How To Avoid Ending Up Single In Networking
Anders Liu-Lindberg
Leading advisor to senior Finance and FP&A leaders on creating impact through business partnering | Interim | VP Finance | Business Finance
What’s the worst situation to be in at a networking event? Standing alone in the corner! What’s the second worst situation be in? Getting stuck with the one who is standing alone in the corner! Not knowing anyone before entering a network event is so terrifying not because you feel uncomfortable yourself, but because of the how you are looked upon by the rest of the attendants. No one wants to speak with you because of the risk of getting stuck with you for the whole evening simply because you must be an oddball since you are not talking to anyone. That is also why no one will join your conversation even you are two individuals talking to each other. Why you ask? Because one of the individuals is seen as being stuck with the other, the oddball.
This is the brutal reality at networking events hence you will need some serious survival skills to make through networking events where you know no one. I recently read a good blog about the number 1 networking survival tip courtesy of Christopher Barrat. Stay away from singles and couples but join a threesome and you will have great conversations without it being too crowded in a larger group where people are just trying to prove themselves instead of having meaningful conversations. In order to make sure you don’t break up a group of friends you can also look at how open the group of three are positioned. For a detailed guide suggest you look through the blog although you might have to google translate it as it is in Danish.
Therefore while being single in general might have its advantages there are absolutely no advantages of being single in a networking world and every time you attend a networking event you have to find open groups of threes. For introverts especially this is a tough reality and will lead to most of them shying away from most networking events however in a networking world no one can really afford that. Sure you can build a large network online by forging loose relationships, but at the end of the day you got to get out there and meet your connections. Therefore I have made getting better at networking a must win battle for myself and take comfort in the fact that no one really feels very comfortable with networking. It just always seems that way because you see people standing around and talking to each other. Maybe they are there with friends, maybe they know the community or perhaps they have just applied tip number 1 above. No matter what it is successful networking is for you too or put in another way you simply can’t afford not to.
Please share your stories of how you overcame fears of networking or how you look upon singles and couples in the networking world?
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6 年Remind yourself that everyone simply APPRECIATES when you begin to talk to them. They too are there to connect and learn from others ! Actually you do them a favour by simply reaching out. When you think of this it will become easier to just do it.
Leader of a global network creating engaged & influential finance professionals & leaders who solve meaningful problems for organisations in this digital age.
7 年Anders I agree we need to be out there physically connecting with others, for introverts networking/connecting can initially be tough so when I asked for advice from people who were good at it, what they gave me back was "Enjoy It" don't feel like you have to impress people or that they're there with friends, make it into a game of seeing how much you can learn from others. Oh and smile!
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8 年i recently heard on a podcast that one way to approach these networking events is to consider that you are actually hosting the event yourself. when you do a party and friends of friends that you don't know tag along you find yourself walking to them in confidence (after all it is your home) and talk to them. if you set your mind in the same way during networking events it seems to produce marvelous results. i have to try this method next time. someone ever tried this? these social skills can actually make a big difference in one's career.
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8 年Hi Anders. Hope all is well. Networking events are a scary scenario for some, but the reason I don't go to them anymore (for some time now) is because I just don't find them productive. Like many other business people, I am swamped. I put in many hours to both my primary and secondary businesses, so time is valuable to me. Rather than go to a networking event for a couple hours or more once a week, or even twice a month, I'd rather spend an hour here or there to reach out to specific individuals I'd like to meet directly—either via social media or email—or even ask a friend or business colleague to invite one of their business colleagues out for breakfast or lunch or even a coffee, and then I’ve reciprocated. There's no 'noise' of distraction; no fake 'here's my card, here's my card' exchanges with people that will never call me and that I have no interest in, etc. I’ve met wonderful people this way.