10 Myths About Introverts and more...

In today's edition of Burke's Bits:

1. I Am An Introvert
2. Marketing Tip
3. From the Research Files
4. Pun of the Day

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I Am An Introvert

You may or may not be surprised to learn this about me.

Even people who think they know me are surprised when I tell them.

They’re surprised because they don’t know what it means.

For most people, when someone says they’re an introvert (including those who use the label) they think it means “to be shy”. They're wrong. Shyness is based on fear of social judgment. Introversion is more about how one responds to stimulation, including social stimulation.

I feel most alive…most ‘switched on’…most capable…when I’m in quiet, low-key environments.

Whereas, extroverts crave stimulation and activity and being surrounded by groups of people.

I discovered a book called?The Introvert Advantage ?(How To Thrive in an Extrovert World), by Marti Laney, Psy.D.

Though I’ve not read it in it’s entirety, I can see that she explains many of my eccentricities. And I will be the first to say how wonderful it is to be understood! And even more wonderful is to have scientific proof of why I’m different than most people.

A section of her book (page 71 through page 75) maps out the human brain and explains how neuro-transmitters follow different dominant paths in the nervous systems of Introverts and Extroverts. If the science behind the book is correct (and I honestly don’t know if it is) it turns out that Introverts are people who are over-sensitive to Dopamine. Too much external stimulation overdoses and exhausts them.

Conversely, Extroverts can’t get enough Dopamine, and they require Adrenaline for their brains to create it. Extroverts also have a shorter pathway and less blood-flow to the brain. The messages of an Extrovert’s nervous system mostly bypass the Broca’s area in the frontal lobe, which is where a large portion of contemplation takes place. I will be the first to exclaim “Hah! Finally there is proof!”

Unfortunately, according to Dr. Laney, only about 25% of people are Introverts. And this leads to a lot of misunderstanding since society doesn’t have very much experience with people like me.

So here are a few common misconceptions about Introverts (not taken directly from the book, but based on my own life experience):

Myth #1 – Introverts don’t like to talk.

This is not true. Introverts just don’t talk unless they have something to say. I dislike small talk, but can do it at social functions because I’ve learned how. Get an introvert talking about something they are interested in and they won’t shut up for days. Just ask my family.

Myth #2 – Introverts are shy.

Shyness has nothing to do with being an Introvert. Introverts are not afraid of people or of their judgment. What we need is a reason to interact. We don’t interact for the sake of interacting. This is why I’m able to function well in social settings – there’s a specific reason for me to be the initiator of the conversation. If you want to talk to an Introvert, just start talking. Don’t worry about being polite. Oh, it's also why I'm very comfortable speaking from the stage. There is a reason for me to be there.

Myth #3 – Introverts are rude.

Introverts often don’t see a reason for beating around the bush with social pleasantries. We want everyone to just be real and honest. And oh, wouldn’t that be nice if it happened regularly? (yes, it would) Unfortunately, this is not acceptable in most settings, so we can feel a lot of pressure to fit in. And this can be exhausting.

Myth #4 – Introverts don’t like people.

On the contrary, Introverts intensely value the few friends we have. I can count my close friends on one hand and am darned loyal to them. If you are lucky enough for an introvert to consider you a friend, you have an ally for life. Once you have earned their respect as being a person of substance, you’re in.

Myth #5 – Introverts don’t like to go out in public.

Nonsense. Introverts just don’t like to go out in public FOR AS LONG. We also like to avoid the complications that are involved in public activities. We take in data and experiences very quickly. And as a result, we don’t need to be there for long to “get it.” Then we’re ready to go home, recharge, and process it all. In fact, recharging is absolutely crucial for Introverts.

Myth #6 – Introverts always want to be alone.

Introverts are perfectly comfortable with their own thoughts. We tend to think a lot. We like to have problems to work on and puzzles to solve. But we can also get incredibly lonely if we don’t have anyone to share their discoveries with. We crave an authentic and sincere connection with one person at a time.

Myth #7 – Introverts are weird.

Introverts are often individualists. We don’t follow the crowd. I often say that I don’t ‘herd’ well. We think for themselves and because of that, we often challenge the norm. We don’t make most decisions based on what is popular or trendy, but on what makes sense at the time.

Myth #8 – Introverts are aloof nerds.

Introverts are people who primarily look inward, paying close attention to our thoughts and emotions. It’s not that we are incapable of paying attention to what is going on around us, it’s just that our inner world is much more stimulating and rewarding to us.

Myth #9 – Introverts don’t know how to relax and have fun.

Introverts typically relax at home or in nature, not in busy public places. We are not thrill seekers and adrenaline junkies. If there is too much talking and noise going on, we shut down. Our brains are too sensitive to the neurotransmitter called Dopamine. Introverts and Extroverts have different dominant neuro-pathways. Look it up – this is the cool part of Dr. Laney’s book.

Myth #10 – Introverts can fix themselves and become Extroverts.

A world without Introverts would be a world with few scientists, musicians, artists, poets, filmmakers, doctors, mathematicians, writers, and philosophers. Introverts cannot “fix themselves”. It would be nice to get respect for our natural temperament and contributions to the human race.

Amazing how many of these attributes/traits sound just like Autism or Asperger’s, doesn’t it? I’ve not been formally tested, though I have had a psychiatrist friend (who knows me well) tell me that “high functioning Asperger’s” fits me. My response to that is “how interesting, now let’s move on please”.

I stopped trying to be an Extrovert many years ago – I leave that to my husband and friends. I thoroughly enjoy meeting new people and learning their stories – one person at a time. I can have a good time in a crowd, I just tend to be the quiet one (unless you get me talking about something I enjoy).

Anyway, I’m not looking for any kudos or affirmations – just sharing something you may not know about me.

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Marketing Tip

Do you use at least one - preferably several - of the seven key emotional hot buttons that cause people to react? compel them to take action?

Fear - Greed - Guilt - Anger - Exclusivity - Salvation – Flattery

Emotions you can tap into with sales copy, video, images.

When people say "I don't buy things based on my emotions" they're lying. I know. Because I'm one of those people. I will swear on my dead dog's name that I research every purchase (major purchase :wink wink:) so that I can make a logical decision to buy or not buy. I say this and know I'm lying as I say it.?Everyone?buys based on an emotion.

When your marketing messages tap into the emotions of your ideal buyer, they become prepared to say Yes to the sale.

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From the Research Files

aka random bits of info you may or may not be able to use in your life

Did you know that George Washington invented instant coffee?

No, not?that?George Washington. The inventor and businessman, George Constant Louis Washington.

An emigrant from his native Belgium, he arrived in the New York area in 1897 and dabbled in several technical fields before hitting upon instant coffee manufacture during a sojourn in Central America in 1906 or 1907.

He began selling his coffee in 1909 and founded a company to manufacture it in 1910...the G. Washington Coffee Company. Based in New York and New Jersey, his company prospered and became an important military supplier during World War I.

Washington's company was sold to American Home Products in 1943, shortly before his death. Though the coffee brand was discontinued by 1961, Washington's name is still used today in the product G. Washington's Seasoning & Broth.

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Pun of the Day

I just heard about a new logical fallacy: the “ad homonym” attack.

It’s not what it sounds like.

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If you are at all informed /entertained /amused /educated by

today’s edition of Burke’s Bits, here's where you can show your appreciation.

Click Here To Buy Me A Cup of Coffee

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With Gratitude,

Charlene Burke

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