The 3 Life-Changing Pillars That Gave Me an “Unfair Advantage” Over 90% of People

We all want that "edge" in life, the kind of insight that changes everything, allowing us to tackle challenges with clarity and confidence.

I used to feel like I was running through life on autopilot, feeling not in control of my own destiny, resigned and thinking that was just the way it was.

But over time, I discovered three foundational pillars that radically shifted my approach to life: self-awareness, a growth mindset, and self-compassion and acceptance.

These three concepts have become the core of how I navigate the world, and they’ve given me what feels like an "unfair advantage" over the 90% of people who struggle without them.

Here’s what they’ve done for me and what they could do for you.

1. Self-Awareness: Knowing Yourself as Your Best Strategy

Self-awareness is the foundation of personal growth, yet many people never tap into it. Self-awareness is about understanding your strengths, weaknesses, habits, values, and triggers. It’s about getting to know the “real you,” beyond the expectations of others and the automatic roles we often slip into, it's about shedding layers of conditioning.

Before I embraced self-awareness, I often acted out of habit or followed others' agenda, ignoring my own instincts and values. Over time, though, I began to pay attention to my inner voice, noticing what lit me up and what drained me. By tuning into my thoughts, emotions, and behaviors, I started making decisions that aligned with my true self.

When you truly understand yourself, you stop living reactively. You start making choices that reflect who you are and who you want to be, leading to more authentic relationships, healthier boundaries, and a clearer sense of purpose.

2. Growth Mindset: The Belief in Your Potential to Change

One of the most profound shifts in my life came when I embraced a growth mindset—the belief that I could change, improve, and become the person I aspired to be. For years, I felt stuck, held back by a fear of failure and the belief that I wasn’t "capable enough." Then I learned about the power of a growth mindset: the idea that talents and abilities can be developed through effort, learning, and perseverance.

With this shift in mindset, I started setting goals, taking risks, and seeing mistakes as opportunities for growth. Suddenly, failures weren’t reasons to give up; they were valuable lessons. Adopting a growth mindset allowed me to stretch beyond my comfort zone and opened up new possibilities I’d never thought achievable.

This mindset is an “unfair advantage” because it empowers you to move past your perceived limits. Where others see walls, you start to see stepping stones.

3. Self-Compassion and Acceptance: The Freedom of Being Kind to Yourself

It’s easy to be hard on ourselves—many people struggle with an inner critic that judges every move, every mistake. For me, self-compassion was the last and hardest pillar to adopt, but it has been the most freeing.

Self-compassion is the practice of treating yourself with kindness and understanding, especially during times of failure or self-doubt. Acceptance goes hand-in-hand with this; it’s about recognizing where you are in life without constant judgment.

When I started to practice self-compassion, I noticed a shift. I no longer spiraled into negative thoughts when things didn’t go as planned. I began to treat myself with the same kindness I’d offer a friend. Over time, this helped me build resilience. I could face setbacks and challenges without crumbling or losing my confidence.

Most people fight themselves rather than support themselves. Self-compassion gives you the "unfair advantage" of being on your own side, no matter what happens. Instead of fighting or hating some parts of you that you judge wrong and wish to go away, you welcome, embrace and thank them even. The magic words are curiosity, calmness and openness.

I helped myself and my clients to overcome resistance and self sabotage by going through this process, we all had some great shifts.

Why These Pillars Matter and How They Give You an Edge

Most people go through life without these guiding principles, reacting rather than acting, judging themselves instead of growing.

But when you combine self-awareness, a growth mindset, and self-compassion, you set yourself apart. You gain a sense of inner strength that allows you to tackle challenges head-on, learn from every experience, and treat yourself with care. This combination becomes your "unfair advantage," enabling you to thrive where others may falter.

These pillars aren’t magic tricks; they’re skills you can build. The results may not appear overnight, but the changes compound, gradually transforming how you see yourself and interact with the world.

If there’s one thing I hope you take away from my journey, it’s this: life doesn’t have to feel like a struggle. By embracing these three pillars, you can create your own path, guided by authenticity, resilience, and self-kindness.

It might just become your “unfair advantage” too. ;-)

Here to support you each step of the way.

Anna Amoroso

Transformational coach.

Hi I'm Anna, I'm passionate about helping women go for their dreams, find their freedom, independence, fulfilment and meaning in this lifetime.

If you are done with waiting for the "right" moment to change your circumstances, for that "right" moment that might never come, and instead take your life into your own hands, start living your best life by giving yourself permission to express your full potential, then reach out!

I'm excited to support you through the challenges and empower you throughout your amazing journey ahead!??

For enquiries on working one-on-one with me write to [email protected]