10 Things in Life that Require "Heart"

Life seldom goes exactly as planned. Many times it blindsides you, and knocks you to your knees. Problems, conflict, and tragedy arise often piggybacking on one another. No one is immune to some of these stressful life events below that will change a person's life forever.

1. Serious illness
2. Financial problems
3. Loss of a loved one
4. Loss of a child
5. An accident with personal injury
6. Drug or alcohol addiction
7. A Relationship Breakup or Divorce
8. Getting fired or laid off
9. A Bad Boss or work related conflict
10. A catastrophe that affects many at the same time

Crushed at Home, in Health and on the Job

Recently, a friend of the family landed a challenging corporate job. He loved it, but he had to travel frequently. While returning home early from a business trip one weekend, he found his spouse in bed with another man. He was stunned, and eventually they divorced. Soon after this, he found out he had cancer and began an intense treatment. This affected his job, where he ended up being re-organized into a lay off. While he went through these trials, he didn't quit. Thank goodness. Eventually he recovered from his illness and found favorable work.

This man suffered three awful events that literally crushed the life out of him, but he hung on which required "heart". This refers to courage, determination, persistence, resolve, fortitude, and a hope that life will get better.

How do you survive life's curve balls and keep your sanity? Author Rick Warren says, "Life is full of problems and solutions. The challenges we face either destroy us or make us stronger."

How Do We Best Cope?

When you research deeper into people who've suffered traumatic events, you discover one thing in common: resiliency. They all had failures and disappointments, yet they didn't quit. They may have had their bad moments but they bounced back. Resiliency is the one trait psychologists say that determines the quality of a person's life. Without it, people who meet defeat never seem to move forward. Instead they tend to blame others or circumstances. They also hold grudges, lack direction, quit too soon, give little effort, short-change discipline and persistence, and don't ask for or listen to advice. These qualities don't improve life's difficult circumstances.

Resiliency is a capacity for self-transformation and change. It's not genetic; it's learned. Resilient people recover pretty quickly from difficulties to try again and to live even more effectively. According to research they have five characteristics:

• Self-awareness- They recognize their emotional responses and why it happens. In addition, they pay attention to the behavior of others their emotions impact.
• Internal focus of control- They take responsibility for their own actions. They know the importance and power of their own choices.
• Setbacks are a part of life- They realize that perfection and winning in everything is not the script for a fulfilling life. They seem to enjoy the process and seek the humor in it, too.
• Problem-solving skills- They have learned how to learn to deal with their challenges and to persevere.
• Social support structure- They have networks of people they depend on for help, hope, and guidance, which is extremely important.

Resilient people cultivate an inner toughness to re-frame their hardships. This activates successful living even when some of their goals or activities don't work out. They aren't devastated by failure or unexpected challenges; they learn from and are fueled by them. These are the attributes that will catapult a career and sustain a happier life.

Writer and poet Maya Angelou said these beautiful words that relate to resiliency: " If you don't like something, change it. If you can't change it, change your attitude. You may not control all the events that happen to you, but you can decide not to be reduced by them." Winston Churchill added this wisdom: "Success is not final, failure is not fatal: it is the courage to continue that counts."

By the way, do you want to elevate your career or performance as a leader? If so, check out this complimentary Superstar Leadership Blog.

Or do you want a proven game-plan for your management career success? If so, check out my Superstar Leadership book.

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