Why being a great collaborator is good for business (& how to be one)

Being a great collaborator and connector takes work. Its not just about who you know, or even who knows you.

What I've realised that being a great collaborator is good for business. It leads you to connections,team members, resources, funding, customers, and skills, methods and tools that you didn't know about, or could never hope to reach on your own.

I've been introduced to people that I wouldn't normally come into contact with that have helped me grow my business in extraordinary ways. For instance, my advisory board, is made up of 5 of the most capable people on the planet, who are brilliant at what they do. And 4 of them were introduced to me by people that I helped.

Most of my team of 30 is made up of introductions for the same reasons. All of the people we identified as are early hires are recommendations. All are partners have been introduced to us by others. And I have a hundred other examples.

But to do all that well requires an additional step.

Not only do you need to get good at collaboration, but also at connection. What I've come to recognise is that being a good collaborator should naturally lead you to being a great connector. Connecting other people in your network, for no immediate material reward

Why would I want to be a great connector?

There could be many reasons. Altruism, self-interest, 'paying-it-forward'. One of the important truths that I've learned through my start-up journey, is that there are inescapable hidden 'laws' of the universe which apply to you, and everyone you know, and they work whether you know, understand or believe in them or not (just like the law of gravity).

In this case, it's called the law of 'reciprocity'.

"In order to receive,you must first give." The interesting concept about this law, is that (unlike email) where you receive "from" is probably not where give "to".

I receive about 7-10 calls a week from people in my network asking me "do i know a person who can do...", or "Is looking for X,Y,Z....etc"

And its a topic that also populates perhaps another 20% of my 100+ phone calls weekly. In the middle of a call, where I'm talking with a peer about their current challenges. "So you are trying to do A, B & C, but you don't know how or who? I know a girl that specialises in doing just that. And they can help you address it by doing 1,2,3.....,".

In fact, very few calls pass by without leading to a mutual introduction.

How do I become a great connector?

It's hard to pinpoint whether its more art or science, but what I can say for sure is that its requires a focus on 3 things:-

1. Its all about people.

• It's about the people who are trying to get from 'here' to 'there', and knowing; people who also know that you know someone well that can help them do it faster.

1. Understanding what they want, need & value. And respecting them for their perspectives, views and beliefs, especially when they differ from your own.
2. Its also always about trust - the trust that each person has, to know that you have best interests at heart; that the people you put in their path have a common interest & alignment and that they are also trustworthy.

So where do I start, and with how many?

Which raises interesting questions about who you invite or let into your network. In the early stages of building your network, you might be happy to make or accept connections from anyone.

I wrote about this topic some time ago ; whether to "Connect, reject or deflect".
https://thatstartupguy.blogspot.com.au/2013/08/social-media-requests-connect-reject-or.htm

• People who use social media platforms to promote their brand, message or even their expertise can experience an unwanted, or perhaps inconvenient, outcome - 'the connector'.
• Yes, another brand, person or business that wants to connect with you. That's not necessarily a bad thing - we all seek a wider audience and greater engagement, don't we? After all, isn't 'more followers' the thing we all seek?

However, in the longer term, this approach will weaken you in serious ways. This is an example of when "Less is (definitely) more".

There is an another example of this in the practical application of the principle of 'Dunbar's number", which says that

• "Dunbar's number is a suggested cognitive limit to the number of people with whom one can maintain stable social relationships. These are relationships in which an individual knows who each person is and how each person relates to every other person. This number was first proposed by British anthropologist Robin Dunbar, who found a correlation between primate brain size and average social group size. By using the average human brain size and extrapolating from the results of primates, he proposed that humans can only comfortably maintain 150 stable relationships." source: https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Dunbar's_number
  

It's often said that you are the average of the 5 people with whom you spend the most time. There's also a well known quote (often attributed to James Rohn), that 5 years from now, you will be the same person you are today, but for the people you spend time with, and the books that you read (or more accurately, the information you put into your head).

If the basic premise of these ideas is true, it leads us to a number of inescapable conclusions.

Which people should I be connecting with?

As any great mentor will tell you, your "Net worth" is equivalent to your "network". Therefore, by diluting your network with people with whom you neither resonate, nor with whom you might add value, you lessen your chances of creating meaningful, engaging and valuable outcomes.

Unlike some social media measurement algorithms would have you believe, real- world social media 'clout' has little to do with how many connections you have (unless you are a famous media star or politician), and everything to do with the capacity & willingness of each individual to engage in a meaningful way.

And worse, if the 5 people with whom you spend the most amount of time, are not where you want to be (or on the path to it), you are short-changing your future.

So how does this lead me to becoming a great connector?

Start by thinking about who is in your network.
then apply the 3 principles (above) to each of them.

1. Knowing people
2. Understanding what they want, and
3. Developing trust (is it mutual?)

If you can honestly answer 'yes' to each of the people in your network, you are well on the way.

Next, start thinking about who you can add value to. What could you help them create/ do/ be/ become?

Now get into action. Make that connection, referral, or introduction. Give them a reason to want to engage; create value, for yourself, and for others. And then expect that reciprocity will come your way.

But there is one more requirement -you can't just wait for reciprocity - you must also be prepared to ask for it. Which means getting out of your comfort zone and opening your mouth.

As Mark Suster. the Entrepreneur turned Venture Capitalist advocates, go & have 50 coffees a month, & talk with 50 new people, one-to-one.

• "50 coffee meetings. It should stick in your head as a metaphor for networking. For getting outside of your comfort zone. For starting relationships today that won’t pay off for a year. It’s the entrepreneur’s equivalent of “10,000 hours.”

Now get out there and collaborate your heart out.

About Daniel

Also travelling under the alias of 'That Startup Guy' , I am a co-founder of StartUp Foundation (The Startup Accelerator for Experienced Professionals) and am intensely, deeply, passionately dedicated to "The intersection between personal mastery & business entrepreneurship".

I spent 20 years in corporate life before catching the startup bug. My first venture as an intrapreneur now turns over more than $10 million in profits per year. I've since designed, built & launched 14 startups across ecommerce, hospitality, social networking, logistics, financial services and the not-for-profit sectors.

If you've got an experience about startup success (or failure), why not share it? If you've got a question, reach out to me via your preferred social media. And if you like the article. please follow me and share it.