12 Years working with Embrace Kids: Purpose, Meaning & Personal Growth

By Pat Capra, Kevin Malast of Malka Sports

Embrace Kids is an incredible nonprofit based in New Brunswick, NJ. They support families whose children have cancer and blood disorders and the word “support” does not begin to give it justice. We have witnessed Embrace Kids provide housing, car repairs, counseling and social services, holiday events and gifts and most of all – daily companionship to the patient families.

Embrace Kids goes the extra mile and the foundation is there for the best and worst of times for their pediatric patient families. We want to share some of firsthand experiences with those highs and lows and why we took on being honorees at Embrace Kids 2022 Annual Gala.

The First Chapter with Embrace Kids – Kevin’s Perspective

While playing Football at Rutgers University, I became aware of how many students were involved with Embrace Kids. Through Rutgers Dance Marathon and Rutgers Athletics, Embrace Kids provides thousands of students with meaningful volunteer experiences. Embrace Kids pairs up child-patients with student groups and teams for light social interaction and moral support. The patient families love this program and so do the student groups. As a former Rutgers student-athlete, I am so proud to see how this community has evolved. It is all due to sweat equity and volunteering by college students and athletes, which have been a huge part of my life and now my business. It shows that young adults can be such a powerful force and it has me very hopeful. It speaks to culture the culture of Embrace Kids and the Rutgers students and validates our work at Malka in how connections genuine connections can serve the community.

The First Chapter with Embrace Kids – Pat’s Perspective

When Brian Leonard was playing for the Cincinnati Bengals, we decided to utilize his name and contacts to benefit charity. All of my Rutgers contacts kept recommending one group; Embrace Kids. I decided to set up a meeting with the Foundation’s leadership and to receive a tour of the pediatric medical campus. Everywhere we went, medical staff and the patient families knew the Embrace Kids team. More importantly, I could see that everyone appreciated and loved them. There was some kind of magic..to see all of these greetings and smiles in a Children’s Hospital! And it was all spontaneous and seemed to be just another day. They seemed to know every child-patient well and had them smiling! I knew this was the right group for Brian to associate with and 6 months later we held the first Brian Leonard’s Rally at the Alley at Chelsea Piers. Many of the children that I met on my first visit attended the Rally and bowled with 2 dozen NFL players..it was the beginning of a decade of partnership, smiles and magic.??

Young Adult Patient Sean – Magic and Loss from Kevin’s Perspective

In 2012, we were asked to visit a young adult patient named Sean who was having a particularly tough battle with an aggressive cancer called rhabdosarcoma. Sean played football in high school and was very personable so we had a lot to chat about. Myself and Pat, Brian Leonard and Coach (Kyle) Flood visited Sean at the Children’s Hospital over the course of 18 months. I will always remember the big smile he had on his face when we walked into the room. We became close with Sean and this was personal and private for us; there were no postings or media. It was just the guys chatting and laughing the same way we would hang out in my tv room watching football. Sean’s smile was twice as big when we held Brian Leonard’s Rally at the Alley and he was able to meet the rest of our player-buddies. His smile made us all smile. ?

When you first get involved with Embrace Kids, you run on being positive and optimistic. That was easy with Sean and his family as they were always so positive too. Over time, I could sense his medical condition was declining but still in my mind, I was saying “Sean is a fighter, he can push through.” Then finally came a day when me, Pat & Brian were called to a meeting by Embrace Kids. We were told that Sean’s condition had taken an irreversible turn for the worst, which left me feeling sick. Still, the athlete in me said “Sean is a champion and will beat this.” Well, there are somethings that even a warrior cannot conquer and Sean lost his battle with cancer in May of 2013. ??

Sean – Magic and Loss from Pat’s Perspective

I remember going to Sean’s wake and what an awful surreal moment this was for everyone, especially seeing Sean’s family. When it was my turn to kneel in front of Sean’s casket, I noticed the photo of Kevin, Brian Leonard and Coach Flood visiting Sean (in the hospital) right next to Sean’s casket. Here amongst his family and friends and front and center at the wake is a memory of us visiting Sean. I had a realization in that moment..the visits were not just about fun and social interaction in the moment…the visits were creating memories. ?And the memories were not just for Sean, but for his family. Sean’s family told me they would cherish this photo forever. It dawned on me that these moments in time represented love and hope and they captured Sean’s energy and happiness. Sean valued our visits so that it is a forever memory for his family. That is why I love what we do at Malka Sports. Part of Malka’s offering to athletes is building their legacy and improving lives and making memories for Sean’s family achieved that for everyone involved.

Young Adult Patient DeMar And Being Thankful - Kevin’s Perspective

DeMar was a young adult who was slammed with a bone cancer diagnosis after falling on his daily bike ride to work at McDonald’s. Although he had almost no resources or support from family, DeMar was upbeat and always trying to better himself. DeMar made it through an intense 10-hour limb salvage oncology surgery that saved his life and his arm. DeMar got better and I got to see him at events and being healthy. DeMar took on new jobs and community college. He got his own studio apartment and eventually was promoted to manager at his valet parking job. We witnessed DeMar heal and then thrive. He took pride in doing things himself. He got great satisfaction from modest things such as when I got him a D Shock watch or when this nice lady Christina gave him Dallas Cowboys gear. We brought Mohamed Sanu to visit DeMar and wow, did the two of them click. It turned out they were both huge fans of Dragonball Z and Mo placed DeMar’s name and a Dragonball Z character on his cleats for the NFL- My Cleats, My Cause promotion. You have never seen a young man smile when we had those cleats physically delivered to DeMar….I mean, beaming! This is what its all about.

My experiences with Embrace Kids have me feeling even more blessed. Embrace Kids is a special community and the people are amazing. You have this mix of child-patients and families, Rutgers students, donors and volunteers, professional athletes and the best staff possible. Everyone is positive and thoughtful and we all have a lot of fun together too.

By working directly with low-income families, I gained perspective on life. I learned their stories backgrounds and challenges. I feel great enriching their lives with the player visits and helping Embrace Kids raise funds to pay their bills.

A Range of Emotion & Laughs Support Healing From Pat’s Perspective

One of the young adult sickle cell patients Elijah was telling me and one of the players about his idea to get a forearm tattoo with his new girlfriend’s name on it. (What a terrible idea! Ha-ha) The player started giving Elijah great ideas for tattoos including some of his own. He started showing Elijah photos of his tattoos and then out of nowhere he said “here let me show you” and whipped his shirt off to show him. We were all cracking up that he was now shirtless in the Children’s Hospital and told him to put his shirt right back on. In the end, the nurses and everyone else on the floor got a great laugh, which is exactly what is needed with kids that have cancer and blood disorders. Everyone craves normal life and people showing an interest in them.??

Malka has engaged so many athletes with Embrace Kids patient families. Frankie Edgar would visit a young adult patient who went by JC (Jersey City) John and that nickname fit. John was so jovial and full of life. He spoke big, talked loudly, had a heart of gold and the best mother in the world. He was the oldest patient on the pediatrics unit at that time and appreciated us treating him like a peer and friend. John would be looking out for the younger kids and always trying to make sure everyone else was alright and not worried about him. He was caring and strong and we admired him for that. Embrace Kids taught me to “embrace” every emotion, every day and every special memory. ?

Final Comments…The Fight Continues

This cause means a lot to us personally and professionally. We are proud about all that we have accomplished for Embrace Kids. But there is more to be done and that is why we accepted the 2022 Honoree role. There are more pediatric patient families that need financial assistance and there are still more memories to create for these child-champions. The Fight Continues…