The 10 Leadership lies we all know (and what to do instead)
Emanuele Mazzanti
Turning leadership talk into real impact—through facilitation, development, and coaching. I bring energy and curiosity to foster connections & growth. 2h57′ marathon runner.
In this month’s newsletter, we’re cutting through the noise. ??After my last post, the DMs and comments came in thick. So, I’ve wrapped them up and pulled together some of the best (or worst?) leadership clichés we’ve all heard… and maybe, just maybe, even said.
But rather than stopping at just calling them out, I’m adding what to do instead—real, tangible practices you can use to lead in a way that’s clearer, fairer, and more human. Because leadership isn’t about catchy slogans; it’s about what actually happens when the slides are closed, the emails are sent, and decisions need to be made.
So, by popular demand… here are the 10 biggest leadership lies—and how to lead with more clarity, trust, and impact.
1?? “We’re all leaders here.” — Cool, so who’s responsible when everything goes sideways, or who actually makes the hard decisions? Oh right, the real leaders.
? Clarify accountability. Empower people by trusting them with the big picture, specifying why and what needs to be achieved (rather than how); and also own your role—step up when tough decisions need to be made and support your team in executing them.
?? Clarify accountability. Define decision-making roles clearly. In team meetings, explicitly state who owns what and who makes the final call.
2?? “We have a culture of feedback.” — as long as it’s positive, sugarcoated, or directed downwards.
? Make feedback a two-way street. Normalise candid, constructive conversations at all levels and model how to receive tough feedback with humility.
?? Make feedback a two-way street. Set a “feedback loop” rule: after every big decision or project, ask, “What should we start, stop, or continue?”
3?? “I trust my team completely.” — but also, I need to be cc’d on everything. Just in case. Oh! And let me double-check every email before you send it.
? Trust through action, not words. Let people own their work without micromanaging—skip the unnecessary cc:s and pre-approvals. Trust is shown in autonomy, flexibility and self-direction, not inbox traffic.
?? Trust through action, not words. Stop unnecessary cc’s and pre-approvals. If you tend to micromanage, try a “default trust” approach: let your team run with a project, then review outcomes instead of process details.
4?? “Titles don’t matter.” — until you challenge someone with a fancier one. Also, try making a decision without the right one ??
? Treat everyone with respect, regardless of title. But also acknowledge that clear decision-making structures help teams move forward efficiently.
?? Balance respect and clarity. Use titles functionally (for decision-making, escalation paths) but ensure people at all levels feel heard in discussions.
5?? “We want diverse perspectives.” — as long as they align with what we’ve already decided.
? Actually listen and do it actively with the intent to understand. Encourage real debate, be open to changing your mind, and create an environment where differing views are welcomed, not just tolerated.
?? Encourage real debate. In meetings, assign a “devil’s advocate” role to challenge decisions and prevent groupthink.
6?? “We empower our people.” — to do more work, with fewer resources, in less time, in exactly the way how we tell them.
? Give real autonomy. Provide the resources, support, and psychological safety for people to take ownership and make decisions—not just more work.
?? Give real autonomy. When delegating, use the “what, not how” principle—define the goal, but let the team decide the approach.
7?? “There are no stupid questions.” — except the one that challenges your boss. That one is stupid.
? Reward curiosity. Celebrate tough, challenging questions, especially the ones that make you uncomfortable—they often lead to real growth.
?? Reward curiosity. Open team discussions with, “What’s a question we should be asking but aren’t?” and celebrate thought-provoking challenges.
8?? “We value work-life balance.” — but also, “Hey, can you jump on this quick call at 11 PM?”
? Respect boundaries. Encourage a culture where people can disconnect without guilt, and model it yourself by not sending late-night emails.
?? Respect boundaries. Set a “no after-hours emails unless urgent” norm—and model it yourself. Use “schedule send” if needed.
9?? “Failure is a learning opportunity.” — until it makes us look bad. Then it’s just failure. We bury it under the ′lessons learned′ and move on quickly without really learning anything from it.
? Actually learn from failure. Talk openly about mistakes, truly learn from them, take responsibility as a leader, and ensure real changes happen instead of just post-mortem lip service.
?? Actually learn from failure. After mistakes, run a “fail forward” session where the team identifies lessons, not just fixes.
?? “Leadership is a journey, not a destination.” — cool, but so why does it feel like running on a treadmill in a room on fire with no exit?
? Make the journey sustainable. Leadership shouldn’t feel like burnout in disguise—set realistic expectations, pace yourself, and help others do the same.
?? Make leadership sustainable. Encourage leaders to take breaks and set realistic goals—burnout helps no one. Try the “two-week rule”: every two weeks, check in on workload and priorities.
?? Bonus lie by popular demand: “I have an open-door policy.” — translation: "I’m always available... except when I’m busy, in a meeting, or avoiding hard conversations."
? Be truly available. An open door means making time for real conversations, even the tough ones. If you're busy, schedule dedicated time to listen.
?? Be truly available. Block time in your calendar for “office hours” where people can bring challenges without waiting for the “right moment.”
Bottom line? Leadership isn’t about the buzzwords—it’s about what actually happens when the PowerPoint slides are closed. It’s about what we do. It’s about what actually happens in the room when no one’s watching.
Your turn: What’s the biggest leadership cliché or BS Line that makes you roll your eyes, and how to fix that?
Drop your insights below!!
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Making culture tangible and actionable | Creator of the Culture Design Canvas used by over 500,000 global professionals | Culture facilitator, speaker, and author ??
1 天前Spot on as usual Emanuele The worst thing? Many leaders don't realize they're lying – they believe their own BS...
Say what you mean and mean what you say. Those statements feel like the values on the wall. There's good intention behind the words, but enough thought needs to be given to what those statements actually mean, for the leaders as you point out. Great food for thought Emanuele - even if painful for some.
Challenging leadership clichés is essential. Real impact comes from actions, not just words. Thank you for the insightful read, Emanuele!
Marketing & Brand - Team Manager - Nordics
6 天前Spot on!
I bridge divides and transform leadership teams | Engage with me to become a relational leadership wizard
6 天前Emanuele, with each of these, there is the thing we say, and then there is the real thing—the deeper reality that is often at odds with what we are insisting. Correcting that deviation and aligning the without and within brings clarity for everyone. That’s true even if that alignment exposes nasty truths about what’s really going on—because at least then we can get about correcting things without the fog of misrepresentation obscuring the truth or the path. This couldn’t be more apropos with what is unfolding on the world stage at the moment.