3 MINDSET HACKS THAT WILL HELP YOU FORM ROCK-SOLID NEW HABITS (OR EVEN KEEP THAT NEW YEAR’S RESOLUTION…)

Maybe you made a new year’s resolution, maybe you didn’t.

Maybe you are struggling to keep it, or maybe it’s already gone.

Maybe you’ve just started a new diet, or maybe it’s a fitness regime.

Maybe you’ve not made any changes to your life recently.

Whatever your situation is, at some point you’re going to make life changes that will require self-discipline to keep. In these cases, the success comes from building new habits. Habits are what make us who we are. The things we do consistently, without much thought or effort to do so, make up the bulk of our behaviour.

There is a quote attributed to Aristotle that illustrates this perfectly:

“We are what we do repeatedly. Excellence, then, is not an act, but a habit.”

There’s some debate over whether he actually said this, but whoever did has summed it up beautifully. When we want to make improvements and develop, we need to form new habits.

So, in order to help you form yours, here are 3 mindset hacks that can help you maintain that discipline, and turn a new ‘thing’ into a new habit.

#1 – Say ‘I Want To’ not ‘I Have To’

Motivation leaves us when we feel we are being forced to do something we don’t want to do. Think back to when you were at school. How hard was it to get out of bed on a Monday morning? Dragging yourself out of bed to catch the bus seemed almost impossible. Yet magically, on Saturday everything was so easy. The tiredness had shifted! Until Monday of course.

The reason for this is mindset.

On Monday morning, the mindset was ‘I Have to go to school’.

On Saturday morning, the mindset was ‘I Want to go to the park/play video games/play football’.

The second you feel like you are being forced to do something, it becomes harder. This is crucial when it comes to new habits. The way we frame that new habit in our mind is the difference between success and failure. Let’s put it into practice…

If you have just started a new fitness and diet regime, this is how you could re-frame it in your head.

Instead of saying…

‘I Have to eat this salad because it’s part of the new diet’

You could say…

‘I Want to eat this salad because it’s going to help me lose weight and gain confidence’

Instead of saying…

‘I Have to go to the gym this morning because my trainer told me to’

You could say…

‘I Want to go to the gym this morning because I want to be fitter, and I know I’ll feel great afterwards’

 Of the two possible phrases, which is more empowering? Which is more positive? And which is most likely to motivate you to keep the habit up?

I want to… Of course.

So, whatever the new habit is you’re trying to start, do everything you can to frame it as something you Want to do. This shouldn’t just be self-talk either. You should frame it this way whenever you talk about it to anyone. It reminds you why you wanted to start this new habit, and will keep you in a positive mindset about it. Saying I Want To is the quickest and easiest way to maintain your motivation to keep a new habit.

#2 – Keep the future vision in the front of your mind

If you’re trying to form a new habit, you’ve looked at your life and seen an area that you want to improve in. This means that you have imagined a future where you are already that person. In essence, you have chosen a future life that you want to make real.

Again, if we take the health and fitness route, you have looked into the future and imagined a reality where you are fitter, healthier, sharper, more awake and have complete clarity. It’s a great future! This vision of the future is so strong, and so powerful that it has convinced you to try to start a new habit.

Yet, sometimes, when we start building our new habit, we completely forget about this vision. Instead, this future vision is replaced by present struggle and suffering.

Instead of enjoying your lunchtime salad, and thinking positively about your future life, and your future vision, you sit there, not enjoying your salad, convincing yourself that you’re still very hungry, and salivating over a potential trip to Five Guys. Contrary to much mindfulness advice, often when you’re trying to form a new habit, being entirely present in the moment isn’t a great idea. Instead, immerse yourself in your future vision. This will remind you why you decided to start this habit, and will give you what you need to continue with it.

#3 – Don’t be so hard on yourself

We all fail. There is no one on the planet that hasn’t failed at some point in their career. In fact failure is a good thing. Failure makes us stronger, more informed and less likely to do so again in the future.

Yet, often, as soon as someone puts a foot wrong in trying to create a new habit, they give up. If you give in and grab a Five Guys for lunch, it’s OK. If you reject the gym for a week because you had a heavy weekend, don’t worry. One slip-up doesn’t mean you need to give up.

If you slip up, the first thing to do is forgive yourself. Then look at what made it happen. What were your triggers that made up slip up? Make a note of these, and beware of them happening again. The important thing when you slip up is to use what you learn to make it less likely to happen again.

This point isn’t an excuse to consistently slip up, if you do that, you’ll never build a new habit. However, it’s here to encourage you that if you slip up once or twice, that’s no excuse to chuck it all away.

The important thing to remember when trying to make changes in your life is WHY. Why have you decided to make that change? If you keep this firmly in your mind, and the answer is strong enough, then any struggle along the way will seem insignificant.

All of the 3 points above are simply ways of remembering the WHY. If your WHY isn’t strong enough, or you don’t care enough, there are no hacks that can help – the habit is doomed from the start.

However, with a strong and meaningful WHY, the possibilities of what you can achieve are genuinely endless.