2020... in my country

A few months ago, I bought a place in South Florida in a relatively small and affluent community along the intracoastal. 

It was raining the whole day and I could not step outside. The rain finally relented at around 7pm. I got dressed and decided to go for a quick walk to get some fresh air and exercise. I left my house and turned into the next lane and started walking down the length. There were a couple of middle aged white families standing and chatting in the center of the lane. Suburbia - no traffic. I smiled to myself. As I got closer to the families, they all were staring at me. I was not sure if I was dressed inappropriately or something was funny about me. It is then that one of the ladies suddenly remarked, “Hi, you are not supposed to be here”.  I politely responded, ‘Excuse me, why is that so?”.  I could immediately sense a hint of surprise in her voice. But the next sentence from her took me by surprise. She said, “This is a private community. Your kind of people are not supposed to be here”. I responded, “What kind would that be? And since when did a road owned by the county become a private property?” 

The shock in her voice was obvious. Was it at the audacity that I had in challenging her? Or was it that I was literate and fluent in English? While she was trying to find words to respond with,  one of the men (husband?) jumped to her ‘rescue’. Sensing she had made an assumption without knowing the truth, he tried to salvage the situation but only made it worse. He said, “You know - she was referring to the ‘other’ kind of people”.  

That’s when it hit me, “OMG, they have not seen a brown skin Indian ethnic person in their community and immediately made assumption that I did not belong there and further that I was not literate and fluent in English. 

While I am used to ‘stare downs’ and ‘silent questions’ as I walk down the street over the last 30 years in many places around the country - I had not experienced such open discrimination. It would have been easy for me to look past an ignorant woman and her friends, like I have done 100s of times over the years. But I am not sure why - must be my ego - that got the better of me at that moment.

I looked at the man and the woman straight in their eyes and said, “This is America. It’s 2020. I have been an American for over 3 decades. (most of my life).  I might not be white in skin color. But I am every bit an American as all of you and damn proud of it! And BTW, I own the house on the water - yes the one that is at least 3 times as expensive as any of yours. So I will walk where I please.”

That night in bed, I reflected on the conversation and struggled with - Was I right in saying what I did? Should I have let my ego get the better of me?

While I enjoy a very successful professional career today, every day for the last three decades has been a fight to prove myself at 150% of any other white person at work. Mine is an ever told classic story of an young immigrant who studied hard, stayed in college and worked even harder at work. One who is extraordinarily thankful for what this country has given him - an opportunity to work hard and the success that comes with working 16hrs/day for 3 decades. From the board rooms that I am in - where the silent question is always asked, “Why is this brown skinned Indian computer programmer here?” to the “Oh Shit" moment (my name for it) when they realize that I am the boss and the buck stops with me and not with the other white men in the room. 

It’s 2020. And I still can’t walk out of my house all alone without being stared at like a tiger in a zoo. While this is not so obvious when my daughter is with me, there still is a question asked always - as to whether I belong in that community or have I come there to scout for what to pick up from the items that have been kept on the curb for bulk garbage pickup the next day. 

Over the years, I have tried to ignore such comments and stares for the most part - both in my personal and professional life. But, some days it gets too much and I crack and retort. For the first time, I am sharing this with the world - hoping that it helps at least a few people in making a conscious change to make  the world that much a better place.