13 DevOps typos explained, and how true they are

As a self-proclaimed expert in spelling errors, I’m here to entertain my colleagues with a list of amusing DevOps typos. These little slip-ups often carry hidden messages that only those in the know can decipher. The key takeaway? Have fun working together in your agile DevOps team. Enjoy the laughs and feel free to share your own hilarious typos in the comments below!

1.) Scum Team member: The name for a team member who excels in adding as little as possible to the project. This person is an expert in the practice of hiding from responsibilities, shoving tasks around, questioning everything, and being as unproductive as possible. The Scum Master is the team leader demonstrating this behavior.

2.) Daily Stand Down: The daily process of jointly halting work and being as unproductive as possible. During a stand down we preferably waste time on continuous interrogation, discussing deadlines, or searching for unexplained and unrelated dependencies in coding standards between your team and another team.

3.) Product Ower: The team member that is owing the delivery of a specific feature to the Product Owner. Owing the product entitles the Product Owner to ask the Team Member at any time if the owed product is done. Preferable during a lunch break, during a commute home or in the weekends. You owe the product till you deliver the product, preferably with interest. ?

4.) Used Story: A piece of functionality that has been described by the analyst and has been rejected by the product owner during the sprint. Often a used story is a relief for the Product Ower.

5.) Sorry Point: The deduction in Velocity points for making errors, causing outages, and not adhering to the clean desk policy.

6.) Definition of Gone: The definition of the moment a team member can leave. This moment is entirely depending on the amount of used stories and the mood of the Scum Master. ???

7.) Continuous Interrogation: the practice of constantly questioning your team members if they did the right thing. Followed by viciously roasting them in case of a fault to make sure they are not going to make the same error in the future.

8.) Micro Service: The typical artisan level of service that is the specialization of the staff in Dutch restaurants and bars. Defined as “just enough service that you do not leave… but no second more”.

9.) Blue-Red Deployment (compared to blue-green deployment): deployment supported by The Matrix. You have to choose the blue or the red pill, and the outcome of the deployment is upon Agent Smith or Neo. As predicted by the Oracle.

10.) Missed-Critical infrastructure: a specific kind of infrastructure that is known for low availability and instability. Preferably created by self-destructive infrastructure as code. For ultra-low availability, a practice of Continuous Destroyment takes care of causing frequent and unplanned outages.

11.) Slight Reliability Engineering: The Reliability Engineer that is responsible for the Missed-Critical environment.

12.) Bob Storage: The warehouse where your team member Bob stores an unimaginable amount of useless things.

13.) Rainforest Learning: The learning you encounter when you visit the rainforest and reconsider the carbon emission caused by the training of your AI models.

Remember, in the world of DevOps, it’s not just about deploying code—it’s about deploying laughter too. So, the next time you encounter a typo, don’t just fix it; share it, laugh at it, and maybe even learn from it. After all, a team that laughs together, deploys together. Keep those hilarious typos coming, and may your deployments be as smooth as your sense of humor is sharp! Enjoy the laughs and feel free to share your hilarious typos in the comments below!

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