2021 Reflections

Over the last 4 years, I have collaborated with a team to put on a truly exciting and enlightening Goal Setting session. Every year, a new workbook was developed - refreshed content, broader and indeed braver offerings. Many a participant in the sessions was elated, excited, encouraged. Set on a path to blaze new trails in their personal circles of influence. And then Covid. And some more.

Every December, right after the festivities, I reflect on the year past, my own scribbles in my goals workbook and my aspirations for the new year. Also, I write them down - its my way of collective and public accountability on what I would like you to ask me about - this time next year. Today 28th Dec is the 52nd and last Tuesday of 2021. There's still a lot to do, Fifi's birthday not the least of them all.

Last year, I charged my listeners with MEASURING - as a way to see truly if the experience and the goal both generate the kind of growth they would like to see. As the last year came to a muted start, I believe I was a completely different person in a different space, mind, body and spirit from where I am today. I am grateful for life, and family, but also for meaningful work. I am grateful for impacting lives, making connections, and for learning so much more.

I could summarize #2021 in five words #Failure, #Faith, #Family, #Grace and #Gratitude

#Failure - They say leadership is lonely, at the top. I failed to gain the confidence of my team to lead them through a very turbulent time. Sometimes you see failure creep up on you, like a slippery slope. Other times you see it in the product of actions and reactions. I learned that good intentions are, unfortunately, not enough. I may have struck a chord with this team, built a foundation on which a terrific future can be built, but ultimately, when it mattered, I wasn't the one they stuck with to navigate the storm. More importantly, I was isolated, without any real friends in the room, no one to stand with me. Which brings me to...

#Faith - ... the substance (or assurance) of things hoped for, things unseen (and not yet received). Without faith, that life will work out, we could literary fly behind. From mundane tasks like the slow commute to work, functional stable internet, a pay check, to the grandiose - a livelier economy amidst the pandemic - nearly everything in 2021 became an act of faith. I faced a scary robbery, a betrayal, many dear deaths. All this stuff triggered pain, and deep moments of low-key depression. But also they helped re-shape my world view. And that started with...

#Family (and Friends) - Family has always been fundamental and a very basic ingredient to everything I do. They ground me, they also comfort me. So every day i was battered, I counted the blessing of family and friends who really knew me. Ever since my mother passed away, I hate death - and my friendships are built first on a foundation of a trusting relationship. They are sustained on this fuel. Not money, not charisma and certainly not charm. Trust. Trust, for me, applies to all relationships, intimate or otherwise, friendships and even my work. So nothing prepared me for the literal death of what i considered valuable friendships, when trust was broken. And nothing confirmed for me some of my existing relationships like the re-affirmation of trust. Letting go of people you had trusted with your life is a deeply painful thing - like death. However, the real work is in dealing with yourself - learning to let go, learning to forgive, learning to trust again.

#Grace (and Mercy) - Grace is defined as unmerited often divine assistance extended to someone for their regeneration (re-sanctification). We don't earn grace, it gets extended to us. Usually, we don't deserve it - and yet it comes to us, unconditionally. Mercy on the other hand is defined as the compassion (and/or forgiveness) shown towards us by someone whom it is in one's power to punish or harm us. Simply put, Mercy is when we don't get what we rightly deserve. At some point during the year, I had to confront my inner self, I was carrying so much pain and frustration around, the picture of a bitter version of myself getting all too familiar. I had to let it go. My healing had a lot to do with Grace and Mercy - understanding my power dynamic, my circle of (actionable) influence and a strong self awareness journey to accept, name and then release the pain (and associated people+experiences). 2021 was about me working on me. Only a better me can be of truly positive influence and service to the community around me. If you ever find yourself in this 'valley of the shadow of death', do remember there is grace and mercy. New every morning.

#Gratitude - In 2021, I thought the world would get better - not with all the vaccination drives, and massive equitable distribution campaigns. But lets face it, it was tough. I felt like I was perpetually holding on - to one successful step after another. One month down, the countdown was long and winding. I am grateful for many small little steps, one after another, within a disrupted environment. I am grateful that without clarity and confidence, without much assurance and certainty, there was life. When stuff is not going according to plan, give thanks. Hold on. Count ALL your blessings and take it one day at a time.

There are many life lessons from last year, but the more outstanding of them all is my experience in (with) startups. You know they say every business proposal is perfect - we break even in 1 or 2 years, we grow (even exponentially). Hire the best team, become rich in no time. Right?

The first job of any CEO is to secure the vision of the company - a long-term vision. You see it, and not everyone does, you constantly live in that future, so that when your troops are ripe and ready, you have a dream to walk them into. In 2018, it was about getting set up. In 2019, it was about delivering our MVP. In 2020 it was cash-flow. In 2021 it was diversification. Kaggwa was the first CPA to teach me the Finance for non-finance managers course, but the real life context when you are just budgeting for a team, vs when you are responsible for the livelihoods of a team (and their families) makes things very different. 2021 helped me see how the fragility of the early years of entrepreneurship can be shaped by a commitment to the vision, a clear definition of where we are going, and that I had to be there first before I could bring my team along.

The second job of any CEO is to hire a diverse team of high performers (well, and to keep them). There will be time for partnerships and relationships (people will see through genuine and manipulations, so don't even start). I have had the privilege to mentor and coach, and recruit young people. To hear them offer the early years of their career paths to your vision is such a burden of responsibility. I have called people into futures that I was just building - and they came. They trusted me. And everyday, I worked hard to repay that trust, not with a monthly token (although, that is important) but with a commitment that I will be there with them when the long nights come, and I will be there with them when the laptop screen go dark and life is what we must face. 2021 helped me reaffirm my commitment to people.

I went through some important lessons:

1. Make sure you have a solid pipeline - in partnerships development, we call it a funnel - you need to know where everyone is in your partnerships funnel. You need clients who believe in your work (ethic, skill and relationships) and are going (not just willing) to pay.
2. Define and constantly remind the team why you think you are doing meaningful work - and why it matters to keep doing this work - even if the micro-economy of your sub-sector remains in a pandemic driven drag. Find meaning.
3. Find clients for whom your skills and work experience builds the confidence for new work. To do this, invest in partner happiness. Invest time in learning who your clients are, so that you can solve their problems from a place of deep true knowledge.
4. Find it in you, to walk away from any job for which the person giving it to you expects a kickback. Because then, your merit is worthless, your skills and relationships and labor, all made out to be worth 30 pieces of silver.
5. Your net promoter score may be just a number, but you still need to find people who will open (or even kick) doors for you. Your promoters (not paid/salaried marketers) will carry your name in rooms where you will not be. They will seek out opportunities that advance your growth. Find, nurture and cultivate. Then deliver. And repeat.
6. Hire a diverse team of high performers. People who stand out. People who deliver consistently. If you are a CEO/Founder do one more thing: get out of their way. If they are not delivering, let them go - be sure to preserve their dignity, as they are not failure, they simply do not fit your team, for this season. Be sure that you have done everything in your power to grow and develop them. Only then will you be able to retain a relationship of mutual respect. Do good, and do right - by the people you are with today and tomorrow.

Some noteworthy stuff:

• I experienced an amazing Board Leadership class - serving on boards is about my time, treasure, talent and ties being made available to the mission of the organization.
• I participated in and led (alongside many partners and colleagues) a country while adoption of a national digital health system, and then studied the fundamentals of deploying national systems.
• I experienced a full year of not just #WorkFromHome but also #LearnFromHome for my little princesses.
• I had my first full pre-marital counseling experience, as a couple's counselor.
• I started an exciting youth skilling program.

I feel like this was a hard year for me. But I also feel that's exactly why there is a lot of #Gratitude. If you ask me, all the money in the world, and all the positive impact I could have - I would choose the latter. I do want to make money, alot of it, so I can be a blessing to others. The real nugget here, is how to be of impact to people even without money.

I do hope that as we all prepare to face 2022, we can count on Resilience and Recovery. I wonder if I could follow my December fitness with a 1000km challenge, and I wonder what it will take to start allover again.

What are your deepest reflections from 2021?