#2 Mentally Strong People Don't Give Away Their Power

The book 13 Things Mentally Strong People Don't Do by Amy Morin argues that mental strength is a skill you can develop to cope with life's challenges and reach your full potential. It identifies 13 behaviors that can hinder mental strength and offers strategies to overcome them. Here is the second one:

#2. They Don’t Give Away Their Power

Mentally strong people understand the importance of retaining their power by not allowing others to dictate their emotions and actions.

Surrendering this power leads to a loss of self-control and autonomy, making one susceptible to manipulation and negativity. It cultivates a victim mentality, where one's happiness and well-being are contingent upon external factors and people. By taking responsibility for their reactions and emotions, mentally strong people maintain their inner strength and autonomy. They make conscious choices about how to respond to various situations and criticisms, ensuring they remain the architects of their own lives. This approach fosters resilience, emotional stability, and a proactive stance towards life's challenges.

Think about it this way...

Life is a chess game, and you are the chess master, not just a pawn in someone else’s game. Giving away your power is like letting your opponent make all the moves for you, deciding your fate on the board.

Retaining your power means playing your own game, making strategic moves based on your plans and responses, not reactionary moves forced by the other player.

Are you more like Marcus or Emma?

Power Shift: Transforming Criticism into Confidence

In the bustling city of Anderson, two colleagues, Marcus and Emma, faced criticism at work. Emma received feedback on a project and immediately took it as a personal attack.

She let the criticism dictate her mood and confidence, spending days dwelling on the negative comments and doubting her abilities. Her reaction gave her critics power over her, affecting her performance and well-being.

Marcus, faced with similar criticism, approached the situation differently. He listened objectively, separating his emotions from the feedback. He saw the critique as an opportunity for growth, not as a reflection of his worth. Marcus took control, using the feedback to improve his work and develop new strategies. He retained his power by choosing how to respond, turning a potentially negative experience into a catalyst for personal and professional development.

Over time, Emma noticed Marcus's confidence and progress. Inspired by his approach, she began to change her mindset. She started taking criticism constructively, focusing on solutions rather than problems. By taking back control over her emotions and reactions, Emma reclaimed her power, and both she and Marcus thrived, becoming valued members of their team.

13 Things Mentally Strong People Don't

AMAZON: Audiobook (6 hours, 36 minutes) and book available:

BLINKIST: 40 minute in-depth book summary available:

Great Related Book: Mindset

The book Mindset by Carol S. Dweck explores the concept of mindset and its impact on various aspects of life. The book argues that there are two main mindsets: fixed and growth.

• Fixed mindset: People with a fixed mindset believe their intelligence and talents are fixed traits. They view challenges as threats and failures as proof of their inadequacy.
• Growth mindset: People with a growth mindset believe their intelligence and talents can be developed through effort and learning. They see challenges as opportunities to learn and grow, and failures as stepping stones on the path to success.

Tip: When interviewing people for positions, interview to determine if they have a Growth versus Fixed Mindset. Then hire those with the strongest Growth Mindset that meet, or exceed, position requirements. This is what I do.

Mindset highlights the following key points:

• Mindset shapes how you approach challenges and setbacks: Those with a fixed mindset tend to give up easily, while those with a growth mindset persevere.
• Mindset can be learned: People can develop a growth mindset through practice and encouragement.
• Growth mindset benefits various aspects of life: It can lead to better academic performance, stronger relationships, and greater success in careers.

Mindset also provides examples of how mindsets play out in different situations, including:

• Education: Students with a growth mindset are more likely to thrive in challenging classes and learn from mistakes.
• Business: Companies with leaders who have a growth mindset are more likely to be successful.
• Relationships: People with a growth mindset are better at navigating challenges in their relationships.

The book offers practical tips for developing a growth mindset, such as:

• Praising effort over intelligence: This encourages a growth mindset by focusing on the process of learning.
• Embracing challenges: View challenges as opportunities to learn and grow.
• Learning from mistakes: Don't see failures as setbacks, but as stepping stones on the path to success.

By adopting a growth mindset, you can develop a more positive and resilient outlook on life, and achieve your full potential.

AMAZON: Audiobook (10 hours, 23 minutes) and book available.

BLINKIST: 15 minute in-depth book summary available

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