3 controversial reasons ‘work-life’ balance is a simplistic myth

The quotations we hear like: ‘You work to live, not live to work’ are, of course true.

Sometimes.

If you're in a rinse/repeat job where it's purely a box-ticking exercise each day, or purely data entry, then yes, switch off entirely outside of work. Because you’re not contributing anything more.

But there must be more to life than that?!

Those who are truly chasing a passion, have an outrageous goal to create something or impact more than their own sphere, operate differently. If you’re not working towards your passion, start finding out how here…

So why is work/life balance a myth?

1. Work is PART of life!

Do you walk differently when you leave the office? Can you speak 7 languages in work but suddenly lose your translation abilities when you get on the train home…? Do you totally stop thinking about your sick family member when you switch on your laptop? Of course not. Work affects our home life, and life impacts our work. Because we’re human and we carry the same brain around with us all the time.

Our brains have the capacity to juggle many things at once. In the same way that it’s impossible to get an annoying tune out of our head (useless trivia: that’s called an Earworm), it’s impossible to suddenly STOP THINKING about either our work or home life.

Is it realistic to think we can flip a switch and stop thinking as soon as we leave the office building? What happens if you work flexible hours or freelance? If you have a fantastic idea whilst out for a long country walk, should you ignore it because it's not ‘work time'? Or does it make sense to whip out your phone and jot down the idea…?

2. We’re all different

I don’t think we can create a single blanket formula to calculate the ratio of ‘work’ and ‘non-work’ time we should have. How can we, if we’re all different, continuously evolving and changing how we think and communicate?

Someone, somewhere decided that we should work 40 hours every week in the UK (if you know why then let me know - I’m fascinated to know where that number came from…). Sweden recently dabbled with the idea of 6 hour days instead (30 hr weeks) but it turns out it's too expensive and many companies have scrapped it. And some reckon a 3-hour day would be better instead… So no one's got it sussed yet.

Before I left my full-time job, I was told time and again that I needed to address my work-life balance, that I needed to switch off (yet I needed to be less ‘black and white' about things… all very confusing!).

Honestly? I like working incredibly hard when I'm learning, engaged and feel fulfilled. Yes, I'm a control freak and like to know what’s going on with everything, so it's hard not to check emails out of hours.

But is it fundamentally wrong to read research books in our free time, or watch TED Talks, or to be on LinkedIn on a Sunday reading articles that expand our thinking…?

The times I felt burned out and unhappy were when I was EXPECTED to work out of hours.

Choosing to work long hours on something you enjoy is very different to being forced to work long hours because of an unmanageable workload or lack of resources...

We know that some of us can concentrate for long periods of time, with laser-like focus. But others like to work in short bursts. Some work well late at night, or in the mornings, or suddenly wake up on a Sunday morning with a flash of inspiration and rattle out the best work they've done in a long time.

Are any of these right or wrong...?

3. ‘Work-life balance’ isn’t the real reason you’re unhappy

Hours spent working hard aren’t the cause of burnout and stress.

The real causes are working hard without achieving anything, unrealistic pressures, unreasonable expectations, your working environment and company culture.

You might only work 30 hours each week. But if you dread going into work because of hostility, harassment or undue pressure, then your ‘work’ will negatively impact nearly every aspect of your ‘life’.

You’re not entitled to a ‘work-life balance’. You’re entitled to do whatever you like! If you decide that working screamingly hard for a few years with extra hours while chasing a goal, then do it. But there's gotta be light at the end of the tunnel.

Yes, we need to make sure we take time off to do what we enjoy. It's healthy to challenge our brains in a different way to the interactions we have at work.

But instead of beating yourselves up about whether you have ‘the perfect work-life balance’, surely it's better to find out what feels right for you personally ? Don't put even more pressure on yourself to be perfect in that area of your life too.

If you sleep well, have time now and again to step back and relax - whatever relaxation means to you - then you're winning.

Ignore what others say about whether you have a ‘balanced’ life.

Do what feels good for you, and just be yourself.