My personal post to date

NO ONE HAD TO TELL ME.

Nearly 4 years ago, I absolutely, positively, unequivocally, knew I was stuck. The thing is I knew it for several years. I just didn’t know who to ask for help. And even if I found that person, I didn’t know what I’d ask….

"Ummmm…Can you help me get unstuck?”

It might sound like my life was crumbling. But it wasn’t. From the outside looking in, I achieved some significant “success” at the age of 33.

• Spiritual success? A tight relationship with God.
• Relational success? Married to Kelly. (10 years) Father to 3 amazing kids.
• Personal success? Overcame an addiction to self-injury.
• Professional success? An associate pastor. Picked to be the next lead pastor.
• Financial success? Safe. Comfortable. Secure. Retirement. Etc.
• Writing success? 4 traditionally published books by largest Christian publisher.
• Physical success? Healthy and fit.
• Academic success? Earned Master and Doctoral degrees.

So what was the problem?

How about…ME!

I knew the path I needed to take, but I was scared to death to take it. No exaggeration. I felt paralyzed. I didn’t want to think about risk. And I feared change. Still, I knew God wanted me to step into something new.

I felt the pull toward a great adventure, but I was unsure what it was. Besides, I didn’t believe I could do anything else…

• This was why I went to school.
• This was my calling.
• This was my path.

Or was it?

Besides, if God truly wanted me to do something else, then He needed to guarantee success. Yeah…that’s it. It was His fault. I enjoyed playing that card for a couple years, watching the time pass.

Looking back, I evolved into a place where instead of playing to win, I had settled for playing not to lose.

Yep. Felling stuck stinks, even if you’re safe, comfortable, and successful.

After another year ticked by, I was sickened by my condition. I didn’t like myself or the man I was becoming. I felt controlled by fear and I couldn’t do anything about it.

I wrote a letter of desperation to someone I respected. Although I didn’t know him personally, I read his blog posts and listened to his podcasts. Here’s an actual excerpt from the email I sent him back in early 2011:

… my mentor passed over a year ago and I detest stagnancy. I've read your blog for years and I've benefited from your insight, legacy, and wisdom.

I know in this new chapter that you are not sipping lemonade wasting your time. And because I value your time, I am willing to pay you for it. I wonder, if I could make my way down to _________, if you would be willing to spend 1/2 a day - a full day with me.

I promise not to waste your time. I will come with questions prepared and I will be a good student during our time. I know we are both busy, but I feel that in order to continue to grow, I need to learn from those who know more than me.

Thanks, even for your consideration. — Kary Oberbrunner

Although I cloaked it well, my email was a cry for help. It was me grasping for some form of clarity. The recipient of my email responded back. He was kind. He suggested I contact a particular organization for personal coaching.

I felt a little bummed and unheard. I already had a great coach. What I needed was specific insight on specific issues. But thankfully his pushback forced me to clarify exactly what I needed. I wrote back:

I'd like your wisdom in 3 specific areas:

1. How to effectively integrate business and ministry.
2. Strategy development for a long-term career with writing elements.
3. Increased platform development

Then I pressed SEND.

Although, I never heard back from him on that topic, the interaction sowed a seed. Through our little email exchange I identified what I needed. I left that conversation with the awareness of what I was looking for and more importantly whom I was looking for.

A few weeks later, despite my state of unbelief, I encountered a next step. I took it, regardless of my fear and hesitancy. Then the next step appeared. And I took that.

Many of these steps manifested themselves in the form of investments. These investments always required action. Some also took time and a few even required a financial investment too. For the first time in my life, I intentionally focused on growing. Not for an academic degree, or paycheck, or applause.

I met key people along the way who helped me reach my next level. Some helped for a short season and others for several seasons.

Along the way something changed. More accurately, someone changed.

ME!

Author James Allen nailed it. He said:

People are anxious to improve their circumstances, but are unwilling to improve themselves; they therefore remain bound.”

When I was stuck I wanted everything around me to change. But rather ignorantly, I was unwilling to change myself. Truth be told, I didn’t think I was worth it. Why would I invest in myself? I didn’t believe in myself. Ironically though, I wanted everyone else around to believe in me. Talk about hypocrisy and backward thinking.

I needed to take the first step by investing in myself. Then slowly, people began to sense my belief and after time they invested in me too.

Fast-forward to today and circumstances and life are radically different.

• Spiritually? I have a more authentic and mature relationship with God.
• Personally? I sleep more...intentionally. I picked up running too. I coached my son’s football team the last 3 seasons.
• Professionally? I have a business partner. We started 2 international teams teams of more than 100 speakers, coaches, and trainers. We created four 6-figure brands that are growing each month. We started a non-profit and we also have an LLC.
• Financially? We moved into a home that now fits our expanding family. We rejoice in our blessings. And we’re giving away more than we ever have.
• Writing? I wrote 2 more books of my own. I helped collaborate on several other book projects. And I now mentor more dozens and dozens of authors in our Author Academy Elite program. I’m helping brand new authors give birth to the story inside them. Talk about fulfillment!
• Physically? I’m stronger, leaner, and healthier than I’ve ever been.
• Academically? But I’m consuming and applying more quality content than ever. And now my motives are correct—learning to learn, not for degrees.

Some things are still the same…but better.

• Relationally? Married to Kelly. (14 years now) We traveled more in the last 4 years than within the first 10. Still a father to 3 amazing kids…who are growing everyday.

SO WHY THE STORY?

Because in 2014 I did something I’m going to do again in 2015. I’m sharing it with you, because it might involve you. But that’s up to you.

See, I heard Andy Stanley say something a couple years ago that caused me to pause. He said:

Do for one what you wish you could do for everyone.

His simple statement challenged me to change my behavior. (And that’s not an easy thing to do.)

Up until 2014 I had a particular request surfacing more and more. Although phrased in different ways, the gist was:

• “Do I mentor anyone?”
• “Would I be willing to help someone achieve more success personally and professionally?”
• “Would I teach someone how to go from day job to dream job?”
• “Do I have a private mastermind group?”

Every time I heard this type of request I felt torn. I wanted to help the person asking. Obviously, he or she felt stuck in a particular area.

But the other part of me knew I didn’t have the correct structure to help. You can’t just dive into someone’s life and help with one decision and then move on unattached.

Getting truly unstuck is usually the result of a series of correct decisions, habits, strategies, and tactics. It’s inefficient and unkind to help someone for a day only to leave them stuck the next day. As a result, I waited until my business partner David and I could think of a solution.

In late 2013 it came.

We announced a 12-person mastermind, which would launch in 2014. The thought was simple. We’d invest in 12 people via a monthly mastermind call, a private on-line community, and a 2-day intensive face-to-face gathering at Shawshank Prison (day 1) and sparkspace (day 2). These 12 people would get our best thinking. We’d give them special access and we’d take a personal interest and investment in their lives and business.

These 12 people would already be successful. They would each have one common goal: to take their business to the next level. For some this would be to turn their passion into a full-time gig. For others it would be to make their business increase in influence, impact, and income.

We announced this opportunity at one of our small live gatherings to some hand-selected people. The spots filled immediately.

1 year later and the results from these first 12 are still pouring in:

• One member was invited to speak on the main stage at one of the largest gatherings for world changers of its kind.

• One member wrote and published his first book and created a follow-up coaching course.

• One woman left her day job, created her dream job, and now is able to spend more time with her young son.

• One member created and sold his first online course. He created his second one and will launch it during first quarter 2015.

• One member won several awards and became the chapter president for the National Association of Professional Women.

• Two members integrated their faith with their business and received incredible feedback for their courage.

With results like this David and I knew we needed to do this again in 2015.

Recently, we let a few people know about this opportunity. Several of these spots are now filled. These members who responded are incredibly talented, motivated, and committed. I’m quite excited to be working with them.

David and I are stepping up our game too. We are making a few enhancements to the 2015 mastermind:

• We’re including a more robust private online community that keeps the 12 members connected throughout the month to ensure even more accountability, collaboration, and implementation.

• We’re requiring all mastermind members to approach this process as fellow givers. When all 12 members show up filled up, ready to serve the other members, then our collective results will supersede all expectations. All members must seek to add value to the other members.

• David will step up his role in the mastermind. Many members desire access to David’s talents for structures and systems. As a result, David and I will both share the role as guides for the mastermind. We work extremely well together and complement each other’s strengths. As a result, we will each bring our expertise to the mastermind.

• Back by popular demand, our 2-day intensive face-to-face gathering at Shawshank Prison (day1) and sparkspace (day 2) will still take place. However, we’ll also incorporate some new themes, twists, and outcomes. These enhancements will make the experience even more valuable and practical.

Bottom line, we will do for these 12 what we wish we could do for everyone. With several spots already filled, we wanted to bring this to you first.

Next week we’ll share this opportunity as an open invitation through a series of FREE webinars.

Before we do, David and I chatted about the people we want in this select group. We identified you (our readers and listeners). That’s the reason you’re getting this first. You can self-select by agreeing to the investment of time, commitment, and finances.

If you’re serious about taking the next step and being considered for one of the remaining spots then please email [email protected] for more information.

If you commit to this process, chances are you’ll be a different person one year from now. This includes spiritually, relationally, professionally, financially, and maybe even physically. We’ll show you the path and the implementation is up to you.

But rest assured, we’ll hold you to the fire. And so will your other 11 members. We want you to succeed just as much as you want it, maybe even more. We’ve personally invested the last 4 years of our lives and large sums of money to learn what we did and achieve the results we have achieved. We’ve added value to ourselves through key experiences and relationships. As a result, we’ve become more valuable and we want to invest that value in those who truly want it.

We give all the glory to God for our success and we believe the Parable of the Talents is truth. God expects us to invest and develop our talents. A day is coming where we will all give an account for what’s been entrusted to us.

David and I want to be found faithful. If it’s also your desire and if 2015 is the year you want to become a soul on fire…I mean TRULY become a soul on fire, then we’d love to have you join us.

This special invitation moves you up to the front of the line. You can take as much time as you need to think about it, but we open it up to the public next week.

Let me know if you have any thoughts, questions, and if you want IN now.

Remember, we believe in you.

Kary and David