2025: A Year to Drop Assumptions and Build Better Relationships

Let’s welcome 2025 with renewed energy and aspirations. It’s the perfect time to reflect on habits that may hold us back.

One common barrier to success and harmony is the trap of assumptions. It’s human nature to fill in the gaps when we don’t have all the facts.

However, in the workplace, where collaboration and trust are essential, assumptions can lead to misunderstandings, inefficiencies, and even fractured relationships.

Our unexamined assumptions act as invisible barriers to effective communication. Approaching situations with curiosity instead of certainty creates space for breakthrough moments.

Why Assumptions Are Problematic

Assumptions often stem from our subconscious biases, past experiences, or incomplete information. While they may feel like a shortcut to understanding, they frequently lead us down the wrong path. For example:

• Misinterpretation of Intentions: A manager assumes a team member’s silence during a meeting signifies disengagement when they’re carefully processing the information.
• Missed Opportunities: A colleague assumes another department isn’t interested in collaboration, overlooking a chance to create synergy and innovation.
• Erosion of Trust: Repeated misunderstandings can cause tension, making it harder to repair the relationship.

The Cost of Assumptions in the Workplace

Assumptions can be costly regarding productivity, morale, and financial outcomes. According to a Harvard Business Review study, teams that operate on unchallenged assumptions experience more conflict and are less likely to achieve their goals. Miscommunications can lead to costly errors, lost time, and diminished employee engagement.

Strategies to Overcome Assumptions

• Approach Situations with Curiosity. Cultivate a mindset of curiosity. Instead of jumping to conclusions, ask yourself, “What else could be true?” This opens the door to exploring alternative explanations and encourages dialogue.
• Question Your Reactions. When you notice an emotional response, pause and reflect. Are you reacting to the situation or a story you’ve constructed?
• Invite Different Perspectives. Actively seek out other viewpoints. Ask colleagues for their take on a situation or challenge. This can help you uncover blind spots and gain a fuller picture.

Stay Open to Being Wrong. Embrace humility. Recognize that your assumptions might not align with reality. Being open to correction fosters trust and collaboration.

The Power of “Tell Me More”

One simple yet transformative phrase can reshape your interactions: “Tell me more about that.” This invitation signals your willingness to listen and understand, disarming defensiveness and encouraging honest communication. For instance:

• When someone shares an idea that challenges the status quo, asking, “Tell me more about that,” demonstrates openness and respect.
• Using the phrase helps uncover underlying concerns and emotions that might otherwise remain hidden during a conflict.

Reflect and Share

• What assumptions have you held that changed after having an open conversation?
• Reflect on a time when “Tell me more” led to a breakthrough in understanding or problem-solving.
• Sharing your experiences can inspire others to challenge their assumptions and embrace curiosity.

Moving Forward

As we celebrate the arrival of 2025 ??, let’s embrace a fresh approach to communication and relationships. Dropping assumptions isn’t easy, but it’s worth it. By cultivating curiosity ??, questioning our reactions ???, and inviting diverse perspectives ??, we can create a workplace culture rooted in trust, respect, and innovation. The next time you’re tempted to fill in the blanks, pause and ask, “Tell me more.” You might just discover a solution you never imagined.

Dr. Debra Dupree, known as the MINDSET Doc, transforms challenging confrontations into learning conversations, taking the ‘sting’ out of conflict. She saw her own family-owned business embroiled in differences, leading to dashed dreams, damaged relationships, and broken hearts. She turned these early experiences into a lifeline for smart professionals by focusing on the brain science behind the blow-ups, emotional intensity, and negative reactions that fuel people in conflict. She transforms “fear of conflict into profit through peace.”

Dr. Debra is a Dispute Resolution Specialist, Conflict & Leadership Coach, and International Trainer & Keynote Speaker. For 20 years, she served as the Senior Mentor Mediator for the Department of Navy's Southwest Region, facilitating resolution of Title VII employment issues while training and supervising the professional development of internal mediators for the Navy. She also served as the Director of Training for the Mediation Training Institute for 10 years, designing and delivering conflict management programs and workplace mediator training throughout North America. She has over 30 years' experience developing conflict management systems, reasonable accommodation programs, and leadership development training for both the private- and public-sector.

She is an accomplished TEDx Red Carpet Speaker featuring “We’re Talking but Are We Communicating?” She is a frequent keynote speaker and workshop facilitator at local, regional and national conferences for lawyers and mediators, focusing on the psychological aspects of people in conflict. She serves on the Employment Mediation Panel for the American Arbitration Association and is a faculty member for advanced training for lawyers and mediators.

Dr. D is also the creator and host of two podcasts:

#1 ‘Decoding the Conflict Mindset’ designed for business leaders and dispute resolution professionals when high emotions run high and tough negotiations are at stake, and

#2 'Hot Topics in the Workplace: When Medical Conditions Flare Up' intended for professionals in the legal industry, risk management, and human resources, or anyone confronted with the challenges of medical conditions impacting employees' ability to 'be at work, stay at work, and perform the work' of their assigned jobs.

Debra is an active member of the ABA DR section and conference planning committee, an active member and former Board member for SCMA - SoCal Mediation Association, and a current Board member for KMC - Kids Managing Conflict, building conflict competency in tomorrow's leaders.

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