[27] Unawakened Dream of Hell?

One-Line Summary: The story you tell yourself about who you are and what you can do, is the dream ruling your life.

One Paragraph Summary

Following our brain development during our childhood as well as during our teens, we build habits to deal with our environment. These habits can be actions, such as getting angry or defensive when receiving feedback, or thoughts, such as “I am not good enough”, “I don’t have a good memory”, “I don’t deserve it”, etc. Those beliefs about our identity, are the ones that most limit our potential, and they were built in the past. Becoming aware of those is the first step to overcoming those lies, then we need action. Accountability, that we indeed, are capable of changing our past identity, if we take responsibility and built systems and habits that are in line with whom we want to become.

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“We never had the opportunity to choose what to believe or what not to believe”

(Ruiz, 1997)

We all have been “victims” of a “domestication” process, with a dream or story that includes all of society’s rules, its beliefs, its laws, its religions, its different cultures and ways to be, its governments, schools, social events, and holidays (Ruiz, 1997).

Adults around us hooked our attention and put information into our minds through repetition (Ruiz, 1997).

As children, we didn’t have the opportunity to choose our beliefs, but we agreed with the information that was passed to us (Ruiz, 1997). Well, we did not have any choice to rebel really, since we were fully dependent on others.

So in order to fit in, we conform.

The problem is that as soon as we agree, we believe it, and this is called faith. To have faith is to believe unconditionally. And as you know, children believe everything adults say (Ruiz, 1997).

It′s like Christmas and Santa. We have been told a fantasy story that we believed firmly in and never questioned it.

That is what Don Miguel Ruiz call the “Domestication of Humans”. Through this domestication, we learn how to live and how to dream (Ruiz, 1997).

We become a COPY of Mamma’s beliefs, Daddy’s beliefs, society’s beliefs, and religion’s beliefs (Ruiz, 1997).

This belief system is like a Book of Law that Rules our Mind. Whatever that book tells us is the TRUTH (Ruiz, 1997).

Then, we all have an Inner Judge that implements this Book of Law by judging everything! What we do and don’t do, everything we think and don’t think, and everything we feel and don’t feel (Ruiz, 1997).

And there is another part of us that receives the judgments, the Victim. The Victim carries the blame, the guilt, and the shame. It says: “Poor me, I’m not good enough, I’m not intelligent enough, I’m not attractive enough, I’m not worthy of love, poor me.” (Ruiz, 1997).

That′s why, we suffer because we believe all these lies, ending up…

“living in a dream of hell” (Ruiz, 1997)

You may be wondering why we keep believing something that is harming us?

It′s mainly because of two fears:

• Fear of the Unknown: If we are not this victim, Who we are? – We′ll need to face the reality and take responsibility. We are not children anymore, we are free to create our own destiny. So getting out of the comfort zone and discover how we really are is scary as we don′t know what we are going to face.
• Fear of Rejection: All these beliefs and behaviours were taught to us so we were accepted, valued and loved. If we didn’t do as we were told, we ended up in trouble. So if we become our true self, Will anyone love us?

The answer is YES!

“What the world needs is people who have come alive.” - Howard Thurman

If you want to live a life of joy and fulfillment, you have to find the COURAGE to break those beliefs that are fear-based and claim your personal power (Ruiz, 1997).

How? – Few tips:

• Red Flags ?? those beliefs when they come to you and understand their roots. Then look for exceptions, when you did have a good memory, when you were fit, etc. Then, once you believe profoundly that you can change, make an action plan, commit to it and make it a habit.
• Let go. The past, your experiences, your traumas don′t define who you are now or who you can become. Forgive, let go and embrace change.
• Focus on the process, not the outcome. Enjoy the journey as much as the result you are hoping to get or expect. Getting in the rhythm of small wins and celebrations is a great way to keep you motivated and focused. Let go the expectations.
• Be patient. Many beliefs and opinions about yourself were “imposed” to you by repetition during many years, it takes time and practice to do things differently and to start feeling and being different.
• Don’t quit! – Please! ??- Just keep going. “Fake it till you become it” (Cuddy, 2012)

Action + Mindset can create new neuropathways that with repetition will get stronger, like physical training and muscles.

Repetition makes the master. And remember:

The best investment you can make is in yourself.

And the world needs you!

References and/or Recommended Resources:

• Cuddy, A. (2012). Your body language may shape who you are. https://www.ted.com/talks/amy_cuddy_your_body_language_may_shape_who_you_are
• Ruiz, D. M. (1997). The Four Agreements: A Practical Guide to Personal Freedom. Amber-Allen Publishing.
• Solids, L. and. (2022, September 21). What Does It Mean When You Dream Of Hell? (10 Spiritual Meanings). Liquids and Solids. https://www.liquidsandsolids.com/dreams-of-hell/

Credit to: John Spence for recently recommending the book of 4 Agreements and also to Gustavo Escobar Henríquez for the same recommendation. Very simple, short and powerful book. Many thanks!