10 Steps For Coping With "PTSDE&I"

Dearly Beloved, DE&I...as we have known it...has died.

I know that sounds melodramatic, but in a very real sense, what we have worked for over decades to create, and what we have lived as a daily reality has been ended. In direct language, the architects of this change openly pledged to "put an end to" the very concept.

Caught in the crossfire of this mass execution, were hundreds of programs snuffed out, thousands of opportunities eliminated, leaving tens of thousands seeking new avenues to make a living for their families, and millions of dollars cut off or ripped away. This is a loss that carries the emotional weight of death.

Death is always traumatic. We as a nation are now faced with a collective wave of post-traumatic stress over the sudden and unexpected swiftness of this loss.

Research has shown that the unexpected nature of trauma such as this, coupled with a sense of powerlessness to stop it is one of the leading causes of PTSD. The dysphoria of unexpected trauma has a similar, but opposite impact to the euphoric rush of unexpected wins that make gambling addiction so persistent.

As an active advocate of several impacted communities, to include our proud Military Veterans, I have been faced with many conversations over the past few weeks with many of my community members wrestling with the question: "What do we do now?"

Surprisingly, the steps that are prescribed for the millions of individuals who personally struggle with PTSD map very well to the organizations and communities who must now collectively face the same struggle.

On behalf of all those who have approached me for my thoughts on the matter, and in collaboration with several scholars and experts over many weeks, I would like to offer these 10 steps that our organizations, communities, cities, states, and nation might take as a framework for moving forward:

1. Seek Help

• As individuals and as organizations, we must also remember to ask for help where we need it most. Focus on seeking capable and credible sources of support. In this time of need, we must look to those who have the means to support us. This does not simply mean financial capital, but social capital, political capital, intellectual capital, and a depth of wisdom and experience that will be important in making sound decisions.

2. Build a Support System

• Now is not the time for isolation. This is a collective loss, so it must be a collective response. As we deal with our own issues, we should reach out to others facing similar challenges and support one another to get through the loss. There is a psychological benefit to helping others that will help assuage the personal stress that we feel in seeing the good that we can do for others, and feel their relief reflected back.

3. Practice Self-Care

• Both as an organization, and as an individual leading the organization, we must look internally to repair the points of weakness within our structure. For us as people, this will mean addressing our own mental, emotional, and financial health. Similarly, organizations should look to their internal controls, processes, and structures so shore up weak joints, and bolster any single points of failure.
• This introspective process can be difficult, even painful, but it can also be very freeing...one of the most important parts of self-care is eliminating unneeded effort, setting boundaries, saying "no", taking a break, and building in recreation, rest, and recuperation. Taking time to heal is critical in processing loss.

4. Avoid Unhealthy Coping Mechanisms

• This can be an extremely vulnerable time for both people and organizations who feel hurt by this attack on our daily lives. There are many unhealthy behaviors that we all must be aware of and attempt to avoid:
• Aggression/ Destructive Backlash - The angry, emotional, hasty stroke often goes astray, and usually harms the sender, as the receiver expects this, and the counter attack can be swift and decisive.
• Hypervigilant Anxiety/ Paranoia - This can lead to isolation, and antisocial behavior that blocks the important points above. It also breeds internal division that disintegrates coalitions.
• Hopeless Despondency - Bullies want you to give up. They are weak, so they don't want you to struggle. Giving up is their goal...don't make it your comfort zone...dreams die in the comfort zone.
• Reckless Behavior - This is a close cousin to hopelessness. While wounded, with little hope of the long-term strategy, some may turn to costly extreme actions without due diligence or long-term planning, leading to a premature demise.
• Factionalism / Diluting Collaborative Effort - When someone is in pain, they become more self-centered. This may lead many to fixate on their ideas or plans for solving problems that everyone is facing and working to solve. This dilutes economy of force, and unity of command toward common objectives. We must avoid everyone grabbing a lance and charging off like the legendary Don Quixote...fighting windmills, while the dragons rampage on, picking us off one by one. We must stand together as a pack, not a charge off as lone wolves.

5. Learn Coping Strategies

• The emphasis here is on STRATEGIES. Plans and tactics are short-term. Strategies are future-minded designs that are both systemic/process oriented, and duplicatable in a wide variety of circumstances. Taking a long minded view, and thinking 5 moves ahead of the moment will ensure we can win the war, and not just the battle.

6. Educate Yourself

• This relates to point 1. We have been here before. Lessons have been learned both here and abroad. Many lessons from the histories of other societies may bring us lessons that we can adapt for use here and now.
• As we all try to make plans to move forward, we should look not only into the past, but educate ourselves on what other seemingly unrelated areas of knowledge may be applicable to countering the current status quo. Besides political theory, what aspects of child psychology, micro economics, particle physics, agriculture, etc. could lend insights that may help us devise coping strategies for success?

7. Set Realistic Goals

• The gains that we made towards a more perfect union were not built in a day. No matter how fast they were crippled, they will take time to grow back. Setting incremental, realistic, attainable goals will help all of us maintain the mental and emotional energy to sustain the long game towards a more pluralistic society.
• Start with the smallest, easiest wins first. Lay a foundation of small wins to build upon.

8. Engage in Meaningful Activities

• In time of emotional pain, it may seem productive to work toward symbolic/emotional victories that do not necessarily represent progress toward real goals. Instead, we must define concrete objectives that have objective outcomes, and work toward them in a data-driven way. This will maximize economy of force, and sustain morale.
• Winning emotional victories can be a double-edged sword. While it can be a boost that motivates forward progress, too much of a good thing can obscure the end goal, causing those who are weary to slow down and savor the less meaningful, but emotionally fulfilling activity.

9. Gradual Exposure to Triggers

• Safely confront situations, places, or memories associated with the trauma. As stated before, the bullies want you to give up. They want you to avoid the uncomfortable spaces and conversations. With a huge emphasis on GRADUAL exposure, once 1-8 have been accomplished FIRST, and you and your organization feel stronger, with the appropriate support above, behind, and ahead of you, address the tough issues with unwavering resolve.
• Throughout the entire process, do not shy away from the inconvenient truth that yes, this horrible thing DID happen. Yes, you were hurt by it personally. Yes, those you care about have suffered. Only by moving past the "denial" stage of grief, can we continue to heal, grow stronger, and fight.

10. Monitor Progress

• Keep track of activities, successes and best practices. At every opportunity, celebrate the wins that are gained and proliferate all that you learn through safe and secure channels to duplicate your success elsewhere.

Disclaimer The proceeding is by no means an "expert" opinion. This was only my heartfelt attempt to share with those who have asked me what I saw as some way to make progress toward a better future. I would love to hear from you...Yes, YOU...what should be added or removed.

For those that don't share my views, and may celebrate the current state of affairs, I welcome your opinions as well. We are all one America. I pledged defend your right to state your mind freely when I raised my right hand to protect the constitution of these United States from all enemies, foreign, and domestic, and as a civilian I still do so today. I welcome you to join the discussion and help us all move forward...together.