10 tips on dealing with hard challenges

I wrote this on my blog back in November - but to be honest, it's resonating with me today, so I'm sharing it here in the hopes it provides some value.

The Context

So, last Thursday the Grabble app turned 2. Not really a milestone, but I guess it’s more staying power than perhaps we expected at the time.

For those that don’t know, the app came about as a ‘pivot’ from our social commerce website that had, in essence, flopped. Reflecting back, its actually quite hilarious to think how we managed our roadmap, and how we felt like that one killer feature we were missing would change our business. 

It’s alarming to think of the blind faith we had in ourselves, and amazing to think that there were ambitious enough investors to back us back then. Upon asking those that invested in the social commerce vision as per ‘why’ they did it, they always say ‘It was you guys’.

Having since become an angel investor with 11 businesses under my belt, I now understand that (2 investments have failed so far, so not suggesting I’m any good at it yet) . However, I now understand that we had the attitude when going out and pitching. We didn’t know anyone nor anything at first, but a year later, after the social commerce site was plundering and our original investors wouldn’t back us, it was clear that we were worse than clueless, we were failures too.

But we’ve always had this fire in our belly, the attitude to pick ourselves up, or more commonly, the other up when one is down. As a result of our dogged determination we were able to, literally from the ashes, turn that first year of Grabble, around in a matter of weeks with a product that was named in Wired’s Top 100 Startups in Europe (and Top 10 in UK).

2 years on, and no one remembers that first foray into the fashion ecomm world for us, only the product that tops the charts, grabs the headlines and continues to exist as an awkward thorn in the side of brands looking to build mobile product like we do.

Over 2.5 years we’ve had a lot of ups and downs, like we all do, but there was a week in November that rated up there for me in the most difficult, exhausting, disappointing, exciting, frustrating, upsetting and meaningful yet. And here I am in January, feeling better about it. So here are some top tips on how to survive those days/weeks/months.

The 10 Tips

1. You are running a team, not a family. There’s a huge difference. It may feel like a family, you may want it to be a family, but even with the best will in the world it’s a team, and that’s a good thing.

2. Optimise your team. This works both ways. Your colleagues are not your family, and so they will disappoint and even hurt you in ways you wish you could undo. Sometimes you’ll just wish you didn’t know their real motivations, much like a doting parent ignores their child’s faults and always sticks up for them. However, acting instead like a coach, you are less surprised by such personal actions and similarly, you are able to operate in a less emotional way, knowing that your job is to optimise your best ‘starting 11′ no matter the weather.

3. Seek Advice. You almost definitely do NOT have the answer. So go ask your peers and colleagues what they would do in X situation.

4. Evaluate the advice. Those that gave you advice almost definitely don’t have the answer for you, but getting perspective is essential, it will help you make the right decision for YOU

5. Share the advice. if it’s suitable, share the advice you’ve been given with the peers around you inside your team and see what they think.

6. Be open. Even if this exposes weakness and hurts you. Best case, your senior team who are your confidantes are supportive and will try to help you. Worst case, they will expose your weakness, prey on it, and show their true colours. This isn’t a bad thing, and it doesn’t mean any drastic action should be taken; if anything it merely means you are able to assess them better in the future and can manage them more effectively.

7. Hire on shared passion. We were trying hard to hire someone with a ton of passion and a shit load of competitive offers we couldn’t financially match this week, and he turned down everyone else, and signed up with us. Why? We connected. Having passed the technical test, I spent my interview with him talking about techno music, different parts of Italy, and our favourite artists - when asked why he chose us, he made it clear it was because we were interested in him as a human, rather than simply a developer.

8. When you are down, expect another kick. Failure to prepare for that this week really made me much more vulnerable, and as such, the impact hurt twice as much as it would otherwise. My stress levels went sky high and frankly it was unbearable and I didn’t sleep a wink. This could have been better managed by me psychologically if I was prepared for it, I should know by now!

9. You can always turn the corner. Whenever you are at a low point, a victory is round the corner - as they say ‘the only way is up’ and it’s true. 

10. No one is irreplaceable. Still learning this one, but it’s probably the most important thing to know - Burberry survive just fine without Angela Ahrends… etc etc.. just because you place trust and love in someone doesn’t mean you cant do it without them.

What I said then: "I hope some of the lessons learned this week have been helpful, I wish I could write a more gushy post on how happy I am with Grabble’s success etc but frankly, it’s also OK to be down, depleted and feeling defeated - it’s all part of the ride, and sometimes you just have to live with that".

How I feel now: I still feel like many of the challenges are still there but I've definitely got myself into a better headspace and witnessed first hand how your mental approach is the key driver to turning any foregone conclusion back around in your favour - so with hindsight I can now say that I believe my approach has worked.

Onwards.