24th January- For preoccupied people

FOR PREOCCUPIED PEOPLE?

..."A psychologist was developing a group session when he suddenly raised a glass of water. Everyone expected the typical question: "Is it half full or half empty?"?

However, he asked:

– How much does this glass weigh?

Responses ranged from 200 to 250 grams. The psychologist replied:?

– Absolute weight is not essential. It depends on how long I hold it. If I hold it for a minute, it won't pose a problem, but if I hold it for an hour, my arm will hurt. If I hold it one day, my arm will become numb and paralyzed. The weight of the glass has not changed; it is always the same. But the longer I hold it, the heavier and more challenging it becomes to bear".?

This story reminds us that worries, negative thoughts, grudges, and resentment are like that glass of water; If we think about them for a while, nothing happens. If we think about them all day, they start to hurt. And if we think about them throughout the week, we will feel paralyzed and unable to do anything.?

Learn to let go, accept and let go of what hurts you.?

Worrying constantly (that tireless voice of daily thoughts and ruminations) is exhausting and stressful.

Sometimes we think these voices are inevitable, that they are "who we are," or a "flaw" we have.

But it's not true. The problem is not the thoughts we have, but how we handle our thoughts.

We burn out when we don't know how to handle our minds.

The problem is that when our mind is busy taking care of all our concerns, it loses the valuable energy needed to properly function our executive functions and our emotional management. Ultimately, we have an exhausted brain for working on irrelevant things and absent for the relevant ones.

Distractions, productivity problems, lack of sleep, meaningless awakenings, and irritability are all stress symbols.

And they all mean that we have held our thoughts too long.?

There is a phrase by William James that I like a lot:

"The ability to voluntarily regain vagabond attention, again and again, is the very root of judgment, character, and will. No one owns himself if there is no owner. An education that enhances this ability would be an education for excellence."?-William James?

What this phrase comes to tell us is that motivation, won't last forever. When we start a job or something that we are passionate about (a new habit, a routine) the excitement of the beginning won't last long.

But the excitement fades; even judgment itself sometimes fades depending on how tired we are. That is why it is so important to understand that our brain is not only tired by the constant thoughts it endures, but also by the emotional and natural exhaustion of work or effort.

Being aware of this, we must save as much energy as possible and redirect our negative thoughts to more functional and positive ones that help us face our daily difficulties.

Recurring, obsessive, negative, or circular thoughts come and go. But if we insist on eliminating them, if we keep grasping them, if we keep paying attention to them, they will weigh on us more and more.

A very simple exercise that you can do is to see your thoughts as clouds in the sky. If you look at the sky you will see that there are always clouds (or almost always), they come and go, and even when you only see clouds and the day is gray you know that the blue sky is behind all those clouds.

Observe your thoughts and watch them come and go. With this metaphor in mind, perhaps you can begin to be an observer of your thoughts and not a prisoner of them.

If you feel that your performance and your day-to-day are completely clouded by your thoughts, and you find it difficult to leave them aside, you can contact me and we will work together to learn to let go of that glass that weighs you down so much right now and enhance the blue sky behind it from the clouds. I will be happy to accompany you. You can request your free appointment here.

References

Kabat-Zinn, J. (1990). “Full Catastropher Living: Using the Wisdom of Your Body and Mind to Face Stress.” Pain and Illness, Delacorte, NY.

Kabat-Zinn, J. (2010). La práctica de la atención plena. Editorial Kairós.

Kabat-Zinn, J. (2003). “Mindfulness-based interventions in context: past, present, and future.” Clinical Psychology: Science & Practice 10(2): 144-156.

Khoury, B., Lecomte, T., & Fortin, G. MINDFULNESS CONCIENCIA PLENA. Qué nos sirve el Mindfulness, P. Qué es el Mindfulness y sus beneficios para la salud.