185. Qualities that lead to Paramatma

Krishna says, "Those devotees are very dear to Me who do not hate any being, who are friendly and compassionate, who are nir-mama (sans-I) and nir-ahankaar (sans -I am doer), who are balanced in pleasure and pain (sama-dukh-sukh) and forgiving (kshami). Who are ever-content, self controlled yogi, having firm conviction, and who have their mind and intellect dedicated to Me" (12.13 and 12.14).

At the outset, this appears to run contrary to Krishna's earlier assurance that none is dweshya (hateful) and none is priya (dear) to Him (9.29). While HIS blessings are available to everyone like rain, possessing these qualities is like keeping our bowl upright.

'Not hating anyone' is at the core of the Bhagavad Gita. Earlier Krishna advised to perform karmas (actions) by dropping hatred (5.3). When hatred becomes a part of us, shedding it becomes painful as it makes us lose a part of ourselves. It's like removing a harmful cancerous tumor, removal of which will still cause pain to us.

On the other hand, it is essential to drop hatred as it drives our behaviour and actions. 'Forgiveness' is the best antidote for hatred. Forgiveness requires courage and inculcating samatva (equanimity) gives that courage. Samatva is not only treating things and people as equal but also realising that we too possess the same negative qualities like greed and anger suppressed within us. Conversely, we have an aversion to these traits when we find them in others.

Krishna earlier said that nir-mama and nir-ahankaar is the path for peace (2.71). Similarly, 'ever content' is another foundational principle in the Gita. Essentially, when one quality is attained, others will follow automatically as they are interconnected. It's about identifying one of these traits that suits us and mastering it at the existential level.