144. Respect Has No Title
Jeff Matlow
I quickly transform new leaders and founder-led teams into the highest-performing people in your company | 3x entrepreneur (3 exits) | Author of The Best Leadership Newsletter Ever | Speaker, Podcaster, Runner
I went to the Bagel Nosh recently to get a buncha bagels and lotsa lox for a family get-together.
Boy oh boy do I love the lox. If I were Dr. Seuss I’d write a book called Fox In Sox with Lox in Box and Bagel on Table with Mable.
I suppose that’s one reason why I’m not Dr. Seuss.
Anyhoo, it was a large order so I phoned it in. I was told the order would be ready in 30 minutes. Great.
Just to be safe, I gave them 40 minutes before I went to pick it up.
A Funny Thing Happened At The Bagel Nosh
“I’m here to pick up my order,” I said to the cashier at the Bagel Nosh. “The name is Jeff”
He looked through the take-out shelf behind him and couldn’t find my order. He looked through his notes and couldn’t find my order. He asked me if it could be under the name “Samantha” - which, by the way, sounds nothing like “Jeff”. Her order doesn’t even have lox.
He called over to his manager who proceeded to flip through his own special order pad and finally found my order written down.
Whew.
He called out to somebody about my order then told me to have a seat. “We’ll bring the order to you,” he said.
I sat.
After five minutes of waiting, I assumed they hadn’t actually put my order together yet.
After fifteen minutes of waiting, I still saw nobody putting together my order.
I was perturbed. I stood and and walked towards the manager, when I noticed a side room. In that room were a bunch of orders waiting to be picked up.
Right there amongst the orders was one with JEFF written in big, bold letters.
My order had been ready all along. Nobody at the Bagel Nosh even looked for it. Even worse, they forgot about me the moment they told me to have a seat.
I grabbed my bag of bagels, loaded up my lox, and stormed out.
A Deal Called Respect
There’s an unspoken deal we make with our colleagues and associates in the workforce.
The unspoken deal is that we will show up where and when we say we will.
If we schedule a meeting, it is mutually agreed that all confirmed parties will either attend the meeting or let others know they are unable to attend. That’s the deal.
You know what the name of the deal is?
It’s called “mutual respect”.
Respect Has No Title
I once worked at a company where some people would just no-show meetings. No advanced notice. No after meeting apology or reasoning. Just no-show.
There was no accountability from the boss and nobody cared.
Crazy, right?
I thought so too.
Have you ever scheduled a call with somebody and they never showed up?
I’m not talking about the ones where they send an apology five minutes late. I’m talking complete no-show with no communication or acknowledgment.
It’s happened to me a few times.
I’d wait on the line for 15 or 20 minutes. I’d drop them a text or email. Nothing. Maybe two or three days later I’d get a note from them asking if they could reschedule.
It frustrates the hell out of me.
The deal is pretty simple: respect my time and I will respect yours.
Which brings us back to the Bagel Nosh.
Respect Is Not About Title
Respect isn’t about personal wealth or age or family name. Respect isn’t about a title.
I don’t care if you’re the President of the United States or the janitor at Chick-Fil-A, we are all humans and deserve the same respect.
The Bagel Nosh told me that my order would be done in 30 minutes. I respected their time by not showing up in 15 and demanding my food.
By not having my order done on time, by not making the effort to even find my order, they did not respect my time. They did not adhere to their side of the bargain.
How To Gain Respect
Getting the respect of other people is not too challenging, but there are certain things you need to do.
Those things will be outlined in the next newsletter.
In the meantime, was there a time you felt your time was disrespected at work? Let me know.
If you like what you read, please share it (on social media or with others)
Quote
“R-E-S-P-E-C-T"
- Aretha Franklin
Tidbits
Music & Entertainment Exec | 30+ yrs | Fmr. President of Music at STX Ent. | Business Development, Licensing & Music Supervision Expert
2 年Jeff, I the age of Zoom (last 2-years) I cannot even put a number on how many times me (I say with ZERO ego) a president of a division at a studio, has been left there starting at my own face wondering if I was in the wrong meeting or if the appointment would show up! I would say to my self each time, “what’s the statue of limitations on wait times? Do we wait 5-10-15 minutes?” I’ve just kept the screen on in the background to see (as a game) how long it would take for the meeting to wake up and realize… Only to be more frustrated and perturbed by the lack of RESPECT. Of course I consider myself a nice guy and will give anyone the benefit of the doubt and a second chance. However, that’s it. Fool me once… you know the drill. Anyways, I agree with you. BTW!!! I am not perfect, I’m late a lot. We all have much to do. BUT I do drop an email, text or call saying I’m late. We all like that little respect. Best practice is, give your fellows a heads up if you’re running late and you know so before the start of your pact so they’re day isn’t disrupted and/or thwarted by your mismanagement of time. As for the bagels and with many restaurants, I have noticed the change in quality of workers since we’re back from Covid to being in…
Business Administration + Bookkeeping | Marketing Strategy + Content Creation
2 年Great one, Jeff, and most of us have been there, waiting for the no-show in a meeting. Here's to mutual respect and knowing that all of our time is equally as valuable. And no one should mess with a man's access to lox!
Nelson Wells is Founder & CEO at Team Clermont, Nelson Wells Music Business Consulting & Coaching
2 年Relatable for sure, Jeff. Seems a simple concept doesn't it. Strangely, I honestly cannot recall ever having a no-show myself. Maybe in the South it's less common. I mean, our Southern christian mama's raised us with respect and plenty of guilt as well. Maybe the guilt is what keeps us respecting? Good to see you and Weintraub on here.
Charismatic Community Development | Relationship Builder & Public Servant who tenaciously labours for the public good
2 年Q: Did you "take the bagels and lox like a fox takes a bunny?" Funny, but, um, did you give them any money? ??♀?
Find your voice | Reach your audience | Build your reputation | Manage a crisis
2 年Kept me reading until the end. That’s a rarity. Following +1