2,708 WEEKS...AND COUNTING

Next week I will be 52. So, with 52 weeks in the year (plus the odd day), that will be 2,730 weeks. And by my calculations, 18,993 days since I was born in Clifton, Bristol to Vivien and Alan.

I am currently re-reading Four Thousand Weeks by Oliver Burkeman, which is an excellent exploration of the tyrannical relationship many of us have with the concept of time. Well, in the spirit of pausing and reflecting (which I like to do often), I’ve felt inspired to write 52 nuggets that capture how I currently see myself, life and the world. I’m sure I could keep going, but for now, it’s one thought or idea for every year I’ve been circling around the sun.

And in the spirit of Daniel Pink, I write this not because I’ve worked it out but to help me work it out and to remind myself. Forever a work in progress.

1. There will never be enough time to do, create or experience everything I want to in life. So, with that, it’s a simple matter of prioritising and focusing on what is truly most important.

2. The sense of satisfaction from achieving a goal, reaching a milestone or obtaining a shiny new thing will always be fleeting. The fun part IS the journey and BEING satisfaction itself. Exporting one’s happiness to the future makes no logical sense.

3. Being Joy, creates the possibility of experiencing joy, even in the most mundane of tasks.

4. One thoughtful gesture, one random act of kindness, can make someone’s day.

5. Being in service of something greater than one’s self is an expression of purpose.

6. Being honest with ourselves is a daily practice: our capacity for self-deception is ever present, and when we hold ourselves to account and commit to being someone of integrity, we get nearer to living an authentic life.

7. There’s far less in our control than our mind would have us believe. Making peace with the living truth of this can be liberating.

8. In the words of George Pransky, ‘the trick in life is to be grateful for the highs and graceful in the lows.? Remembering this when at either the top of the rollercoaster helps us maintain humility and seeing it at the bottom of the rollercoaster allows our innate resilience to do its work of lifting us up.

9. Nothing outside of us can directly cause our experience. We are also living in the feeling of our thinking. But the cosmic joke is that even the more enlightened of us forget this many, many times every day. The illusion is that deceptive.

10. Health is everything, but we often only remember this when we have lost it in some way.

11. In the casino of life, we’re playing with the house’s money.

12. When we judge others, there is always something for us to learn about ourselves.

13. We will forever have blinds pots (what others see in us that we cannot). These blind spots can be the great, the good, the bad and the ugly in us.

14. The past does not have to define us, but it’s so easy for our mind to trick us into believing it does.

15. We are all one thought away from a completely new experience.

16. The best way to create the future, is from the future, not from the past.

17. Carrying resentment and bitterness is a huge burden. Time to let go, however hard or difficult that may feel.

18. Most of us spend way too much time on social media. Me included. This creates distractibility and makes it harder to mono-task and focus. Sometimes I long for the pre-internet age.

19. I love my job as a coach. But I’m conscious that not everyone loves their job. That sucks, and I’ll keep doing my thing, helping one person at a time.

20. Coaching skills should be taught to every manager in the world. Just imagine the difference it would make. Many people don’t leave their jobs because of the job; they leave them because of their manager.

21. Listening is a skill and an art, and I know I can continue to become so much better at it.

22. Friendship is everything.

23. Life is always ready to throw us a curveball or a new challenge. This does not have to derail us, it’s simply the Universe’s way of asking something new of us.

24. Showing appreciation and acknowledging others is much underrated.

25. Receiving an acknowledgement or words of appreciation is like receiving a gift. And how do we sometimes act? We brush it off, or worse, dismiss it. Would you do that with a birthday present?

26. Humility is not thinking less of yourself, it’s thinking of yourself less (C.S. Lewis). The more preoccupied we are with ourselves, the less we are truly living.

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27. People will forget what you said or did, but they will never forget how you made them feel (Maya Angelou). Writing this made me think that this has a downside too! BE kind. Always. And when you’re not, clean it up.

28. When feeling stuck or overwhelmed, the smallest action can make the biggest difference.

29. Getting started is often the biggest hurdle.

30. There is a gift and opportunity in every situation, but it might not be immediately apparent or may take some time to be revealed.

31. If the one thing people learned was not to be afraid of their experience, that alone would change the world (Sydney Banks). We frighten ourselves with our thinking and forget that we are the thinker. The scariest thoughts are often the most compelling and thus are those we should be least trusting of.

32. There is a short life to enthusiasm. Had an insight, good idea or moment of clarity? Act on it. NOW.

33. Asking for help is a sign of strength. How do you feel when someone asks you for your support with something? Humans love to give.

34. When we are struggling with something or not making progress, the most challenging question we can ask ourselves is: ‘What am I making more important?’ The answer can reveal the inner racket we are playing (e.g. comfort, staying safe, keeping the peace).

35. Relationships in any context thrive on open communication and co-creating clear agreements. And those agreements need to be reviewed and updated regularly. ?

36. Success is what we define it as. That is our right. What is most important to us and how we want to live is the starting point.

37. The need to belong, fit in or be accepted by others is a very human trait, but when overplayed, it means we give our power and happiness away.

38. Our thoughts create our reality. We can never directly experience the reality we perceive as being ‘out there’, its only ever a projection of our own minds. So, when we bump up against something in life that unsettles us, the first place to look is our own minds and what is being created from within.

39. We all live in separate realities. I cannot have your experience and you cannot have mine. Remembering this fact can help us navigate the complexities and intricacies of human dynamics.

40. Every cell in our body is listening in on our thoughts (Deepak Chopra). Creating an inner environment of healthy thoughts is good for mind, body and spirit.

41. Our feelings are only ever telling us about the current state of our minds, not what is going on in the outside world.

42. There’s always a choice in how we respond, it’s just that we frequently forget this and get caught out, reacting to life from memory.

43. Even a five-minute PAUSE, to stop, gather our thoughts, and take a breath, can change the course of our day.

44. The intellect is a wonderful servant and a terrible master. But we frequently reverse those roles. Asking ourselves this can help: is my mind serving me right now, or is it hurting me?

45. Championing, celebrating and cheerleading those we care about is remarkably easy to do and is a win-win situation.

46. We are creatures of habit. Want to make a change in your life? Start small and manageable, remove friction and see it as a game.

47. All we are is peace, love and wisdom, and the power to create the illusion that we are not (Jack Pransky). I love this quote; it captures so much about who we are at our core versus what our minds would often have us believe.

48. Humans evolved with rituals and practices. Individual and collective. I love ritualising the start of my day with activities that are an end in themselves (e.g. yoga, meditation, breathwork, writing, walking in nature). What are the rituals and practices in your life that help you to be present and to stay centred?

49. There is no ‘there’ out there in the future (see No. 2 and the I’ll be happy when trap), life is only ever happening now. Best make the most of it.

50. Commitment is everything; it can help us achieve miracles, move mountains and create what might seem impossible.

51. You can have anything you want; you just have to actually want it (and variations on this theme).

52. Talking to your pets is completely acceptable; they’re full of wisdom.

You made it this far! Well, I thought I would save the best til the last. Thank you for reading.