indigenous communities, and schools across Canada.

Three reflections from the day...

Accepting Recognition

First, it's always been hard for me to allow myself to bask in recognition. It's taken me time to appreciate it for what it is, not deflect it (too much), and allow myself to respect the decision-makers enough to reflect on why that recognition is being given. I'm finding the development of this skill - accepting recognition - really healthy for me, personally, regardless of my first instinct to avoid "gloating" or anything of the like. How other people choose to see me through this is becoming less and less relevant to me - which in of itself is a skill worth developing.

Feeling Grateful

Second, honing this personal skill has allowed me to experience a formerly very foreign feeling of "gratitude" in a truly authentic way. If you're like me and deflect credit or recognition, then your baseline feeling is "what have I accomplished that I can feel gratitude for?” since you don’t let recognizing yourself inside of you anyway? Further, what experiences or people would you appreciate if you don’t think you’ve done anything that deserves recognition either to yourself or others??

I do think this is how a lot of strong leaders and A-type personalities become greatly misunderstood. I’ve written a bit about this before in Why you’ll be misunderstood — and that’s OK.

The skill of being able to drop that barrier and allow me to own my accomplishments and the work behind them has been an anxiety-clearing exercise for me. The result isn’t that I’m more arrogant about my accomplishments, but rather I’m more humble and grateful for what my life has been about.?

We are who we think we are

Third, and this will likely take a moment to set up my point, in June of 2010, just four months post-Olympic Gold, my childhood friend Sam Sellers asked me "what does it feel like to have written the first line of your Obituary at age 31?" As many who read my writings know, this shook me and became a defining moment of what I thought was possible for the next 31+ years of my life.

It is immensely special to me to receive a significant award such as this that? has nothing to do with my athletic ability. For so long and starting from the age of around 15, I had to fight the stereotype of a "dumb jock" - largely from external forces but eventually those external forces also made me question if I was any more than what others thought of me.

From almost failing out of my first year at University of Florida as a scholarship track athlete pursuing a Pre-Med degree (where I? was encouraged to study to “become a gym teacher” since no one wanted my eligibility hurt and everyone was pretty certain I could pass that); to exiting Olympic sport at age 31 with zero real-world job experience; to growing through and despite the generally incredibly disrespectful treatment given to athletes on the United States Olympic & Paralympic Committee Board of Directors - I’ve had to prove my non-athletic ability time and time again to others and to myself.?

I'm not complaining. I understand why I had to prove my non-athlete ability, just like I had to prove my athletic ability time and time again on the field of play. It's how meritocracies work. It's the combination of self-doubt, actual minimal experience, and disrespectful treatment that made it a steep mountain that I'm glad I've climbed.

And it’s what makes this award from the Government of Canada so meaningful to me. It proved to me yet again that with the right mindset, the right ownership and accountability of our flaws, and the right emphasis on our strengths, we're ALL capable of rising as high as we want to go, and doing whatever we want in this one life we have. The overwhelming recognition for accomplishments I've been fortunate enough to have in my life came from running or pushing or sledding down mountains. They’re physical feats that I'm incredibly proud of, and they’re hyper-rare and unique, but they also always felt one-dimensional.

This award reminds me that high performance and mindset transcend single dimensions of life when applied thoughtfully and cultivated over time.

Lean into getting better and ask yourself every day - am I better today than yesterday, and what am I willing to do to ensure I'm better tomorrow than I am today?

Thank you Jay King for submitting Leigh and I for this, thank you to my incredible partner in crime who deserves this award just as much as I do, Dr. Rhiannon Mesler, PhD, and thank you to everyone who said I could and to everyone who said I couldn't do everything I've done in this life so far. Both of your sentiments helped more than you know in helping me form the mindset that allows for everything to be possible.