The 3-foot world
Nicholas Long
Service-oriented leader dedicated to engaging, educating, and empowering the leaders in us all.
In these turbulent times, stress amongst individuals takes on a whole new level. Numerous studies and polls have found that Americans are experiencing considerable stress related to the coronavirus and are reporting higher levels of general stress than in previous years. Several months ago, I wrote an article about bearing. A leader needs to be sure that they present themselves as able to control their stress and emotions. Leaders that react emotionally to?stressful events can add to people’s stress and anxiety. Therefore, this article is about how to manage your emotions when you are feeling overwhelmed and like things are feeling like they are out of control.
I should remind you, that even though I do have advanced degrees in psychology, I am not a licensed clinical psychologist. What I am is an experienced combat operator with extensive education in workplace stress and motivational theories. If you are feeling overwhelmed and hopeless, I strongly recommend reaching out to a licensed mental health professional or trained member of the clergy that can give you the tools you need. It took me a long time to realize there is no weakness in seeking help with mental health. At the end of this article, I will provide some sources that you can reach out to. What I am offering here is just one tool for getting through the day-to-day stress that can overwhelm us all, especially during these times. Here I present just one method of dealing with overwhelming situations so that you can carry on your mission and lead your team successfully.
In the words of the great Rocky Balboa, “Let me tell you something you already know. The world ain’t all sunshine and rainbows. It’s a very mean and nasty place and I don’t care how tough you are it will beat you to your knees and keep you there permanently if you let it. You, me, or nobody is gonna hit as hard as life.”
This can be hard enough for most people to handle on their own. It’s even harder when you have people counting on you. We’ve heard it our whole lives, “life is not fair.” It is full of challenges and hurdles that you must get through. When you dwell on those challenges and hurdles and the “what abouts” you have let life win. The sooner you realize that the struggles are part of life, the sooner you can focus your efforts on overcoming them. When I was going through combat training many years ago, I was taught about the concept of staying in your 3-foot world. No, I’m not talking about social distancing protocols.
What does it mean to stay in your 3-foot world? It means that you focus on controlling the space 3 feet around you in any direction. Don’t worry what may or may not be beyond that 3-foot sphere or what could go wrong in the long term. This principle is talked about significantly in the book "No Hero” by legendary Navy Seal, Mark Owen as a follow-on to his bestselling book “No Easy Day”. One of my specialties in the Marine Corps was close quarters battle (CQB) and urban combat (It occurs to me that a future article on applying some of the basic principles of CQB to modern business may be beneficial). In this environment there are so many things that could take your attention away. You have things going on all over that could distract your attention. When you enter a room, you focus on what is in that room and the immediate threat. Don’t worry about what might be in the next room until the time comes.
When I went through the rappel tower training and later went to mountain warfare training in the mountains of northern California, I struggled at first. I’ll tell you a secret. I have a fear of heights. But when it came time to go down that wall or go up that mountain, the advice I was given by my instructors draws back to the idea of the 3-foot world. Don’t focus on how far you could fall. Don’t focus on who’s at the top. Focus only on where you are, what is around your immediate vicinity, and your next step. Everything else is a distraction.
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You may remember an article I wrote back in October on Endurance. In the article I mention a quote by Former American diplomat George F. Kennan, who once famously said "Heroism is endurance for one more moment."?This is the same concept. You stay in your 3-foot world, focus on what is directly around you and endure for one more moment. There are things that matter and things that you can control. If an obstacle doesn’t fit in both of those categories, then it is outside of your 3-foot world. Don’t focus on anything outside of your 3-foot world. If something is weighing on you and overwhelming you, ask yourself “is this important?” and “can I do anything about it?” if you can’t answer yes to both of those questions, then focus your attention on something else what you can control.
Does this make the stress go away? Of course not! What it will do is take away all the distractions in your peripherals. By focusing on what is immediately in your 3-foot sphere, the challenges become less intimidating, less overwhelming.
So, this is it. This is the big secret to leading through adversity. Stay in your 3-foot world! Don’t worry about who’s at the top or how far you can fall. Focus your energy on what you can control and what matters at that moment.?
If you would like to seek telehealth counseling services, check out this site for a list of available services.
If you are in a crisis: