20 things I learned in my 20s
Toks Coyle
Admin, marketing and techy support for creatives, coaches & charities | Next-level eagle eyes ???? to perfect your fabulous work | Virtual Business Support and VA Team @ Toks.Rocks | Travel Blogger @ ToksTravels.com
I turned 30 a few months ago and have done a lot of reflecting lately.
Here are twenty things I learned in my twenties:
1.??????School doesn’t very adequately prepare you for life.
2.??????Failing grades isn’t the end of the world. Learn, pivot, and keep it moving. A lot of employers and clients don’t care much about them anyway, so you soon won’t either.
3.??????Education alone is not enough for progressing in your career. Things that are more useful are valuable work experience and networking in the right places.
4.??????Networking is highly beneficial for gaining knowledge and opportunities. And you might have to do a mad amount of it in order to benefit adequately - it's a numbers game to discover those people that will help you and filter through those that won't.
5.??????Use Google more (or any other search engine), especially when it comes to things like learning to get a job.
6.??????It’s OK not to know what you want to do as a career straight away. Pick something and see where your journey takes you - it might surprise you! Plus, nothing has to be forever - you can always change your mind at any point.
7.??????Careers can be complicated things, so having a mentor ASAP to guide you is pretty essential if you don’t want to keep wandering around cluelessly.
8.??????It's actually OK not to be career-minded. Nothing is wrong with you if you can't come up with a dream job - in my opinion, this is just capitalist conditioning anyway. Be happy just to make a living (or not, if you don't work) and focus gaining your happiness from other priorities in life that light you up.
9.??????Getting rejected from a job sucks, but it’s not the end of the world. It just wasn’t the right role for you. Get feedback if you can and keep trying for the next opportunity. And if they don’t bother giving you any useful feedback, then they DEFINITELY weren’t for you as they’d probably be useless at supporting you. Later, you can just think back and say, "Their loss!" ????
10.??It’s not really worth stressing too much over career stuff. After all, your employer/client probably ain’t gonna cry when you die - you’re replaceable to them ????. Only exception is if you’re famous, then your fans might cry.
11.??A lot of people give bad, bad advice. This is because they tend to have a relatively small worldview from their limited experience in life ??. Yes, myself included sometimes! So, take what some people say with a pinch of salt, hear from a range of sources, and then use your own judgement!
12.??Similarly to my earlier point - a lot of people are pretty useless at helping you, even if they’re in positions where they're apparently supposed to be helpful people. Seek the right help from the right places (another reason to network loads). Or just rely on yourself. Whichever is more applicable in your situation.
13.??You can be a lovely kind person, and there will always be someone that doesn't like you for some reason. Basically, your mere existence will always offend someone ??. Some strange people, eh? #DifferentFolksDifferentStrokes
14.??Marriage isn't for everyone.
15.??Having kids isn't for everyone.
16.??It's OK to not be dating at the same time or rate as other people.
17.??It's pretty easy to make friends in backpacker hostels, even if you're quite a socially awkward loner.
18.??Do things to make yourself happy, not other people (even if they're your family). If you are doing something that makes you unhappy, it's you that suffers!
19.??The terms renaissance soul, scanner, and multipotentialite - they all mean that you have multiple different interests and can struggle to pick just one to focus on. I identify as these, so you can imagine how fun and easy it was for me to try and pick a career (not!).
20.??Just because something costs more money, doesn’t necessarily make it better. It just means it costs more money. Still do your due diligence to check whether it’s worth your money.
...I have more of course, but they're not LinkedIn-appropriate, lol. So this is my shareable list. Like I said, some people give bad advice, so I'm not giving any. These are just my views - make of them what you will. ??
Now, over to you...what are some things that you learned in your twenties? Comment below!
About the author: My name is Toks and I'm a Scots-based virtual assistant that provides admin, tech and PA services to creative small businesses.
Like my writing style? I can proofread, write your marketing content and reports, take minutes, do transcriptions, and much more. Learn more at my website: www.toks.rocks
Working to make coaching more accessible and help others see their true potential and create the life they want.
3 年Thanks for sharing, I love it and am going to share with my teenage daughter this evening too
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3 年Great article Toks, wise words indeed. I definitely spent too much time trying to please others in my 20s rather than myself - not worth it! Also learning to work smarter rather than harder is great advice - you gotta be able to get out as much or more than you put in!
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3 年Some great reflections Toks ??????
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3 年Lovely piece Toks, and happy belated birthday ??
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3 年Really great read, thank you Toks for sharing this - as mentioned above, you are way ahead of where I was at your age - took me a long time to grasp some of these wisdoms!! I’d never heard of those personality types but the descriptions struck a chord - think I might be similar! Gotta try everything once, eh? ??