10 Myths About Spousal Support Debunked

Spousal support, also known as alimony, is one of the most misunderstood aspects of divorce. Whether you're the one paying or receiving it, there are plenty of myths that can lead to confusion or false expectations. In this list, we’ll break down 10 common misconceptions about spousal support and what the reality is when it comes to court decisions.

1. “I don’t need to work.”

Not true. Even if you have kids or were a stay-at-home spouse, courts can still expect you to find a job and impute income if you don't.

2. “If I lose my job, my support goes up/down.”

Courts won’t let you quit or stay unemployed just to manipulate spousal support. Income might be "imputed" based on what you could earn.

3. “I’ve never worked, so they can’t expect me to.”

Even without experience, courts can assume you’re capable of earning minimum wage. No free pass.

4. “If I’m cohabitating, my support won’t change.”

Wrong. Living with someone in a marriage-like relationship can reduce or cancel spousal support, even without remarriage.

5. “My bills matter in support calculations.”

Personal bills (like rent or car payments) don’t hold much weight in court. They base spousal support on income, not lifestyle.

6. “Marital standard of living stays the same after divorce.”

This is almost impossible. The same income now has to support two households, so the marital standard of living usually drops.

7. “I can stop paying support if I quit my job.”

Nope. Even if you voluntarily leave a high-paying job, the court can still base your support payments on your previous income.

8. “Spousal support lasts forever.”

It can end if the receiving spouse remarries or enters a committed, cohabitating relationship.

9. “The court will consider both spouses’ financial struggles.”

The court doesn’t care if you’re struggling with bills. Your financial mismanagement isn’t a valid argument for altering support.

10. “Divorce erases all marital obligations.”

Your financial choices during marriage, including staying at home or choosing a lower-paying job, can influence spousal support decisions even after the divorce.

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Understanding the truth about spousal support can save you from surprises and help you prepare for your financial future post-divorce. It’s important to know what courts actually consider and what myths won’t hold up. By managing your expectations and getting informed, you can better navigate the complexities of spousal support.

For more insights, check out my book, Getting Divorced, Now What?

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