3 Leadership Traits You’re Overlooking (And Why They Matter)

Over the years, I’ve read countless leadership and self-help books, each with its own insights and advice. But after diving into over 100 different perspectives, I've noticed that some ideas contradict one another, and a few behavioral attributes seem a bit too idealistic. So, instead of following every single piece of advice, I’ve focused on the practical lessons I've learned through experience. And from my journey, I believe these three leadership attributes can make a huge difference in anyone’s career.

1) Breathe

It sounds simple, right? But it’s incredibly powerful, especially in challenging situations. How often have you found yourself reacting immediately, wanting to respond to a question or comment without taking a moment to breathe? I know I have. Sometimes we rush to answer, especially when we feel threatened or misunderstood, and that can lead to saying things we regret.

One of the most important things I've learned as a leader is to pause and breathe before responding, especially in stressful moments. This is crucial whether you're facing a senior leader's question or navigating a difficult discussion with peers or team members. Taking a breath gives you a moment to collect your thoughts and respond with clarity. In a toxic environment where colleagues often tried to provoke emotional reactions. At first, you might feel the urge to snap back. But with breathing—just stepping back for a moment—allowed the tension to pass and will help you maintain your composure. It will save relationships in the long run and will give you the space to think before reacting.

2) Believe in Yourself and Stay True to Your Values

No one is perfect, and it’s easy to let others’ opinions or judgments shake your confidence. As a female leader, I’ve often faced situations where people point out things I’m not doing "right" or compare my efforts to others, especially to highlight my perceived shortcomings. At work, I’ve been criticized for trying new approaches or challenging the status quo. But despite these challenges, I have stayed focused on my core values and that has guided me through tough times.

It’s important to define your values early on and revisit them periodically. Whether it's empathy, honesty, or transparency, these values will guide your decisions and actions. Yes, there will always be people who try to point out what you’re doing wrong, but don’t let that derail you. When faced with tough decisions, I often remind myself to pause, reflect on my values, and act according to them, even if it doesn’t lead to immediate benefits. This is especially important in the corporate world, where short-term decisions can sometimes conflict with long-term integrity.

Remember: Don’t compromise your values for short-term gains. I’ve seen people make decisions during reorganizations or when they’re trying to keep their jobs, only to regret it later when their reputation suffers. The corporate world is small, and in today’s age of social media, it’s easy for reputation to spread fast—both the good and the bad.

3) Ask for Help

One of the hardest lessons for many leaders, especially those climbing the corporate ladder, is the importance of asking for help. As you rise in your career, it can feel lonely at the top. You're afraid of being judged or seen as weak. But the truth is, asking for help is a strength, not a weakness.

Over the years, I've been amazed by how many people are willing to help when I simply ask. It’s not about seeking a promotion or a better position; it’s about reaching out for genuine advice or guidance. I remember during a time when I was struggling with whether to stand firm on my values in a patriarchal environment, I reached out to colleagues who had been through similar experiences. Their advice was invaluable and gave me the clarity I needed to move forward.

I've also benefited from coaching, especially in my previous company, where I attended leadership programs in Paris. Having a coach who was there to guide me at every stage of my career helped me grow both personally and professionally. I’ve recommended this approach to a few colleagues, and they’ve thanked me for the opportunity to learn from those coaches.

And here's the thing: asking for help shows humility and vulnerability, which actually builds more trust and respect from those around you. Research shows that leaders who show humility are more relatable, trustworthy, and successful. So, if you value humility and authenticity, asking for help is a natural extension of those principles. I’ve also noticed that women leaders at the top are always willing to help because they understand the struggles we face. Strong women lift each other up—it’s something I’ve seen firsthand, and it’s a powerful truth.

In Conclusion

In leadership, it’s easy to get lost in all the theories and advice out there. But after years of experience, I’ve come to believe that breathing, believing in yourself and your values, and asking for help are the three key behaviors that will guide you through any leadership challenge. These are practical, human-centered qualities that don’t just make you a better leader—they make you a better person. So, take a deep breath, stay true to what matters most to you, and don’t be afraid to reach out when you need support. Trust me, it will pay off.