10 Positive Quotes I Carried Around 15 Years Ago and How They Resonate Today. Mom's Wisdom Still Tops The List!

As Mother's Day approaches I find myself reflecting on the impact my mother among others has had on my life. She has taught me to be humble, to be brave, to be kind, and to be human. Through every journey in my life, my mother's wisdom has stayed with me and even today her leadership in my life remains as influential as it was in my youth.

In preparation for Mother's Day weekend and a visit from my entire family, I was organizing my office with positive thoughts of our upcoming time together, which never seems to be as much as I would like. I was purging some old "stuff" and came across one of those reminiscent boxes with more "stuff" from the past. We all have one of those boxes. It grows over the years and becomes a time capsule of memories including, pictures, awards, letters from old girlfriends, and even journals outlining words that instantly remind of who we were at the time.

I came across a list of my favorite positive quotes that I carried around back when I was 22 years old and fresh out of college starting my career. It was a time in my life that I was discovering leadership and how profound and impactful it could become in a person's ability to influence others. At the time most of my friends were going out to parties and doing what young people do. I probably should have gone out a little more reflecting back on some of the fun times I missed, but even today when I think back about the person I was at the time I realize spending my nights reading was more purposeful than anything else I could have done with my time. John Maxwell, Steven Covey, Jack Welch, and Ken Blanchard were among my best friends at the time. Not literally of course, but instead it was their words that got me dreaming about what my journey of leadership would look like ahead.

15 years later I have now met and interacted with some of the great leaders I learned from through years of reading their books. My career has taken me to places I never thought I would go back at that time.  My leadership has expanded, as has the wisdom I have gained from continuing to read and learn from my mentors over this time.  My mother serves at the top of this list.  Let me share these 10 quotes with you and articulate what they meant 15 years ago and how that has changed today:

10-"Life Is What Happens To You While You Are Busy Making Other Plans." -John Lennon

Age 22:  I thought this meant to dream big, to consider anything was a possibility for your life.  The more things I could do in my life, the more fulfilling it would become.

Today:  Dreaming big is still part of it, and dreaming doesn't stop throughout your life.  It is the passion that fuels your purpose.  But, I have learned it is far more fulfilling to be intentional about pursuing your purpose and doing so with all of your heart than it ever could be trying to become everything.  Get really focused about your purpose, and go ALL-IN TODAY.  You were put here to do a few things really special in your life.  Once you figure them out forget everything else.  Life is too short.

9-"The Most Valuable Commodity I Know Of Is Information." -Gordon Gekko (The Movie Wall Street)

Age 22:  I thought the more knowledge I could acquire and doing so faster than others would determine success in both my career and life.

Today:  Gekko was wrong.  It is not information.  It is TIME.  Be intentional about how you plan your life.  Interact with only people who add value to your life.  Put your energy into activities that give you the greatest satisfaction and that fulfill your purpose.  Information is overrated and provides no value unless you leverage it to maximize your potential.  We only have a short time on this planet to do so.  Make it count!

8-"The Key To Developing People Is To Catch Them Doing It Right." -Ken Blanchard

Age 22:  I thought the more I praised people on my team for doing a good job, the more they would like and respect me.

Today:  The key word I missed there was Developing.  The single greatest responsibility of any great leader is to develop their team.  You can't do that if you don't identify their strengths and present them with opportunities to leverage those strengths and grow into something they never saw in themselves.  Helping someone discover their potential has far greater impact on an individual than stacking up a list of thank you's.  Gratitude is immediately appreciated, but development lasts a lifetime.  Catch them doing it right, then expand them by getting them out of their comfort zone.  Expose them to something that will grow them into their purpose.

7-"Seek First To Understand, Then To Be Understood." -Steven Covey (The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People)

Age 22:  I thought the more I could learn about a particular topic and being able to confidently articulate my knowledge in a group setting or presentation would increase my credibility.

Today:  This quote was all about OTHERS and NOT ABOUT ME.  Leadership is about being curious and asking great questions.  Our customers and our employees are our greatest source of understanding new opportunities.  Listening to them to truly understand is not only fundamental to demonstrating they have our respect, but furthermore it is how we gain credibility and trust with them.  Credibility and trustworthiness must always comes before a leader's attempt to influence.

6-"No One Can Make You Feel Inferior Without Your Permission." -Eleanor Roosevelt

Age 22:  I use to like this quote and I am not really sure why since I had no clue what it meant.  I was an insecure guy and had little to no confidence.  My dreams were shallow and quite frankly I thought most people were better than me.

Today:  I try to always see the great in people and treat them the way I want to be treated.  I try and let people who work for me know every day how they specifically add value in my life.  It has worked me.  The more I pour myself into others, the more fulfillment I find in just being me.  I also find this approach strengthens my relationships at work and at home.  I also don't tolerate people who don't reciprocate in extending me the same respect I am offering in a relationship.  Leadership is always a reciprocal relationship.

5-"The Difference Between Average People And Achieving People Is Their Perception Of And Response To Failure." -John Maxwell (Failing Forward)

Age 22:  I thought this was a quote about attitude, about staying positive in response to circumstances you are dealt. 

Today:  My difficult experiences in business and in life have been the ultimate source of wisdom.  I no longer focus on comparing myself to others and what they may have versus what I have.  The things we call "gifts" in life sometimes are not the "real gifts".  Life isn't fair and some people are born with natural talents, financial means, or even intellect that exceeds what you have.  However, none of that exceeds what a human being is capable of with the right mindset and the understanding that our greatest gift of all is FAILURE.  When we recycle life's difficult experiences we grow our compassion, our humility, and our character.  Living out those 3 words is always a winning combination.

4-"No One Is As Smart As All Of Us." -Ken Blanchard (The One Minute Manager)

Age 22:  I thought this quote was all about teamwork.  The more you get people to work together, the better the results will be.

Today:  This quote is even more about leadership than it is about teamwork.  Great leaders surround themselves with likeminded individuals.  Likeminded meaning they share the same vision, values, and passion for a common goal.  But, they provide a diverse set of skills and ideas that complement those of the leader. They are also strong minded individuals who are willing to challenge the leader's thinking.  Candor and transparency are what great teams are made of.  Great teams are first built around a great culture, not individuals.  You can't get the culture right until you get the people right. 

3-"Choose Work You Love And You Will Never Have To Work A Day In Your Life." -Confucius

Age 22:  I was an Assistant Manager for a grocery store.  At 17 years old that was all I ever wanted to be in life and I loved what I was doing and had already achieved my dreams at 22.

Today:  I have worked for 5 fortune 500 companies, have served at the executive capacity, have taught leadership and mentored hundreds of professionals.  I have had the blessing to see so many of people I have mentored grow and develop in both their careers and in life.  I am on purpose and have balance across my life with more dreams today then I had even 15 years go.  It has been demonstrating the courage to consider more for my life, particularly at times when I couldn't physically see it through the imaginary wall of fear that has made all the difference.  It's not about choosing work you love; it's about choosing a life on purpose.  Follow your passion courageously and your purpose will come into focus.

2-"Feedback Is The Breakfast Of Champions." -Rick Tate

Age 22:  I thought I had to learn to get comfortable having people tell me how I could get better.  I had to get comfortable not letting the truth hurt my feelings, while using the information to get better.

Today:  Having had dozens of bosses and mentors in my life I have learned one thing, which is that very few people have the courage to "give it to you straight".  In my young leadership career when I was a rising star, so many people I worked for constantly told me how great I was and how great I was going to be.  All they did what excessively build my ego and distract me from what is common to all of us; which is the fact that we are all a very big work in progress.  There is no finish line to our development in life.  Great leaders accept the responsibility for inviting others to help show them how to grow and get better.  Feedback isn't only something we should get comfortable accepting, but is something we should outright go "hunting" for.

1-"Love Yourself First." -Mom

Age 22:  At the time I thought this was her way of boosting my self-confidence.  I thought she could see through my insecurities and was helping me prepare to chart my own course in life.  I thought confidence would bring me happiness.

Today:  I suppose there is a reason all the pre-flight airline safety messages always direct you to put your oxygen mask on first "before helping others" in the case of an emergency.  I would not realize the gift of my mother's words until I went through some really low points in my life.  It was during those times where my integrity, passion, and happiness had all but left.  It was during those times that this quote and the love and leadership of my mother got me through.  Love yourself no matter what mistakes you make, no matter what happens.  It is the love and respect you have for yourself that will push you to become a better person throughout life.  Loving yourself is the fuel that will continue to drive you to make a meaningful contribution to others and to the world.  When I was 22 this quote almost seemed selfish and an oxymoron.  I couldn't have gotten it more wrong.  The most unselfish thing you can ever do is bet your life on pursuing happiness at its fullest.  Only from there can you spread love and happiness to others.

Thank you mom for your influence in my life.  Your mentorship never stops and your wisdom continues to guide me every day.  Your are the most inspiring leader I know!

Happy Mother's Day to my mom and to all of the wonderful mother's in the world.  It is your love, your wisdom, and your leadership that guides your children through life...