Today, Don't Thank Me For My Service

Today, Memorial Day, has begun to lose its significance. It is becoming Christmas without the nativity; Thanksgiving without family and thanks. Memorial Day, previously known as Decoration Day, is a day set aside after the Civil War to honor our war dead. Unfortunately, somber reflection on the cost of our freedom and the price paid by those who never came home has been replaced by spirited discussion about holiday sales and the merits of white pants.

"So what?" you ask. It's important because Memorial Day isn't about military service, although many people will make that mistake today and thank me for my service. It's about military sacrifice. We don't talk about the latter as often because it makes us uncomfortable. We choose to shield our children from that horrific reality. The reason the distinction between service and sacrifice is important is because service doesn't provide a full accounting of the cost of war.

Memorial Day is important because it forces us to recalibrate that cost. It should be a day when we take a moment to think about young men and women who have left us too early; the lives that will never be led; the children never raised; the aching hearts of widows and mothers. Perhaps just as important, it should be a day when we reaffirm our obligation as citizens to be active participants in our democracy and security, lest we grow too indifferent of war being fought on some other poor bastard's shores by some other poor bastard's sons and daughters.

The cost I speak of is Mike Washington, Jr. I served with Mike in both Iraq and Afghanistan. Mike was killed in Afghanistan along with three other incredible young men. Mike was a life lost too early. He had a contagious smile, an engaging wit and an insatiable love of life. Mike, unfortunately, is just one example. I and the other men of Second Battalion, Seventh Marines think about Mike and the nearly thirty men we lost on those two tours every single day. That's not a burden we wish the nation would share with us, save for this single day.

Today, don't thank me for my service. Thank Mike for his sacrifice. Tell your children about Mike. Promise Mike you'll be a better citizen; that you'll vote and hold your representatives accountable. Let's not let Memorial Day slip onto the list of increasingly inconsequential holidays.

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Let's keep the conversation going on Twitter: you can find me at @badgerjake and can tag TR at @teamrubicon.

Purchase my book on leadership in high stakes situations, Take Command, here.

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Jake Wood is the Cofounder and CEO of Team Rubicon, a nationwide nonprofit that provides military veterans with the opportunity to continue their service by responding to natural disasters and global crises. As a leading veteran advocate, Jake is also the cofounder of POS REP, the first mobile, proximity-based social network designed exclusively for the veteran community. Prior to Team Rubicon, Jake served as a Sergeant in the United States Marine Corps, with deployments to both Iraq and Afghanistan as a Scout Sniper. In October 2014 Crown Publishing will publish Jake’s first book on leadership, titled Take Command.