Start-up horror stories - part 2

In part one of this Hallowe’en-themed blog, I looked at some of the big, external factors that can have an impact on your business - from bloodsucking recruiters to zombified focus groups. For part two, I’m looking a little closer to home and remembering Steve Jobs’ oft-quoted saying:

Things don’t have to change the world to be important.

In keeping with our ghoulish theme, let’s think about some of the ways in which a proactive approach to business can help you avoid a horror story of your own.

The act of creation

The infamous Dr Frankenstein created his monster by sewing together different body parts, drawing on his knowledge of anatomy to make sure everything fit together perfectly. Whatever sort of creation you’re planning on building, having a clear company structure is absolutely necessary - if you’ve got three lab assistants working on neck bolts but none making sure the legs stay on properly, your monster will be a failure. To keep things simple, define your company’s functional processes, so everyone in your team knows where they slot in, how each function meshes with the next, and who they should report. Just like Dr Frankenstein’s anatomical diagrams, a clear map of how everything fits together is vital. Finally, make sure you appoint a Product Manager (or ‘mad scientist’) to oversee the whole process, help unite disparate objectives and check that you’re not running out of needles and thread.

Building a powerful cult(ure)

Whether you’re leading a company or a country, the same principles always apply - and although evil geniuses aren’t usually the most kind-spirited people, they do know how to run an organisation. Fu Manchu, Sauron and Darth Vader all understood the basics - establish a stable economy and keep it under control, ensure order through an inspired combination of leadership and well-timed delegation, and make sure your workers are motivated and committed to your cause. Scratch the surface of a charismatic cult leader and you’ll find a misguided entrepreneur… who knows what Anakin Skywalker could have achieved with a seed investment and the right mentoring?

Binding together your process

Whether you run a development, design or operational function, having the right process is the key to making the most of your team’s skills and ensuring everything works fluidly. There’s no better example of a tried and tested process than the creation of a mummy - and while your employees might not wear jackal masks or have a bucket of scarab beetles to hand, you can still learn from their dedication to a perfect system. If the priest in charge of wrapping bandages gets his turn before the priest who puts the organs into those little jars, the whole production line ends up in disarray; similarly, any confusion in your process will allow chinks in the operational chain to appear and gradually widen. This is a natural part of developing any organised system, so it’s vital to foster a culture of continuous improvement - meeting problems head on gives you the chance to resolve them before they impact your productivity.

Whilst these blogs have been a bit of Hallowe’en fun rather than anything too serious, there are important lessons to be learned from every startup horror story. As Steve Jobs - now there’s a man who knew how to build a cult - said:

If you look really closely, most overnight successes took a long time.

A lot of work goes in before waiting for that final bolt of lightning, so if you want to create your own all-powerful monster you need to keep a (preferably not disembodied) eye on the details.