Answer This Question Before 2014 Begins

A few months ago, I attended the world premiere of a play called Oblivion. In it, sixteen-year-old Julie (played by Katie Broad) is torn between her parents' opinions and her own desires. At a climactic moment, Julie recites a list of questions she has about her life.

Here's how New York Times reviewer, Anita Gates, described the moment when Julie uttered the most sobering question of all:

With a mass intake of breath, (the audience) seemed to meld surprise, recognition, admiration, resignation, sadness and shame. Julie, preparing to self-baptize in a kiddie pool on the building roof, asks the universe,

Do things become clearer as you grow older or do you just get better at settling for smaller answers?”

I've been pondering this question ever since.

From a teenage's perspective, it's easy to see why she might think that adults get better at settling for smaller answers: some do.

Kids can grow up with parents who fight or barely seem to even like each other. They may watch adults come home and complain about their boss, job, company and commute. They see adults socialize with people about whom they might gossip or criticize.

But some teenagers don't act much differently. They can be even more sullen and critical. So I don't buy that aging is solely responsible for tunnelvision.

Growing older doesn't necessarily mean your life gets narrower. It provides countless opportunities to travel, learn, meet new people and expand your horizons.

The problem is... not every person views life an an opportunity to grow and broaden their experiences.

In fact, each of us faces a choice. The world sorts us into one of two types of people. As we head into 2014, I'd like to suggest that you ask yourself which kind of person you wish to be:

One who grows clearer with age: These are the people who embrace change, who recognize that it is inevitable. They don't get shocked when their children become adults, their job morphs into something new, or the character of their community starts to transform.

One who gets better at settling for smaller answers: These people tend to fear change. These unfortunates end up living in smaller and smaller boxes. They keep jettisoning the aspects of life that scare or unsettle them.

Obviously, most of us aspire to grow clearer as we gain experience, but it is very, very difficult to do this. I have no easy answers for you, just this simple reminder that life is too short to live it inside a box of your own making.

In 2014, I hope that you and I both broaden our horizons, enrich our lives and the lives of the people around us, and open our minds to amazing new possibilities.

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Katie Broad and Aidan Kunze photo by Carol Rosegg; courtesy of Westport Country Playhouse. B/W image by Zuhair Ahmad/Flickr.