24 Strengths to Change the World: A Blueprint for Human Leadership

This past week was tough, I'm not going to sugarcoat it. Every night, I would put my son to bed in his warm bed in his warm sheets, kissing him good night. In the mornings, we walked to school in the pouring rain, taking a break from public transport. He complained about the rain, not understanding why we had to walk.

The night before, I had seen two children drinking rainwater, thankful to have something to drink because their water was shut off. They had no electricity, no warm bed, no parents to comfort them. My son didn't quite grasp this as he continued to grumble.

But I was filled with feelings of guilt and shame. Guilt for still having my basic needs met and my human rights upheld.

Shame for the state of our collective humanity, that in today's world, acts of genocide, claimed in defense of an oppressed people, go unchecked.

Shame for government leaders choosing political correctness to maintain their comfortable positions, as money feeds their power.

Shame for the media that peddles fake or selective news to support a narrative that paints a barbaric picture of people, human beings like you and me, based on their skin color and where they come from.

Some might think this is a political post picking sides. It's not.

Rabbis, Jews and people of all faiths and backgrounds are joining in a global call for a ceasefire. All lives matter, on both sides.

There is no place for terrorism in this world, and we should condemn it with every cell in our body. And so should we condemn people with power in governments who retaliate without an ounce of humanity, and get away with it because of diplomatic ties and political support.

Today, I reflect on finding our humanity and rethinking the notion of leadership beyond the double standards.

Feeling shame, regret, or guilt is a good sign, it is a sign of our humanity. When we are able to feel, it means we are still capable of building a better world, choosing love over hate, reason over impulse, and courage over cowardice.

The moment we numb our feelings, turn a blind eye and think away the atrocities that are happening in a place far away, that's when we should be concerned about our humanity and what world we are leaving behind for our children.

No amount of theory or political commentary on just war principles, no amount of finger-pointing about who's right or wrong, and no amount of digging through history changes the fact that a population, children are being decimated for political power.

How did we get here?

This week, I've been crying, reflecting, feeling angry, frustrated, and unmotivated. But then I heard someone say that the most potent action against anger is to use pen and paper, your voice, and your heart.

We talk about a new type of leadership based on integrity and good human qualities.

But what does that mean, and to whom? Good and bad are subjective, depending on the mental model they fit.

It takes character to lead with integrity, and character can be built and taught.

The 24 universal character strengths that stand for human values are what every leader, influential business figure, parent, student, and citizen can work on to help create a better world—one where children aren't living in conditions that no one would call humane.

I thought long and hard before writing this post, as there are many emotionally charged opinions and hate around this conflict.

But a quote struck me deeply, and I choose to speak up from a place of unity and love. We are past the point of worrying about ruffling feathers or being politically incorrect.

"I am only one person, and what can I do?" said 7 billion people.

So here are my personal reminders based on the Values In Action Institute 24 Universal Character Strengths that make up for our humanity.

Navigating Challenges with Wisdom

Creativity: The ability to think of novel and productive ways to conceptualize and do things.

Every single human being has the ability to tap into their creativity and think of new ways, innovative ways to solve problems. Creativity helps us do what is right, not what is easy.

Curiosity: Taking an interest in ongoing experience for its own sake; finding subjects and topics fascinating.

Too often we jump to assumptions, judging others based on how we judge ourselves. Using bias is easy, thinking is difficult. Replace bias with curiosity, seek to understand before being understood and ask questions to open your mind.

Judgment: Thinking things through and examining them from all sides; not jumping to conclusions.

When our emotions run high and feel intense, that's when the use of judgment will serve us well. It helps us reflect before reacting, it helps to look at challenges and situations from a 360-degree and make informed decisions based on reason, not impulse.

Love of Learning: Mastering new skills, topics, and bodies of knowledge, whether on one's own or formally.

We live in an era where instant gratification, and the need for speed trumps our ability to learn new things, and enjoy the process of learning. When we come from a place of love of learning, the journey to acquire new skills is less of a struggle and more of a discovery.

Perspective: Being able to provide wise counsel to others; having ways of looking at the world that make sense to oneself and to other people.

There is nothing more dangerous in this world than to have people in power with a narrow-minded vision. We need more leaders who can take a step back, craft a vision that pulls people out of limited thinking and impulse reaction, through the tides of change and uncertainty and into a better desired outcome.

Stepping Up: The Role of Courage in Leadership

Bravery: Not shrinking from threat, challenge, difficulty, or pain; speaking up for what’s right even if there’s opposition.

Too often we are tempted to be held back by fear. Fear of feeling embarrassed, fear of what will people say, and fear of how we are being perceived. But on the other side of fear is courage, and it is courage that has the power to change the world. Your world, the world of those you love, and the world around you.

Perseverance: Finishing what one starts; persisting in a course of action despite obstacles.

We all love the quote "never give up!" Challenges are part of life, and you will be tempted to give up on your goals, living a life aligned with your values, and standing out from the crowd. It is perseverance that helps us fall down seven times and get back up eight. Every time we rise after we fall, we leave our doubts and fears behind on the bottom, where they belong.

Honesty: Speaking the truth and presenting oneself in a genuine way; being sincere, without pretense.

Studies have shown that when we lie, even if they are white lies, they cause internal conflict within our emotional being and can harm our cells in our body. We have been conditioned to lie since we were kids if those who raised us did not agree or like what they heard. Next time someone is being honest, don't judge but celebrate them because finding an honest person in today's age is like finding a gem. Be kind, and be honest.

Zest: Approaching life with excitement and energy; feeling alive and activated.

When we are beaten down by life, when we have nothing to show for and when we feel as if we don't matter, tap into your zest. If children who are witnessing bombing and their families being killed still go out on the street and smile - then that says it all.

Connecting Through Humanity: Leadership with Heart

Love: Valuing close relations with others, particularly those in which sharing and caring are reciprocated.

Love is not expressed in words alone, but in actions. Love is shown through how we show up for another, and how we show up for ourselves. The more we show up for ourselves, and feel the love within to heal our emotional issues, the more fulfilled we will be and the more love we can spread around the world. The more we help others without expecting anything in return, the more love we feel for humanity and the less inclined we will feel to turn our pain into suffering.

Kindness: Doing favors and good deeds for others; helping them; taking care of them.

If you can be anything in this world, be kind. Too many are struggling in silence, and your act of kindness can either make or break their day. Kindness is not the same as being nice. Being nice comes from a place of needing to be validated, while kindness comes from a place of character.

Social Intelligence: Being aware of the motives and feelings of other people and oneself.

This is what we need most in today's world, in leadership and personal development. To think and care about the impact of our actions on others, on our climate, and the world at large. Loving oneself without feeling love for others is the epitome of narcissism, and that's not the world we want to live in.

Unity and Equity: The Just Leader's Agenda

Teamwork: Working well as a member of a group or team; being loyal to the group.

I get it, we may go faster if we go alone. We may get instant results if we use fear to get others to comply. And we may feel more comfortable if we all agree. But trust me, we won't get far and we won't evolve as a collective humanity to match the rapid changes that are happening every day around us. We have to value community, teamwork, and our individuality within a collective in order to thrive, and not just survive.

Fairness: Treating all people the same according to notions of fairness and justice.

Even if life is unfair, even if most systems are rigged and corrupted, even if we have been thrown blow after blow, we cannot stop striving for a life of fairness for all. The moment we stop trying, is the moment we start losing our humanity and battle for equality in this world.

Leadership: Encouraging a group of which one is a member to get things done.

Leadership is a character strength that resides in each and every one of us. Don't confuse leadership with status or title, as many with titles have zero leadership skills. Leaders don't always choose to be leaders, but they choose to do what is right rather than what is easy and inspire others to do the same.

Steady at the Wheel: The Power of Self-Control

Forgiveness: Forgiving those who have done wrong; accepting the shortcomings of others.

The number one reason why acts of hatred, jealousy, and envy can cause irreversible harm to others, and to ourselves, is the feelings of resentment we carry within us. Forgiveness is not excusing bad behaviors. Forgiveness is permission to let go of the resentment, to learn from our experience and evolve in life. And the most important person you need to forgive is yourself first.

Humility: Letting one's accomplishments speak for themselves; not seeking the spotlight.

There is absolutely nothing wrong with celebrating one's achievements, milestones, and contributions to society. At the same time, a true leader with integrity is one who balances the art of humility to know that they are not better than anyone, and no one is better than them. We all go to the bathroom, if you are lucky. Many don't even have one.

Prudence: Being careful about one's choices; not taking undue risks.

I believe we should teach our kids to take risks in life, and to bet on themselves. Especially young girls as we grow up settling for so much less than what we deserve because of fear of risk and lack of emotional resilience to overcome our challenges. That said, risk-taking without balance is foolish. That's where prudence comes in, not to hold you back but to make you think before you act.

Self-Regulation: Regulating what one feels and does; being disciplined.

Not everything that glitters is gold, and not all of our emotions merit action. Intelligent people ignore. Powerful people stay calm. Don't confuse silence with weakness, as the beast within you is sleeping, not dead. Control your emotions, and no one will be able to manipulate you as you stand in your personal power.

Rising Above: Transcendent Leadership for Today"

Appreciation of Beauty & Excellence: Noticing and appreciating beauty, excellence, and/or skilled performance. If we wait to be happy only after achieving goals, changing relationship status, or improving our jobs, we'll be miserable in the pursuit of happiness. "Change the way you look at things and the things you look at change" (Wayne Dyer). Happiness isn't a thing; it's an attitude.

Gratitude: Being aware of and thankful for the good things that happen. Gratitude is the quickest route to love, magnetism, and happiness. Complaining only drains our energy. Feeling blessed for waking up, having basic needs met, and healthy children for example, is a choice between feeling victimized or blessed.

Hope: Expecting the best in the future and working to achieve it. No matter how tough life gets, never lose hope. It's our hope that sustains us, believing in future justice, better times ahead, and overcoming life's challenges.

Humor: Liking to laugh and tease; bringing smiles to other people. Bringing a smile to someone who's struggling is a human gift. Yet, don't mask your pain with humor; every life, including yours, matters.

Spirituality: Having coherent beliefs about the higher purpose and meaning of the universe. Spirituality is personal, beyond any clichéd expressions. It's the inner knowledge of a greater purpose, unseen but felt in the heart. Don't let societal norms belittle your inherent gifts.

To fully embrace these character strengths requires a continuous balancing act, as at times overusing honesty can get you into trouble, while underusing humility may keep you stuck. Practice, experience, and explore, as we all do the best with what we have. But we must continue to strive to do better, so what's happening today will never ever happen again.

Love, Nadja ?? ?? ??