Coach Your Self Yourself

“Eklavya”- mastered archery through disciplined self-study and found his coach “Dronacharya” in a statute. His internal self – belief that the statute would teach him kept him determined and resolute. It was Eklavya self-determination that helped him become an archer comparable to the famous archer Prince Arjun. He never had an opportunity to get coaching from his idol teacher but I am sure each one of us is lucky enough to have at least one coach in life.

I have had the opportunity to get the best coaching from some exceptional coaches in my professional career. But in the busy schedules that make our lives, most of us claim that neither they have the time or the energy to peruse self-development goals and the journey towards self-improvement dies a “slow death”.

Have you ever wondered why do we always need an external intervention for self-development? Aren’t their ways which can be adopted to coach ourselves? Can’t we become our “Self-Coaches”? I think most certainly we can, it might be difficult and hard but will be a great technique of living our lives happily without resistance. Self-development helps you re-outline your goals towards creating the life you want for yourself.

There are many ways of self-coaching. I have shared #5 ways that will re-define your objectives towards self-coaching: (Not in any particular order)

#1. Self- Dialog/ Discussion – Identifying the Objective

Optimistic self-conversation is the best way to start the self-coaching/development journey. We have an honest conversation with your mind and heart all the time. It is important to listen to the voice in your head and evaluate those messages. We just cannot pretend not to know ourselves. If you not getting answers to your questions, please undergo any psychometric tests to determine your strengths and weaknesses. It helps you ask questions to yourself – why self-coaching? What is the vision? What do you want to achieve? Ask powerful questions and get the answers to open up opportunities for exploration and replace the close and self-limiting thoughts with positive feelings of “I can make a difference” with “I will make a difference” Write down your feelings, ideas and plans to create a sense of momentum and increased inspiration. It helps to create free flow of ideas and form new set of avenues and possibilities.

#2.Priority Action Planning and Accountability

What are the activities on your list? How are they related to your objectives? Brainstorm and prepare a prioritised action plan with timelines to achieve the milestones. Own the plan and take the complete responsibility. Own up your mistakes and actions to lessen your load. This will help you highlight your strengths and skills. Regardless of your struggle and energy, there will be times of failure and setbacks. Learn from the mistakes and take it as an opportunity to grow. Set define dates for your actions for you to move towards your goal. Instead of creating a “To do list, prepare a “Not to do list” to determine what actions / activities can be delegated? When to say “No” to your friends and relatives? “When to avoid a social gathering/ party”. Adding meaningful activities to your life will help you gain productivity and success. At times, it is also important to do a reality check. So be honest to yourself and ask yourself “Is the plan achievable”? Make revisions if necessary, but stick to it.

#3. Give yourself an Incentive or Reward

Time to refuel the tank of the car. I am sure by now, you need energy bars and nourishment for yourself. Take some time out and give yourself an incentive or reward for your efforts and hard work. Everyone has their way of reloading their energy, for some it may be listening to music, going out for a movie or just talking on the phone. Just try and consciously take out time from your busy schedule. At times when we focus too much and get busy, and this area gets neglected.

#4. Division of Goals / Objectives

Ambitious goals can come to life if you break up the goals into smaller steps that will take you there where you actually want to be. Breaking down your goals into sub-goals takes you closer to your objective. At times goals/objectives gets abandoned because they are too immense. A big goal when broken down into achievable sub-goals are much easier, fun and motivating. The idea is to understand the smaller responsibilities involved in achieving the bigger purpose. It is also important to have a milestone and timelines attached to each sub goal for it to help in achieving the final goal.

#5. Let it chase you – Success

The more you run after success, the more it runs away. Let it chase you! Chasing success is running behind a small kid. How do you catch him? You have to trust, be patient and at times just sit confidently that he himself will come back to you. You just have to hold on till the right time. The idea is to not to chase success but to pursue excellence- what are you best at and how you can get better. Follow the passion and enjoy your journey.

“Things turn out best for the people who make the best of the way things turn out “– John Wooden

Self-coaching is a simple practice which can be begin any time. It will help you break the habit of uncertainty that prevents you from realising your inner potential. These ways mentioned above are in no chronological order and other points/ways can be modified/added to pursue your journey towards self-coaching.

My personal favourite way of self-coaching is point #3 – which is self- reward. I guess it has always motivated me to carry on with the journey of self-coaching. Please share other different ways out of your experience that can help each one of us for better self-coaching.

Keep Calm and Coach Your Self Yourself