10 pieces of wise advice for avoiding tensions of all kinds and stress

In order to exit the exhausting spiral of tensions and stress which often tend to overwhelm us when we deepen into our daily routine, it is necessary above all to learn to become again the masters of our own time. It is true that this requires a certain mobilization, discipline and perseverance on our part!

Each one of us knows that whenever we feel tired, tense or stressed, the option of relaxing for a day or two or, even better, departing on a one or two week vacation can be new and ideal ways for us to rebalance our lives, and even avoid chronic stress which is often caused by the tensions of daily activities. The truth is, however, that it is not always possible to immediately go on a vacation. Therefore, whilst waiting for the next holiday that will bring us a well-deserved chance to relax, we can put into practice as soon as possible, some wise and sensible recommendations that are meant to successfully help us cope with the dizzying rush when dealing with daily obligations. By always smartly applying these tips, we can avoid confronting inconvenient fatigue, tension or stress and we manage to almost always maintain a state of well being and harmony during all the beneficial actions we undertake on a daily basis.

The first wise tip:

Let us firmly and clearly formulate deeply beneficial and creative goals

At the beginning of each working period or when we move to a new phase in our daily activity, it is necessary to clearly and firmly formulate some deeply beneficial and creative goals that are related to the field of activity we are engaged into.

We can familiarize ourselves with this kind of individual practice if we try, for example, at the beginning of each week to very clearly define certain precise targets that we intend to achieve during the week ahead. It would be very useful if we reserve the time required to write them in a book, to have an objective view of them all. Then it is necessary to make a brief but thorough evaluation of these proposed targets to see which ones are priorities. Even more than that, it is better if the number one priority of the week is already established.

In order to better organize the goals that we have, it can be very useful to classify them, for example, given three classes of priority: 1. priority objective, 2. imperatively necessary activity and 3. optional activity. We will achieve this classification of the objectives depending on the perspective that we have now, at the beginning of the week. Then, according to the assessments we make, we will seek to focus especially on meeting the priorities and resolving the issues contained in the first two categories, without thinking for the moment of the ones from the last category, until we have at least met those of the first two categories.

At first, it may be difficult for us to classify our goals even in this simple system with three classes of priority. In this case, you have to keep in mind that in order to avoid becoming tense and of course not to stress ourselves, it is better not to focus on more than one priority per week and on more than one activity from the group of the ones necessary every day! Respecting this principle, we will be able to maintain our inner balance and we almost always will have a wonderful relaxed mind.

By thoughtfully proceeding in this way, we will be able to carefully pursue with a beneficial state of inner relaxation, the fulfillment of the beneficial and creative goal that we clearly formulated early in the week. We will find that by formulating a clear and firm intention, which is the wise result after much thought, will considerably help us in having more success in the beneficial steps we intend to take. However, we can directly and practically become convinced of all these if we understand a wise statement that tells us that "a beneficial action that is based on a clear and firm intention is already half achieved."

The second wise tip:

To constantly keep track of priorities and necessary actions

In order to have the highest efficiency in what we do, it is useful to constantly write our aims, necessary priorities and actions in a notebook or in an agenda. Even if this initially seems like a waste of time, the careful and responsible writing down of the beneficial objectives that we have set in an agenda, is a particularly useful activity and also, perhaps surprising at first glance, very relaxing. This kind of objectification given by keeping track of priorities, also allows us to almost always have an immediate reflection of our intentional mental orientation and our present mental content.

Such a simple but very effective practice will gradually help us more clearly and precisely formulate our goals because when we need to effectively write in words what we intend to accomplish, we are determined to achieve a minimum effort of self-objectification. We can deepen this practical exercise by trying, if possible, to as precisely as possible also write down the time (day and sometimes hour) when we estimate that we can carry out the action that we intend to achieve and we should note this in advance in our agenda.

Also, in order to maintain consistency in our action and in order to maintain a state of exemplary focus during the implementation of each such action that we proposed in advance, you should start thinking about something else only after we successfully completed the previous action or only when we sufficiently accomplished a certain stage of a broader action that we proposed previously. In doing so, we will benefit from a sense of a striking and increasingly strong inner fulfillment and satisfaction resulting from the correspondence between what we wanted and what we achieved.

It is useful to consult our agenda especially when we conclude an activity and get ready to achieve a new goal. We can thus estimate if our initial assessments were fair and which of the proposed activities is best suited to be achieved in the near future.

For this activity of planning of the targets and of assessing the deadlines that we intend it is important to regularly consult these notes, for example, at the end of the week or at the end of a calendar month, to compare the actual results with those of our goals. We will aim to be as objective and responsible as possible and to perform with lucidity and detachment this individual balance of our activity. In doing so, we will also know and understand ourselves increasingly better, being able to correct, where necessary, any inconsistencies or deficiencies that we still have in some areas of our daily work.

The third wise tip:

Let us leave our personal ambitions aside and instead increase the state of profound detachment

To be truly successful in what we do, it is useful to try to minimize our personal ambitions and not to let ourselves be overwhelmed by a fierce desire to achieve something. For this it is necessary to always act in a divinely integrated way with complete detachment. A sensible way to address the program for a week or even for just a day of work is to constantly seek to cultivate in ourselves a state of detachment in all the actions in which we are involved. This is an essential key to serenity, inner peace and success in all the beneficial and divinely integrated actions that we realize. When we harden ourselves to do something and we are stubborn and full of ambition or when we stubbornly do as much as possible in a competitive egotistical manner, we do nothing but deplete our vital, physical, mental and even spiritual resources, in a useless and absurd way, and finally, after we notice that things did not go according to our ambition we are likely to end up being disappointed, exhausted, or to even snap. Therefore, in order to always integrate in a harmonious way our involvement in a particular action it is necessary, in the light of experience gained over time, to balance the efforts we invest in the various stages of an action as harmoniously as possible. It is also very important not to deceive ourselves by vain ambition, passionate involvement when our common sense tells us that we need to be aware of existing circumstances, to harmoniously adapt to them. Also, when we are engaged in certain actions or projects that we aim to achieve, it is important not to let ourselves be confused or defocused by no matter what other actions or secondary concerns which fall outside the objectives that we clearly and firmly established previously in a state of lucidity. It is very important to constantly and uninterruptedly try to cultivate and maintain in our being an exemplary state of detachment from what we aim to achieve, like someone else is watching the whole episode of what we are doing, even though we are the ones who are involved in it. Keeping us always in this state of exemplary detached involvement, we can also see ourselves with more objectivity and thus we can correct in real-time any wrong trends that may arise.

The fourth wise tip:

Make sure you have estimated well the time needed for your activities

Most often, the main reason for the failure of not carrying out certain activities that we have proposed above is the lack of time. The real art is to optimally manage the time you have available. For this, you need to allow making time, or in other words, to know how to wisely allocate the time we have to actually accomplish what we wanted. It is also important to allocate time for what we did not foresee, since we were not aware of all the aspects involved in the action in progress. Therefore we must learn to almost always foresee and to train our ability to anticipate the evolution of things, and for this it is useful to always allocate a reserve of minimum time in order to cope with unforeseen situations that could occur at a certain time, even during a certain action that we started. If we do not take into account this wise advice full of common sense and if our agenda is full to the brim with all sorts of goals that we allocated minimum amounts of time, then it is almost certain that at some point we will encounter real difficulties when we have to respond promptly to unexpected requests because we will clearly consider that we are "too busy". The state of "being busy" is connected to our lack of flexibility in relation to the time we allocate in advance to various kinds of actions. Moreover, it is possible that actually some of the activities we have decided to do will take longer than we expected, and if we have not allocated time for such contingencies, we are in the situation of not being able to keep our promises and thus destabilizing almost the entire schedule. This can be extremely unpleasant and often it makes us nervous, tense and we stress ourselves out, especially because of the subjective impression of "not having enough time". A helpful and full of common sense form of advice that we can apply is to let those targets that are not urgent wait and to preserve at least 30% of the time in a the week, even a minimal 5-7 hours, to solve unexpected situations that may occur over time which at the time are presented as some pressing needs or emergencies. It is important to know that the priority of some objectives may change over time depending on the steps taken during the execution of the action. The priority of an action may increase or decrease and that is why you have to manifest a wise flexibility coupled with lucidity and alertness regarding the proper way of action during the intermediate phase of a predetermined activity.

The fifth wise advice:

Let us manage the time available for communicating with others as well as possible.

The act of communicating with others in various ways is an important part of our daily work. It also constitutes a key condition for success in almost everything we do in our daily lives, especially when we work as a team or when we collaborate with others in various ways to achieve common goals. In the activities we carry out with others, it is important to aim, moment by moment, for the best possible control in the activity of communication. In this direction, the deficit or lack, but especially the excess can generate a multitude of inconveniences, or they can substantially disrupt our efficiency in the activity that we do. Speaking is an important part of communication. But when we find that we constantly tend to talk meaninglessly and too much, both in direct conversation with other people, and especially on the phone, it is necessary to realise that in so doing, we are wasting much of our valuable time and at the same time we are unnecessarily depleting our inner energy. Excessive talking on the phone, repeated exchanges of impressions, unnecessary dialogues, meaningless speech, even engaging in the extremely harmful habit of chattering, which is a preamble to the tendency to gossip, as well as many other bad habits of this kind, soon induce an unpleasant state of fatigue in the being, significantly reduces the capacity to make efforts and diminishes the efficiency in what we do.

That is why a wise way to proceed is to seek the best possible measure in the communication we have with others, both through direct speech and through the various modern ways of communication we currently have: phone, internet, messages, sms, etc.

It is recommended that we check our incoming emails only twice a day and turn off our mobile phone at certain time periods, for example, during meals or significant activities that require proper focus and especially when working on something that requires a lot of focus. In so doing, we will save ourselves a lot of unnecessary fatigue and avoid discontinuities, which usually cause us to exert twice as much effort as was necessary in a certain direction. Communication with others is a key activity, but we must not abuse it. Our balance depends on knowing how to manage the time and energy assigned to communicating with others. 

The sixth wise advice:

Aim to make time for ourselves.

Harmony and balance of our being is an essential condition for the success of the actions we perform. In general, the actions we take mysteriously mirror something of our being, and at the same time it reflects us as we are and especially as we manifested ourselves in the course of its realization. Therefore it’s important that we seek to be as self-aware as possible. To achieve this, it is necessary to spend a certain amount of time with ourselves or, in other words, to deepen the state of harmony and balance which brings us as fully in accordance with our deep nature as possible. For each of us, there are certain beneficial activities that attract us deeply and that give us a deep sense of satisfaction and interior fulfillment. Whether it's reading an inspired book, meditating, walking in the park, or being present in the middle of nature, watching a wonderful movie, doing a series of body postures (ASANA-s), listening to inspired music, meeting with friends, or being with one’s loved one, sharing wonderful states, or engaging amorously in a deep state of love and mutual transfiguration - all of this require time. This time is extremely precious to us. The time spent in this way usually brings us the deepest state of inner fulfillment. This time also nourishes us with mysterious sublime, subtle energies, to which we can be extremely receptive in an elevated way, precisely because of the beneficial resonant affinities that are already awakened in our being. We have all noticed that we can integrate the pleasant actions we perform which deeply harmonize our being, in this so-called personal time much more easily. That is why it is necessary to organize our individual time as well as possible, so that every day we have a minimum time for ourselves, an optimal respite to carry out the beneficial activities to which we feel spontaneously attracted in a relaxed way. Thus, a minimum interval of half an hour a day that we give ourselves without depriving ourselves of sleep, without breaking our working time, meals, or commuting, can afford us a wonderful beneficial mood, which will then radiate from our being throughout the day.

The seventh wise and sensible piece of advice:

Make time to organize ourselves as well as possible.

For the vast majority of people, time spent on order, organization, and planning, or the time needed to evaluate the results seems to be an unproductive time. In reality, however, this is an extremely valuable and necessary time in order to have a fulfilling and coherent life. Even if for many people, the time usually spent organizing and planning activities may seem like a waste of time, this time is in fact particularly valuable, because it allows us to actually make use of this excellent way of increasing the efficiency and speed with which we will then fulfill goals and future actions.

The careful ordering of things, a fair classification and concordant classification of our objectives, even beginning with ordering the papers on which we made various notes, re-numbering priorities that have been previously noted in the agenda, as well as rearranging and numbering the notebooks or folders we currently use, all these are just a few ordering activities that help us to organize as efficiently as possible. Furthermore, in order to be as neat as possible, it is helpful to respond in time to letters, messages, or e-mails that are really important. At the same time, it is good not to keep what is no longer useful to us. When appropriate, we must remove and discard what we no longer need, and also store or archive what is no longer relevant, but may be needed later.

That is why it is useful to file and archive documents and information which is no longer up to date, but which will probably be needed later. Postponement of this type of orderly actions is in fact one of the main causes of fatigue, stress or tension, which often occur in the vast majority of people who hurried, careless or messy. That is precisely why it is essential that when we have something important to do in the area of ordering or organizing our activities, to not leave this activity, which is really important, for later. The good organization of our day-to-day activities, performed regularly, in time and without delay, it will gradually give us an increasing ability to control. In direct correlation to this, a higher state of coherence and harmonious integration into the flow of positive events which generate success, will awaken in our own being.

The eighth wise piece of advice:

Aim to honour the commitments we have made.

Promises and commitments are an integral part of everyday life. Our word is a guarantee of the trust that people grant us. Not infrequently, however, some promises or commitments we make may be the source of internal tensions, periods of excessive stress or strain, or other times may even be the cause of misunderstandings. To avoid being requested unnecessarily, in order not to be tense almost incessantly, we have every interest in expressing in a way that is as clear as possible, regarding the commitments we make, both in terms of their nature, their content, the deadlines set, and in terms of the expected result. But beware: once all these aspects are established in a lucid and fair way, we must aim to respect them. Some people often refer to this type of approach as “transparency”. Being transparent in our dealings with others means being honest and having integrity in everything we do or promise to others. Transparency is an expression of our sincerity and our objectivity. When we complete a voluntary action, and when we do what we promised to do correctly and in time, we'll be known as people of their word. In general, when those we work with get to know us as reliable people, our interactions with others will become more and more fluent and harmonious. In order to gain this trust from others, it is very good not to promise more than we know we can actually achieve at that moment.

At all costs we must avoid promises like the “moon in the sky”. Promising more than is really possible to accomplish demands too much of us, then weakens our self-confidence and also affects our trusting relationships with those we interact with. It is also good to learn to say “no” when it is really necessary. Saying “no” in a fair, intelligent, and sensible way is often a testament to honesty and can strengthen our confidence in our objectivity and capabilities. Last but not least, this honest and correct attitude towards others will earn us their respect, because they will notice that they can always rely on us if we commit ourselves to do something for them and they will understand after getting to know us better, that if we refuse them at some point, we do so only because in this concrete situation, conditions do not allow us to assist and we really are unable to help them.

The ninth wise and sensible piece of advice:

Seek to cooperate harmoniously with others.

Achieving a certain goal can often imply the involvement of several people. We may often be tempted to think that it is enough to act alone or to believe that our mobilisation may be enough to accomplish a certain beneficial goal. In reality however, we often need the support, help and collaboration of others. This requires learning to act effectively and in a beneficial way, whilst cooperating in a harmonious and constructive manner with others. Sometimes it may be equally necessary to offer our altruistic support with solicitude and detachment to others when they need it. This is specifically why it is necessary to learn to wisely accept to receive from others, and at the same time to offer support to others, when appropriate, with various beneficial actions which are divinely integrated and useful. This is the key to the success of a wise being who acts in an integrated, harmonious, constructive, effective and divine manner. When the activity in which we are engaged involves a greater complexity, when our beneficial purpose is at the same time accessible to the understanding of others, we must never hesitate, when the opportunity arises, to collaborate or delegate part of our activity to others, in order to ensure the successful completion of that beneficial action. Also, each of our assumptions must be in measure with the possibilities we have, and at the same time in full agreement with the state of divine integration that is offered to us at a given time. That is why it is necessary to understand that acting effectively also involves having a deep and dynamic intuitive awakening and a constant positive orientation of the mind. Ambition, exaggeration, temperamental involvement, selfishness, the encysted tendency to act alone, as well as the unfortunate inclination to approach the actions that we need to achieve superficially and irresponsibly, are real obstacles to successful action. Rather than being overwhelmed by work and not being able to complete something that really needs to be accomplished, it is much better to learn to ask for the support of those we can collaborate with and who are willing to work harmoniously with us, or to divide various tasks from the work we have to do intelligently amongst others, to work harmoniously with them, and thus to approach the success of the action we carry out in unison with our collaborators with sure steps, in the deepest possible state of harmony. In doing so, we will always be willing and at the same time open towards others when necessary, either by collaborating or by participating in a constructive way in the various beneficial actions for which we are, of course, qualified and therefore able to successfully perform our tasks. By requesting and at the same time offering our support, involvement, help and collaboration, we will gradually awaken a wide and deep state of beneficial and deeply fulfilling reciprocity in our being, which will then be reflected in almost everything that we will do in our day-to-day work.

Tenth wise piece of advice:

Constantly aim to immediately eliminate harmful thoughts and disharmonious, evil feelings.

Negative thoughts are always a source of suffering and inner torment. Whether they are easily recognizable or not, whether they are weak or strong, whether they are temporary or persistent, whether they are deceptive or obvious, or whether they appear harmless to us - negative, bad, or evil thoughts are the main source of torment, fatigue, tension, or stress that we may face at certain times or periods, longer or shorter, of our existence. A negative thought cannot lead us to success, because it expresses an inferior, negative state of occult resonance, which is in an obvious state of incompatibility with the beneficial perspective of success that appears at the end of performing a beneficial action. Negative, evil, and maleficent thoughts consume our mental, psychical and spiritual resources and, in proportion to their persistence, they make our being parasitic, diminishing or even temporarily nullifying our capacity for effective action. That is why it is necessary to eliminate negative thoughts as quickly as possible, especially those that we often wrongly tend to feed with concern and attention when we enter negative states and especially when we become very stressed. Negative thoughts like “I'm not good at anything”, “I'll never succeed”, “something like this could only happen to me”, must be identified as soon as possible as alarming sources of disturbance of our inner balance and at the same time they must be replaced as soon as possible with beneficial thoughts such as: “I feel perfectly able to accomplish this beneficial action with God's help,” “there is certainly a wise way through which I can accomplish this action,” or “I seek to understand justly what is happening to me, and I am ready to respond to a creative, beneficial inspiration”. To make our control over our thoughts more effective, it is useful to keep a small daily diary of the main developments we have had, regardless of the field in which we recorded that success, and regardless of the magnitude of the result! Highlighting and becoming fully aware of the beneficial states that appear every time we complete a certain beneficial action, is a fundamental and practical way to awaken and amplify a higher, beneficial and creative state of self-esteem!

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