10 Phrases Leaders Need to Speak Often to Build Trust

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Let's face it, we are responsible for what comes out of our mouths, good or bad. While those listening are 100 percent responsible for how they react to our words, choosing our words wisely will impact relationships.

If you operate on integrity and honesty, there are things you can say consistently that will help others gravitate to you and eventually say, "This is someone I can trust."

You can start with these phrases:

"That was my fault."

Put your ego aside because admitting to being human and making mistakes actually increases trust. Truth is, people who make mistakes, like the rest of us, are imperfect. As they learn and grow they become more attractive to us trust increases. We like these people more than those who come across as too perfect and unwilling to admit their mistakes.

"Would you mind giving me a hand?"

This is especially tactful after you've admitted a shortcoming, an oversight, or that you've royally messed up. Asking for help extends your honesty and your humble disposition makes you more trustworthy to the other person.

"Can I get your advice on this?"

Dr. Alison Wood Brooks, author of a study linking people that ask for advice to being perceived as more competent says: "In our research, we find that people are hesitant to ask for advice because they are afraid they will appear incompetent." She says that this is misplaced fear. The reality is that "people view those who seek their advice as more competent than those who do not seek their advice."

"I trust your judgment."

Trust is a two-way street. By extending it as a gift to others, they'll be more inclined to return the favor and trust you back. This gives workplaces a clear competitive advantage and brings teams closer together to produce excellent, cohesive work. Tip: Avoid the 'do it yourself' mantra and find ways to rely on your peers and colleagues. Show that you value and celebrate their input and give them opportunities to earn your trust.

"I couldn't have done it without you."

This is quite possibly the highest form of saying "thank you." By acknowledging someone else's effort for going above and beyond, especially if it makes you look good, puts that person on the pedestal he or she deserves! When reinforced as a cultural trait, this simple act of encouragement is a mental booster that will send ripples of trust across the organization.

"I'm all ears."

This will instantly send a message to the listener that you're open to dialog and are genuinely interested in what they have to say. Just make sure your body language matches so you are truly giving the other person your undivided attention with no distractions. Add some flattery, acknowledge them for their ideas or suggestions, and you may just spark a productive exchange.

"What can I do to help?"

This phrase can move mountains when deadlines are due, stress is high, and desperation is setting in. Servant leaders that demonstrate action through this question by genuinely helping their employees and having their backs will create a ripple effect.

"What can I do differently?"

Humble leaders with a growth mindset will use this phrase often as they learn new things. It demonstrates to their workers that they're open to suggestions, and are eager to see something from another angle. They allow their employees the freedom to express their opinions and validate them for adding value with good ideas. It may be that you, the manager, are the one that may benefit from an employee's expertise to help you see something different.

Your turn: Is there a good phrase you would add to this list?

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Way back on episode #2 of the Love in Action podcast, I sat down with legendary management and leadership expert, Ken Blanchard, Chief Spiritual Officer and Co-Founder of The Ken Blanchard Companies, and author of many classics, including The One Minute Manager. Ken and I unpacked the true meaning of customer service and servant leadership. The million-dollar question I asked Ken point blank: Does love truly belong in business and the workplace?

Listen/subscribe: Website  |  Apple Podcasts  |  Spotify  |  Download

Highlights from our conversation:

• Ken shares his three secrets to creating raving fans from a customer service-facing role.
• He shares two stories that prove anybody can make a difference in their customers’ lives.
• Servant leadership: There are two parts to servant leadership. The leadership part is about vision, direction, values, and goals, because leadership is about going somewhere else, and the responsibility of that goes with the hierarchy. The servant part is more philosophical. Turn the pyramid upside down: you work for your people, who work for their people, who eventually work for your customers. It’s not about you, it’s about them.
• When you serve first and lead second, people feel empowered and important, and they will go out of their way to take care of your customers.
• “Profit is the applause you get for creating a motivating environment for your people,” says Ken.
• Wander around and see if you can catch people doing things right, and praise them and encourage them for it. Listen more than you speak. Ask more than you tell.
• If you create an environment where you’re cheering your people on, they’re going to cheer your customers on, and it works.
• The biggest addiction you see in organizations is the human ego, and there are two ways ego usually gets in the way: (1) false pride and thinking you’re smarter than everyone else, and (2) self-doubt because when you’re doubtful and fearful, you’re focusing on yourself.

Listen/subscribe: Website  |  Apple Podcasts  |  Spotify  |  Download

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A final message for senior leaders and executives...

I have created the ‘From Boss to Leader’ course -- a virtual leadership development training to help new and emerging leaders/managers learn the skills to succeed on the job. Watch this 2-minute video to see if it may be right for your team. Then book your 15-minute call and I will personally speak with you to make sure it's a good fit.

At your service,

Marcel

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About Marcel Schwantes

Marcel Schwantes is a virtual speaker, executive coach and advisor, journalist, author, podcast host, and syndicated columnist with a global following. His work has been featured in Inc., Business Insider, Fast Company, The New York Daily News, CNBC, Forbes, and others. He speaks to audiences about the human side of work, and how cultures of care, connection, and belonging outperform the competition.