25 Things I've Learned in 25 Years

As I prepare to blow out the candles on a drool-worthy caramel cake, I thought why not first take to the keyboard and screen for a little reflection.

Today, September 7, I celebrate my 25th year here. It's my 25th circle around the sun and on this exciting yet sometimes challenging journey.

These 25 years have been filled with so much. Thousands of wonderful memories and experiences, as well as several handfuls of not so wonderful moments.

The first 18 years were extremely challenging - mentally, emotionally and physically. However, after 20, things began to click and make more sense.

In the 5 years since turning 20, I've - slowly - metamorphized into more of the person I craved to be all those years. However, growth is never complete. Growth is neverending, and, I suppose, that's the first lesson in my "25 Things I've Learned in 25 Years" list.

1. Growth is neverending. You will always be changing. You can fight it, but it will happen anyways. Let go and let it be. You will be who you are meant to be someday.
2. Relationships - personal or romantic - should never emotionally or physically harm you. It's far better to be alone than to be with someone who doesn't value you. Everyone is valuable and everyone deserves to be treated with love and respect.
3. Kindness is the best virtue to have. It's never too late to become kinder. The world needs more kindness. It can be as simple as a smile or helping someone in need. You never know whose life you could change.
4. Never take advantage of your health. Only once it's gone do you realize how much you took advantage of it. Practice drinking more water, eating healthier and moving your body so you don't end up wishing you could someday.
5. Working hard in your 20s may feel lonely and "uncool" but it will pay off. You'll be able to enjoy life later. Of course, have fun but remember that these are the golden years to become who you want to be.
6. Making friends as an adult is challenging. Not impossible but much harder than before. Remember it's okay to not have dozens of friends. It's far better to have a few good friends than dozens of friends who wouldn't bat an eyelash if you were in trouble.
7. Take care of your skin. This goes for both men and women! Taking proper care of your skin is so important and it will show down the road. Washing your face, drinking enough water and practicing proper caution in the sun will only benefit you later on.
8. Don't waste your life online. Yeah, I know, as I write this on LinkedIn. Remember that life exists out there, not on here or any of the other dozens of social media platforms readily available to us today.
9. Learn the art of saving. Saving money (regardless of your income) will put you so far ahead in life. Start as young as you can and teach your children the importance of saving - even if it's just a few cents or a few dollars a month.
10. Keep learning. Just because you completed school doesn't mean the learning should stop. Aim to read 5-20 books a year, take classes online (Udemy has sales where courses are 10 euros!) and read articles or case studies. Keep your mind young as you go through life by feeding it new and important information.
11. Think about the big picture. We hear about "living in the moment" and yes, I agree that it's important but don't forget that your actions in the moment shape your future. Think about what you are doing now and how it will impact your near and far future.
12. Remember that anyone who treats you unfairly is likely suffering. While the common reaction is to lash out or get angry, try practicing some compassion. You may be surprised how quickly they change their attitude towards you.
13. We are all humans living a temporary life here on Earth. The minor details that make us unique are not meant to fuel hatred and anger. We all feel the same emotions, experience life and face challenges. We are all one.
14. Take care of your mental health. Just as everyone must take care of their physical health, so should they take care of their mental health. There is no shame in feeling not "okay" - it's okay to not be okay. If you feel you may be slipping, consider visiting a therapist or working with a coach. If your finances prevent you from this, there are a number of initiatives that can (and will) help, as well as hotlines you can call from anywhere in the world at any time. Reach out and speak to someone here on LinkedIn (myself included). There are ALWAYS people ready to help you.
15. Prioritize sleep. What's worse than financial debt? Sleep debt. Lack of sleep can literally kill you and it will affect all areas of your life. If you can, aim to sleep between 6-9 hours per night and establish a sleep routine.
16. The things that mattered so much at one time will be a distant memory someday. That relationship, that friendship, that gossip or drama - all of it will be irrelevant in several weeks, months or years. The famous "ask yourself if it will matter in 5 years" is what I mean. If it won't matter in the near future, leave it behind. It doesn't serve you - it only distracts you.
17. There will be people who tell you that your dreams are too big or that you "can't do that." They are wrong. Whether it's coming from a place of jealousy, fear or anger that they were not able to achieve what they wanted in life, don't listen. Keep pushing and going towards your dreams, no matter how wild they may be.
18. Having a hobby that doesn't involve work, alcohol, drugs or something else harmful will bring so much joy to your life. It could be writing, hiking, biking, doing yoga, reading - you name it.
19. Be mindful of what the content you consume. These days we are bombarded with so much information, much of which happens to be negative, and it can really impact your mental and emotional health. When you read something that doesn't sit well with you, move on and consider removing this person or outlet that fuels negativity. Life is too short to constantly dwell on the negative. There will always be negativity in this world but there will also always be positivity. It just depends on which you will choose to focus on.
20. School is not for everyone. There. I said it. As we go further down the digital age rabbit hole, traditional ways of schooling are changing. Just because you went to school, doesn't mean so and so has to. Yes, some professions do require schooling but others do not (necessarily). Everyone is free to live their lives as they please and sometimes that means not going to school to focus on other things.
21. No matter how hard someone tries to convince you, no one is perfect. Not a single person is perfect. We ALL have flaws and we all have imperfections. Just because you have a flaw doesn't mean you are broken. In fact, it makes you unique. If the flaw bothers you, see how you can work on it and grow.
22. You are not your parents. Many of us grew up in toxic homes with toxic parents who had toxic relationships. We believe this is how life must be and we carry this toxicity with us through life. We suffer because we believe that is how life must be. It's not. You are not your parents. You and your partner are not them. Your relationships (platonic or romantic) do not need to be toxic. You CAN be a healthy person with healthy relationships despite growing up in a toxic environment. It just takes time and work. You can do it.
23. Everyone starts at the bottom. Okay, must of us do. Just because you are working as an assistant now doesn't mean you won't get to where you want to be. It takes time and dedication. Instant gratification doesn't work in real life. Only on social media, and it's temporary. It's always temporary.
24. Start now. Tomorrow is never guaranteed. Whatever it is you wish to do in life, start today. You can take baby steps. After all, that is how you learned how to walk and eventually run.
25. Practice gratitude. You are alive and reading this. You are so much better off than you know. Wherever you are or whatever you are going through. Simply being alive and being able to breathe on your own is a wonderful gift.

Of course, there are many more things I could write but these are several of the most important lessons I've learned. What lessons have you learned so far in life? If you also have a birthday today, let me know in the comments below so we can share some birthday cheer!