Wendy's 2018 Soul Graffiti

Here’s my annual entry containing musings and observations, this time, as a reflection on the year that’s now past.

2018 was a tough year for me, both personally and professionally. But, through rejection, I learned reflection and, this discovery has provided me with an abundance of thoughts and ideas. Here’s a few things that spurred me on:

1.      I stopped being the Leader in a Jar. For years I donned a disguise, in conflict situations, that made me into the ‘leader in a jar’. Just uncap the lid and a loud, articulate, fearless (and deaf) leader would emerge to take over. This is not effective. It does not lead to success, it just makes everyone else go quiet.

 2.      I found my inner Leprechaun.  Instead of disappearing into Sad. I stood on the proverbial cliff of my life and called and called for Joy. Eventually, she answered and, apparently she is a Leprechaun who resides under my bed. She's the customer experience manager of my life. She plans incredible dinner parties, goes to movies and galleries, takes walks with trees, brings old friends together, makes dinner every Sunday night for who ever comes, sings ‘You Make Me Feel Like A Natural Woman’ to the dog in the mornings, and, dresses every day as if Mario Testino is in the front yard with a film crew.  She is also the one who reminds me to sit with my daughters and look into their eyes and just be and glory be, what a piece of work is man and these girls are a miracle and endlessly bring me joy. Life turns into a sweet love poem when they are with me. Thank you Ms. Leprechaun.

 3.      I learned to eat my pie Humble. Further to #1, Hey guess what? I am not better than anyone else! Newsflash: super interesting people are absolutely everywhere if you look and, I feel like everyone knew this but me, taxi drivers are some of the smartest dudes on earth. Think about it, they listen to the radio all day (tons of fact based knowledge) and they have time to think and reflect (the ability to process those facts with previous knowledge, plus a deep understanding of humanity) = an invaluable and always entertaining source of public opinion, randomized, and anonymized. Cool.

 4.      I discovered the Art of Restraint. This past year, I tried very hard to exercise restraint in all things. Inwardly, this means not giving in to my immediate response (Mr. Very Overworked Amygdala), because we truly never know how the story will progress. Life is like an 8- ball; most of the time we should just ‘concentrate and ask again’. This also means saving the best for me. I learned I do not need to leave everything on the table, and, indeed, my value is increased by not ‘revealing all’. Outwardly, I have learned to listen carefully before responding. If you hear the squawks of birds in the air, it’s likely a tiger is approaching and you should lie low. This little tool comes in handy with all aspects of life. Restraint in design almost always adds to the beauty of what remains. I discovered that editing my life to create space and air makes for a better experience. I say this both metaphorically (as in do less, experience more) and literally (as in remove all the cushions from the couch and add one back. Now take a look).

 5.      I experienced Serenity in an Onion. I hate chopping onions, they stink, they make my eyes water, they eek sour juice all over my kitchen and, the repeated slicing is so, so tedious.  I invariably find myself rushing through, cutting fast, murdering the thing, getting splattered, getting annoyed and making lists in my head of what I need to do next. I am better than this damn onion.  However dear reader, to be a home chef (which I aspire to) you learn that all great dishes have the same foundational ingredients and, onions are one of them. So this past year, I’ve approached the onion chopping task with an intention to experience the greatness of an onion and the beauty of this act of nurture. I simply slowed down. I saw the oniony juice as proof of freshness, the savoury warmth and life of an onion.  The smell of the onion I now viewed as a harbinger of the layers of taste I was creating.  I tried a different approach when chopping too. I carefully made small cuts lengthwise and then across the width of the fruit. An incredible pattern emerged. Now, perfect 3D onion squares merge with bubbly warm butter in my pan, and the smell is divine.

 That’s it. Five small things that I discovered, experienced, learned, and observed in 2018. Thanks so much for reading. It completes the circle for me. There is no writing without readers and responses. W