10 Tips To Building A Strong Parent-Child Relationship

10 Tips To Building An Amazing Parent-Child Relationship

The parent-child relationship is a unique one. The Parent-Child relationship is one of the most powerful bonds in the world. Interestingly, it forms the basis of what happens in the life of the child later in life. Also determines how well the child can build relationships later on. It dictates whether the child will be able to trust people as he grows.

?A parent-child relationship is not just about what happens today. Your relationship with your child today dictates what happens in the nearest future. It forms the basis of a child's overall behavior. How well your child forms and manages interpersonal relationships is dependent on you as a parent.

Every single one of us wants to be loved and cared for. We want to be given attention regardless of our age. Adults sometimes crave this more. If adults can be like this then how much more a child. A lot of parents today believe it is always about being able to provide the necessities but it goes beyond that. Your child can have all that money can buy and still not be happy.?When you notice a certain behavior in a child, chances are his relationship with his parents has a role to play in it.

Building a strong parent-child relationship requires you to look beyond the surface. Your relationship with your child can either make or mar them. Offering a social backup, the Attachment Theory states that the quality of attachment we had with our parents or caregivers when we were young determines how we form relationships or our perception of the relationship. This makes it clear that your child will perceive life according to how you treat him or her. There are no two ways about it. They either view the world negatively or positively. Interestingly, the good part is that it is all in your hands to make or mar your child.

Here are 10 tips I believe will help in your relationship with your child/ren

1. Be a good friend

A good friend is someone we can open our hearts to. Imagine being able to pour out your deepest secrets without holding back; who did you think about? That is a friend. Your child needs you to be this; a good and trustworthy friend. Interestingly, a good friend does not betray. As a parent, you have gotten it all right if you can build a good friendship with your child/ren.?

Do not openly talk about things they confide in you about. There have been parents who openly criticized their kids in the presence of friends and it did not turn out well. Endeavor to be a friend before being a parent. A parent throws orders around but a good friend does not. Parents can sometimes be so judgemental but a good friend listens, encourages, and corrects with love. Be that friend. Be your child/ren best friend.?

2. Make Amends

Are you the kind of parents who are never wrong and never apologize? You need to change if you want a healthy relationship with your child. You are human and that makes you open to mistakes and wrongs. If your child comes to you and says you did something wrong then apologize. However, if your action or words were misunderstood then correct the notion but do not act like the child is stupid for speaking up. Meanwhile, there are times to be strict but it should not be all the time. Apologizing and making amends does not just make your child close to you; it makes them respect you. You are also teaching them to own up to their mistakes. Be the parent who looks lovingly at the child and apologizes for wrongs.

3. Make out time

Dear Mummy and Daddy, being busy with work at the expense of your child is not a wise thing to do. We know you want to make money for the family, but we also know it is possible for the child to not be alive or suffer damages when the money is finally made. What is important is to strike a balance between work and family. Make out time for your child/ren. Go out together and have fun. Learn together and eat together. Call them if they are not with you; call regularly and make them feel your presence even though you are not physically there. Make them feel important and that you need them. Appreciate them. It is not always about how many material things you can give. The little things are what count the most sometimes. There is a high chance they will also not make out time for you if you do not do it for them. Be that parent that is not so engrossed with work and chasing money. Make time for the things that matter like family.

4. Talk about sensitive issues

There are issues your children might never talk to you about. This is not because they do not trust you. Children are sometimes so shy that they cannot bring themselves to talk about some sensitive issues. In cases like this, you must bring up such conversations. Be gentle when starting sensitive conversations. You do not need to start with advice and all that. Ask sweet and genuine questions. Create a comfortable environment for your child. Be more of a listener than a talker.?

The child might never open up about such sensitive things. Avoid waiting for them to come to you all the time to talk. Start the talking if it begins to take too long. What some parents do not know is that sometimes, these children want you to be the one to begin the conversation. They want to see how attentive you are and how much you care. Go to the mountain if the mountain will not come to you.

5. Sweet Words

Do not be a dry parent; be a sweet and sensitive one who makes use of sweet words for her child/ren. Constantly remind your child/ren of how proud you are of them. Remind your child of how much you care. Constantly use words such as?I love you, we love you, we are proud of you. It does not have to be only when they pass exams or do special things. It should be all the time even when they are not expecting it. Although, this does not mean you should be sweet when they do wrong things. Use words that encourage and build your child. Use words that encourage growth. Try not to break your child with your words; you might never be able to fix things again.

6. Avoid comparison

Do you not see how well Mrs. Wellington's son is doing? Does he have two heads? Why can you not be like him? This is exactly the habit and behavior of most of your parents. Comparing your child/ren to other kids. This is bad; it kills the morale of your child. It kills their self-esteem and injures their pride. Look for ways to help and build your child rather than comparing them with the next-door neighbors' child/ren.

As a parent, you must realize that children are different. Twins who come from the same womb on the same day are different so how much more kids from different families. I know the pain of being compared to someone who is doing better and I can tell you it is not good at all. Do not compare your child with any other child.

7. Listen more and empathize

Some parents just talk on and on and on. The next thing that follows immediately the child says something is a long talk/lecture. It is not so encouraging. Learn to listen; just sit and listen and say nothing. It is not every time your child wants to hear your experiences and lectures; it gets boring sometimes too, especially when it is an experience that has been shared over and over again. Just listen and connect and feel the pain of your child. Empathy is different from pity. Empathizing with your child will help a great deal in your relationship.

8. Give Hugs

This is underrated but so important. Do not wait for your child/ren to ask for a hug before you give it. Constantly pull your child into an embrace and hold for a while. This helps in releasing fear, anxiety, and pain. It might surprise you that this is the only way your child feels relaxed. Hugs can do a lot of good in building your parent-child relationship. If your child is not the type that likes hugs then it is fine but if your child enjoys hugs then give it so regularly.

9. Smile more

Smiles are contagious. Smile relaxes you and makes you approachable. Be the kind of parent who smiles and encourages interaction not just with your child but with other people around you. Give warm facial expressions.

10. Eat together

?Eating together with your child creates a comfortable atmosphere. Interestingly, sensitive issues that you did not know about can come up. Sometimes, you should discard the whole rule about table manners when eating together with your child. Bring up conversations at the table. Feed your child if possible. Talk about how the day went or how the period has been. Eating together with those we love does magic sometimes.

Parenting is a sweet experience. It is even more fun when you have built a positive and healthy relationship with your child/ren. It makes things easier. You can start now if you do not have a strong bond with your kid/s. nothing like it is too late. However, you should keep trying even if your bond is not so strong yet.

The most important thing is to keep trying. Meanwhile, in trying, to know the needs of your child/ren so as not to keep looking in the wrong direction. Children are delicate and need time. Give them time but not too much time. Be a parent with a positive difference.?

Be the kind of parent you wish you had.